Andie

Hi Just to let you know that since my first posting I took the advice about confronting my parents with their attitude to my daughter who has AS and I left details regarding the condition and what they could do to help alleviate the pressure that I am under. They gave the cursory acknowledgement but not much else, but then I should have realised that I would not get much cooperation from them anyway. The latest is that when they say hello to her she gives them the dirty look and grumbles out a hello, fairly normal for her. Later I am told she is very rude and should be more polite. I gave this a miss, I am fed up of trying to explain that you need to show patience and understanding and then she may be more interested in talking to them. Though they do not have the time to spend with her as she is not very forth coming with information. Latest issue is over Meg and her warts. This is causeing her a lot of distress and is not willing to tell us who has been making an issue about them in school. As you all will know an AS child does not like being centre of attention and I have left a message with the school for them to deal with. Does anyone have any problems with warts? Good news though Meg is in the school Choir and is singing at the end of school production. GREAT ISN'T IT!! Anyway must stop whinging. Andie

Meg is 8 and up till a few years ago I felt she was fairly normal with some little querks that made her stand out from the crowd. But Empathy would be limited but as she has got older she seems to understand more and does actually ask me if I am upset if I am upset and of course I would be honest with her as she is beginning to read facial expressions and is beginning to understand what empathy is. She has started to show consideration if I am upset by asking if she should empty the dishwasher or make me a drink Andie

With my daughter we had to fill in assessments for both the paed and psych and so did the school. Also the Paed went into the school to assess her in the environment she has problems in. But in my experience the face to face factor can be miss leading. Sorry not much help here but again this is what happens my area. I have heard a lot of different stories on how people are assessed and it all depends on the person diagnosing the child. I have a friend whos child has ADHD and AS and she had a different set of things to do and we both have the same Paed for our children.

Please can someone tell me how they cope with school clubs. My daughter loves to go to the school holiday club. As you can well appreciate it is at the school she goes to. Well the problem is I have got to find somewhere for her to go for the first week that is in a different environment has someone got any good ideas how to deal with this seeing as these holiday clubs will not be opening until the holidays begin. Her main problem is change of scenary and different people and gets upset and agitated about having deal with new people. Should I take that week off or is there some way I can prepare her emotionally so that she learns there are times when things do not go to plan.

I have to agree with the other people Rachael is doing well that is what you need to concern yourself with. My 8 year old girl also has AS and like you is very hard on herself that the tears when she does not come the all important first is soul destroying for both you and the child. But in recent months with the guidence at school with an absolutely wonderful teacher (I hope the year 4 teacher is going to be just as good. Wishful thinking) megan is beginning to learn that first is not that important and that doing your best is good enough. Rachael has great school results and that should be applauded and give her a pat on the back. I know that it is hard to deal with their insecurities and getting them to understand that there will always someone better but I find that constant reassurance sometimes (not always) is one of the best ways to go.

Hi first posting, but I'd like to know if anyone else has issues with regards to their own parents giving you the parent lectures over you not disiplining your AS child appropriately. This is now becoming beyond a joke, I have tried to inform them that their grand daughter has problems when she does something wrong or she accidentally breaks something she panics and is unable to see beyond this and becomes verbally agressive. this ends up with being all my fault and as a parent with an AS child if they are on an emotionally roller coster then that is the time when she is not the most approachable child. It does not help that they do not want to understand what I am going through and that the endless trips to the paed, psych, speach and language meetings and all the other bits and peices one has to do is making me feel incredibly low and my self esteem is feeling very battered. I get support from friends and the school (have found that this is not the case is some schools) but the people you want the support from most have been very few and far between. Any advice on how to support my daughter and get my parents to understand would be appreciated.