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Everything posted by Annea

  1. Can someone delete this, as for some reason it went up twice! thank you x
  2. I see there are no replies, so will share what I found out eventually regarding her getting support at a main stream college..... this is in Wales though and I believe it is different to England. I Was visited by Careers Wales and the man who saw me was really good. He told me that regardless of weather she has a statement or not, because she is on SA+ He will fill in an educations and skills assessment which will apply for funding for an LSW at college, He will also apply for her to use a laptop in class right from the beginning because her writing speed is slow. He will also arrange for her LSW to liase directly with lecturers to ensure she is not falling behind and is getting the best out of the course. I am a bit more confident knowing this and having spoken to the tutors that she will in fact cope with the lessons. IF I can get her through level 2!
  3. I know a few teachers post on this forum and was wondering if anyone knows where I can access any on line support for the above course including work examples. My daughter with autism is coming toward the end of the first year of the course but the school are very dismissive of her really and I am pulling my hair out. She is not thick but struggles with the instructions they give. I am trying to find resources so i can help her back up what she is being taught at school. She wants to do the level 3 at college, but cant get on to it without at least 2/3 distinctions at level 2. I know she can do it. Just needs a little guidance. Can anyone help me please I have been googling for hours to no avail. (i have looked at the official site but to be honest it confuses even me so she wont stand a chance)
  4. My 15 yr old has one more year before moving up to college. At present she has quite a modified timetable and quite a bit of 1-1 support with the LSW's She is undecided whether to stay on at 6th form or go to a local college to do the same course which is a science based BTEC. I am worried that if she goes to college, she will not get as much support as what she is having now (she has no statement just SA+ ) I am thinking of appling to the welsh assembly for funding for her to get a priory day placement at the same college she will go to, so she will get the extra support she needs. But if she decides to go to normal college can she access any extra support and if so where from? We are in wales so it is a bit different than England I think, but I don't want to leave things to last minute as I know how long funding takes to put into place. He school will support ++ whichever route she takes but I just don't know where to start. Any ideas?
  5. wow no? My daughters friend recently passed her test and now drives and she was never assessed! Her instructor knew of her HFA though.
  6. When the social was here twice, she asked her if she was happy for me to speak and beth nodded and at times beth actually told me to answer the questions so they know that. They are just wasting time
  7. Ok, I have a paediatrician involved in her care who has asked Cahms to get on board but the waitiing list is about 1-2yrs. Our social services offer a buddy system where she can have someone who she can get to know (usually an older teen or young adult) they take the kids bowling / cinema etc etc Because I am often ill (I have an illness that is deteriorating and often I have to spend prolonged amount of time in bed) She needs to get out of the house. There has been many a time when I have been rushed in hospital and even now social services know my children are home alone, they have shrugged as they have no one to come in and watch them or make sure they are ok. Yes my GP knows about the self harm and has also written to CAHMS. I am just so tired of fighting the system.... Took me a long time to swallow my pride and admit I needed help only to be told tough! Edited to add, my daughter wont write it down, she just can't identify her needs in that way
  8. Sorry about typos am on my phone and it is difficult with text correction:)
  9. Can I ask, I mentioned my 15 yr old with asd recently that she had been self harming. I too have a chronic illness and am a little unstable in my illness presently so I have asked for a social work assessment for my daughter. She had a social worker before but was discharged without them telling us Bd when I complained it was all brushed under the carpet . Being unwell I just re referred her. The social worker came but to be honest my daughter was not complia t and be aide of her communication difficulties I ended up answering most questions. Today I got N email from social worker to say that to proceed with referral they want to I terview my daughter on her own to see her side of the story . I have told her this and explained to just answer their questions but adamantly refuse to meet with them . I feel they do not believe me and are trying to get a different story from her so they can brush it away . I have been told in the past that she can use me as her advocate as long as she is happy which she openly says she is, in fact whenever we are anywhere she often asks ne to answer questions for her as ah wont answer directly. I have never lied or abused this trust she has. So I have emailed social services back and asks why they wish to speak with her alone and M waiting a reply but Ann wondering where we stand. If I force her to meet with this woman I know she will either ignore her or walk out but it will also cause great stress which is a huge thing wih her right now and not something I am happy putting her through. She never went through this last time so not sure why now! Can anyone Advise me of her and my rights? Thanks
  10. if your son is of college age, I am not sure a statement is necessary. Certainly in Wales, the Welsh Assembly funds specialist college placements. where the alternatives do not work. And will extend time of funding. My daughter was initially funded for 2 years for her A levels but as she was half way through second year and looking at Uni's, her anxiety levels went up so I reapplied for an extension which she got, she dropped an A2 and then did that this year with an extra course. She is now goign to uni in september. Although she had a statement at school. this was not considered for her college funding. Instead it was all based on school / college reports, and professional assessments. There are day provisions but also residential colleges. Not sure how it works in Engand though.
