JenRose

thanks for the smilys i like them. Bard i am having a big spongebob cake for my party, me and my mum are making it. im going to see the new simpsons movie on friday im really happy for that.

Im Mike. im very happy about going to school. thanks for the help you have give my mum. spongebob likes the school but squidward doesnt cos there isnt a band class but im not allowed to tkae spongebob to the new school or squidward or patrick. im getting a new coat and shoes and a bag and my mum and dad have said i can have a party with my sister cos she is starting nursery as well so we are having a party for all my friends and family. from mike.

Oh wonderful wonderful news Hev, im so pleased for you and Steve. Well done you for never giving up and hanging in on there for your boy!!!!! love jen x

M is sat with dd and my niece and the kids next door on the trampoline and they are all eating pizza!!!!! he.s telling everyone he sees!!!! The meeting was a bit tense in times, with the manager accusing me of deschooling M and letting him lounge about he house all day She started telling me all about PDD and i said yes i know I HAVE IT and she still carried on, she said they wouldnt name his dx of AS cos our psych wasnt from CAMHS and IPSEA lady said, erm im not sure that you are allowed to do that, ill check with our legal dept, she tried saying that we didnt need certain wording ie DS needs help with toileting and self care, so IPSEA shot her down and said "your own Ed Psych and OT have recommended that he DOES need support around toileting and dressing/undressing with PE" so she backed down, she said she didnt feel we needed wording regarding his sensory difficulties, again she quoted her own ed psych and OT back at her. At one point she shouted at me "Jen you cannot have it both, you cannot have a special independent school named AND the wording of your choice" and my IPSEA rep said "why not, other children have it, why not M,s statement"? she asked us to withdraw our tribunal and our rep said well when we receive the ammended statement thats something we shall consider. She has agreed to name the school. keep most of the wording in the statement but she wont budge about his dx of AS, but my IPSEA rep has said she will check it out with the legal dept and let me know where we stand. so it was a good result, although she was very snobby and not happy at having to do this as this is not her area, but cos we complained to the boss of the council she was brought in. so i know who to go for when we run into trouble with R,s statement!!!!!!! When i think back to 2 years ago, when we were being threatened by EWO,s and accused of making up symptoms and M wouldnt talk, eat or come out of his bedroom for months and we have come so far and he,s so excited about going back to school, its just amazing it really is, im so glad i never gave up cos there were many times when i thought sod it, i cant do this anymore but i couldnt give up on M.

The LEA have agreed to name the independent school on part 4 He starts in september!!! 2 YEARS of fighting them and finally he is going to school, i cant believe it. My IPSEA rep asked me how i felt when we came out of the meeting and i burst into tears. I cant explain how happy we all are. We phoned M at home and he screamed YEESSSSSSSSS down the phone, my mum and my sisters and my nieces have all been crying, we are so happy. I will post more about what happened cos there were a couple of arguments, some so pathetic they will make you LOL, but im making pizza for my family and icing Ms, promised Simpsons cake.

just had an email from the SEN boss, she says there really is no need for an IPSEA rep to come as they want to talk to ME as m,s mum about the best way forward and this is not a run through of a tribunal!!!!!! wonder why they dont want my IPSEA rep there? Tough, she,s coming.

Im hoping they will say yes to M going to the independent school, i cant see why not cos they stopped the tribunal from going ahead. My IPSEA lady phoned me last night, she is definately coming whoo hooo i feel so much more confident knowing she will be there and DS psychologist is coming to argue the case that no mainstream primary can cope with M,s complex needs. Im soooooooooo nervous, i feel like a wreck. M is nervous too, yesterday when we went shopping he saw a bart simpson cake in sainsburys that you can put your own message on and he asked if they say yes today can i buy him the cake and put congratulations M on it. so i said yes. meeting is at 1.30, please send me positive vibes.......................