  11. My eldest daughter went to one of the Priory Schools. All of the children were at or above average academically. All of the children have ASD's, a few other associated conditions such as dyslexia, dyspraxia, ADHD. These schools are really expensive and LEA's fight tooth and nail not to fund placements. The only reason we got a place funded was because there was no place in Wales AT ALL which was ASD specific. It seems the onus is on the parent to have to prove that all other alternatives freely available (or more cheaply available), will not be suitable. Of course, for those who can pay the private fee's it's a different ball game. When looking at schools remember you can visit any of them with or without your child in the first instance. Any school that isn't happy for you to visit I would avoid. I am big on gut feelings, but of course OFSTED reports etc might be useful. There are lists of independent ASD provision if you google them. Its then just trying to find out peoples experience with each one. Bearing in mind that it is different for each of our children anyway. Good luck. x
  12. Just wanted to share some good news... As my daughter with AS will be studying Pyschology at Uni in September, she still needed to acquire a maths GCSE at grade B or above. (even though she has the relevant entry grades at A level) Maths isn't her thing really (at all) but first time she managed a C and is redoing her module maths this year. She just got her module results for two modules and got two A's which means that unless she completely misses the point in the summer exam, she will definitely get her much longed for B grade or even better!! She was so excited down the phone... the results always come to here as this is listed as her home address so I get to see them first and its nerve racking every time I open a result for her. I am so impressed at how well she has done, and how she juggles her studies. just wanted to say whoooooopppppppeeeeeeeee lol x http://www.youtube.com/user/SquigglePigDesigns/videos (a personal Video blog about how our family copes with Autism and it's difficulties)
  13. Hi I really sympathise where you are right now. My eldest daughter struggled with education from the start, we didn't realise right off how many sensory issues she had. She had transition review before she went to high school, but to be honest, having had this done with her, my middle autistic daughter and am going through one presently with my son, I often feel they are grossly inadequate. Changing to secondary is a huge change even for a neurotypical child, for someone with autism it is massive. When my eldest was in primary, I was appalled at the thought of sending her away for specialist provision, we too had page upon page of needs identified by psychiatrists, psychologists and education experts. We were told by the LEA that she would be better off in main stream, that we would make her worse if we sent her away, we were told she would never experience 'normaility' if we sent her away. Whilst she was at main stream (she last till year 9 before she became a school refuser) they did try but for many children it just doesnt work! Every day they would come up with a new scheme to try to help her, every week we would have a meeting to address new and on going problems and meanwhile she was becoming more and more unhappy. In the end, we went to tribunal and requested residential specialist provision and she has never ever looked back. For us and for many I know, the she which is main stream just doesn't work. And the 'add on' units which are supposed to be the perfect answer, are just a cheap half way house. I know specialist provision isn't for every child but it is for some. As for a way back in to main stream following specialist provision... it does happen! My eldest daughter started at an asperger school where the classes were all on site. About 5 children to a classroom, a teacher and a few TA's. She also had support outside of class time. After her GCSE's she stayed with the same provider but moved into college residential education in a different area. Here, the education is given within main stream provision. The students being supported to varying degrees in the college. The stufdents are also supported utside class time. My daughter is ready to go to University as are 4 out of 5 people who live in her unit, ALL of them now at main stream college having come from a failed mainstream experience then into full residential Specialist schooling before their current placements. The whole purpose of this type of school, is that it aims to prepare the young person to cope with life. I am 99% sure that life would have been very different now for my daughter if she had not been able to access where she is now. Of course, we have had issues, it has not all been plain sailing. But when she was 10-13 yrs I was spending as much time in school as she was, and things were