LEA posted me a copy, i nearly fainted when i received it, they actually did something they said they would!!! Dear Ms XXXXX I met with M and his parents last week and it is clear that he is a young person who is highly anxious and easily becomes overwrought. It is also equally clear that academically he is a very able youngster and should have no difficulty in coping with the demands of a mainstream curriculum. However, he is extremely emotionally fragile and I suspect currently would struggle to cope with the social and emotional demands of a mainstream environment. Perhaps as a way forward as I understand M,s parents are currently in dispute with the LEA and a tribunal case is pending, it would be advisable to consider M completing his primary education at R school with a view to working closely with an identified secondary high school, to consider the possibility of a return to this environment towards the end of YEar 7 or even in Year 8. Once we have established relationships with that high school and developed and strengthened M,s emotional resilience, then a supported transfer to a secondary high school could then, hopefully, be more viable and more likely to succeed. This could be closely monitored by the LEA and subjected to Statutory review with intervening monitoring visits so that informed judgements can be made with regard to M,s emotional functioning. We would also be in a position to work closely with any clinical support tat could be provided for M to ensure that he was given the best possible opportunity to engage in the educational process.overcome some of his fears and enjoy regular attendance. If the LEA feels that my suggestion has some merit then we would be in a position to offer M a place at the school commencing at the start of the academic year in Sep 2007. I would be grateful if you could confirm before the school closes for the summer on 27th july whether you wish to take up this offer. so this is what the meeting on tuesday is about, im hoping they will agree to this, if not then its back to tribunal.

i know how you must be feeling, they did this to us last year, told us on the friday it was "ready to go" and we didnt receive it until 10 days later. it was so annoying.

She has emailed me the agenda for tuesdays meeting: 1. Introductions 2. Independent Schools, letter 3. Parents Views 4. Local Authority Position 5. Discussion 6. Agreed Outcomes. The best thing as well is that my IPSEA rep phoned me and said she is 99% sure she can make the meeting on Tuesday as well as our psychologist!!!! im so hoping they will agree to him going to the independent school.

dont know if they were playing a game, they could have been. M was very brave im so proud of him, Dave went round to one of the boys house to speak to his mum, she was horrifed-she knows M has ASD. she made her son apologise to him and he did and she apologised to M as well. Dave said that M said at the end "this always happens to me, im getting used to it" and that the boys mum looked really upset. Ive told M he,s a very brave boy, for telling us what happened and having the courage to face the boy and his mum. The other boy is about 4 years older than M and his parents wont give a monkey,s about what he,s done but he wont be playing with M again. Im going to not have to let him go to the park, its just out of view across the road, unless im watching him and i cant do that all the time.

M has just come in crying his eyes out. after a while he managed to tell me that the 2 friends he has been playing with have in the last 10 mins took it in turns to slap him in the face. he said he asked them why are they doing this and they laughed. I AM FUMING i legged it out of the house to the park across the road but they had gone, ive come back in and im so annoyed. Dave has gone up to the house of one of the boys, this boy i dont understand because he is a nice quiet boy and his parents are nice as well, perhaps it was peer pressure, i dont know but i cant stand it. after everything that M went through with school i was hoping he could have friends and start socialising properly. these boys were an hour ago playing in our back garden on the trampoline with M. he has been crying to me saying its just like school, everybody hates me.

she replied again at gone 5pm. Dear XXXXX I have just returned to the office and will try to respond to your questions. The meeting will address the matters that are still issues i.e. Michael's Statement of SEN and the provision to meet his needs. I would not usually write a formal agenda for a parent meeting but will if that would make you more comfortable. I am authorised to make decisions about provision on behalf of the Council. You are at liberty to bring a representative to the meeting, of course, but again this is not essential for the meeting to go ahead. I am trying to move the case forward and see if resolution is possible as it is unlikely that a Tribunal can be rescheduled before September and R School has asked me to get back to them by 27 July. A copy of the letter from R School has been posted out to you today. Please can you let me know as soon as possible if you are able to attend a meeting next week - I am being pressed to attend a meeting on Tuesday morning but I am holding the time until I hear back from you. i still dont understand why we need to meet, we tried to address the issues back in march and they wouldnt budge an inch. independent psych is able to go with us next tues afternoon, i am speaking to him later this evening and am still waiting for my IPSEA rep to get in touch.

hmm just had a reply from the sen managers assitant. Ms B is extremely busy with the end of term time arrangements and as such she will reply to your email later on today.

independent school closes on 27th of july so i presume they want to know if M will be starting back in september or not. Dave phoned the school but they told him that they have sent all paperwork to LEA and we are to liase directly with the LEA now. surely we are entitled to a copy of this letter though given that we are at a tribunal stage, i dont understand why the school havent sent us one.

have emailed sen manager asking for a synopsis and an agenda. have advised her that as she only sent the email at 5.30pm last night it has not been possible for me to contact my representatives and i cannot attend any meeting without one of them present so im waiting for them to get back to me. i also asked her to email me the letter she has received from the school as we have not been sent a copy. ive cc,d the exec director in as well. ive also asked for a decision maker to be involved. i dont really want to go to a meeting, surely they can decide yes or no to put him in without needing a meeting, my gut feeling is they want to talk me into or out of something. i havent managed to get hold of my IPSEA rep or the independent psych and im not doing anything until ive spoken to them. ive not gone through all this for 2 years for them to make me fall at the last hurdle!!!!!!

yes i agree with you there, i felt uneasy when i got the email and my first thought was why? i have forwarded it on to my ipsea rep and psychologist, he usually comes with me to every meeting and shuts them up when they try pulling a fast one as i dont always realise. i think she will try and get me to come to some agreement with the wording on the statement but she could always put this in writing. i dont trust this LEA at all.

head of SEN dept has emailed me this afternoon. she says she has a letter from the headteacher of the independent school we wish M to go to and that they want to know the LEA,s reply by 27th of July. She says she cannot make a decision before meeting with us and has asked me to arrange a date next week. is this normal to do given that we are in the middle of a tribunal situation? im just wondering what she will want from us next week. thanks

oh im so sorry, you must be absolutely gutted. dont know what else to say.

we bought the kids a trampoline at the weekend. its a 12ft with enclosure, it was on special at that well known DIY store with 2 letters. WOW what a difference in the behaviour of DS. he goes on it in the morning and at night and he is so much calmer i cant believe it, ive had no arguing, throwing things, telling me he hates me, nothing like that. And dd is much calmer too. i cant put it down to anything else but this!!!!! if id have known this before i would have got one years ago.

Ah i think the parking space has sorted itself out. Nursery are moving into a brand new building next door in september and guess what i saw today? 3 yes 3 DISABLED PARKING BAYS!!!!!!!! so we can park there now!!! dont think it can have had anything to do with us though probably just perfect timing!!!!! ah well thats one less battle to fight!!!

yes i will do that pp, just as soon as i have the letter from school, im going to fax it to sendist and then do a covering letter to mr chief exec telling him that we want to move forward. i didnt realise that they would be haggling over the cost, that made me chuckle to think of them haggling!!!!! M onlyhas a year to go till high school and its sats next year, the independent school has told me they will "cram him" (is that the right word) on a 1-2-1 basis to make sure he is up to speed with the rest of his year as he has missed 2 years. im trying not to think about the last 2 years, it gets me so angry. before he came out of school the psych did IQ tests and said he was 136 and that he was in the top 1% of children for his age, he has lost 2 years so i cant think he would be like that now. my dad and uncle keep telling me and dave to take legal action against our lea for failure to educate, my aunty is a headteacher and she is soo angry but i dont want to think about that yet. its another battle and ive got to start R,s statutory asessment off in september as well.

The saga continues............. Last monday the head of the independent school told Dave that yes they could meet all of M,s needs and that there was a place for him. He said he would write to the LEA the next day. So i emailed the exec man this morning and asked why A, our phonecalls are not being returned and noone will speak to us regarding the situation B, why if they have known since Friday 6th July that there is a place they havent informed us or SENDIST. and could they let us know (IPSEA told me to say this to them) if they are willing to name the school on part 4 or are we going back to tribunal. so i received a reply back saying they are waiting for paperwork from the school, that as an authority they dont act until they have written confirmation, - fair enough, and that they will then consider whether to place M in the independent school and on what basis- i dont know what that means, but that i should feel free to go ahead with the tribunal if i so wish. So Dave phoned the school and the secretary directed him back to the LEA but he said NO, i want a copy of this letter you have sent to the LEA so they said they would send it. now as its the LEA that postponed the tribunal are they not supposed to pass on information to us and SENDIST? The school breaks up on weds so i dont know if we will get the letter, i dont beleive the LEA hasnt got theirs and they are stalling for time. in the meantime im left with an extremely anxious son who just wants to know can he go to the school that he likes. Its so frustrating.

hope everything goes right for you on thursday. will be thinking of you love jen x

we all sat and watched this even the kids, DD kept saying "spinning" with a grin on her face and DS couldnt understand why the mum was ignoring the kids. i felt so sorry for the mum, it was clear that she was not coping at all, i cant understand why noone had told her the things that Supernanny and Dr Koegel did as some of them are basic-like lock the door. i cried when the little boy spoke and when the dad broke down. i thought it was a lovely ending.