getting worse. As soon as she started school, things got better for her. This is just what worked for us... but certainly not the horror story many people told us that specialist schooling would be. As for home schooling, we looked in to it. But realised we would get very little support and also we knew my daughter would need to learn to be able to cope with school or college or a work environment at some point so it wasn't for us. Also because I am ill I can never be sure I would be able to provide her with what she needed at any given time. Home schooling is really hard, its very interactive and If you are working full time at home, could you manage to teach your son and do your work justice? ) I really hope things get sorted for you, it is so painful. x http://www.youtube.com/user/SquigglePigDesigns/videos (a personal video blog of aspects of family life with children with ASD's)
  14. Annea

    You Tube Blogs

    I know we all have our own stories of living with Autism, but I know for me over the years I have been greatly helped by knowing that others have or are going through the same thing. A while ago a friend suggested I make some you tube videos, so I have started to... these are a very amateur account of aspects of our life. They are relaxed its just me talking. I have had some nice emails and am happy to continue. These are just personal accounts, of course I am not telling anyone how to suck eggs, or telling people what wil work for them.. I suppose I am just telling folk how it is for us. If it helps even one person then it's worth it. So please do have a look if you feel so inclined. But be kind. Yes I look rough LOL I also have an incurable illness so you see me warts and all! http://www.youtube.com/user/SquigglePigDesigns/videos x
  15. Please can someone advise me? I have 4 children, my eldest who hs A/S is doing amazingly well and is off to universty in september. My middle daughter is possibly on the spectrum but undiagnosed and doesnt use any support... My son is 10 and dyslexic and has quite a bit of help at school... My middle daughter is 15 she is half way through her GCSE's ... Over the past year or so I have had a few worries with her. She has a LOT of support at school and a modified timetable. She has quite a lot of social skills input. She now is developing her own style ( A bit Goth) And I have allowed her to embrace this style. She was quite over weight last year and suddenly dropped weight. I found out she was starving herself. And with lots of care we seem to have got over that stage. she now eats healthily, is watched discreetly at school and eats at home. Today (and this is the BIGGY) we all sat down to lunch and her bracelets (she wears lots of these plasticky bangles) had slipped up and I saw marks on her wrist, when I asked her what it was she tried to hide it. I sent my other children out and looked and she had sliced into her skin over and over. Just superficial but it looks so nasty. We have chatted and she either wont or cant tell me why... but I just don't know what to do. I know she is worried about her future. She wants to go to university and with help she can do the study. But she is scared of failing (I have never really pushed any of the children just encouraged them to do what they want and helped them when they ask) so this is like a self imposed feeling of failure. How do I get her help? I am terrified of her increasing this behaviour or doing something even worse. Has anyone experienced this? Thanks in advance.
  16. sigh... I feel so sad at the moment and feel this last year is falling apart for my daughter... As you can see from my first post she budgets for 5 days a week and every other weekend the college is closed and she comes home. The other weekend she eats with the other students who are cooked for by the staff. Last night, she was ever so upset as she had been upstairs in her room studying.. she is right at the tip of the house as the only female. When she came down stairs she realised that tea had been served and eaten and basically she had been forgotten! No food had been cooked for her. Of course due to her difficulties she couldn't confront anyone but spoke to me and was so very upset. All of the independent living task were supposed to have been put in at the end of last year, but when she went in September the manager of the new house had very different ideas of what she wanted int he house.. We are now coming toward end of first half term and it is a shambles. They are trying to put things in place but this is causing disruption within the house and with other students, noone seems to know what is happening. The principle actually visited me at home as the college is an hour away and I am not always well enough to travel. he assured me that everything would be sorted ASAP but now these latest issues.... I am so dissapointed that this her final year is turning into such a shambles.
  17. Fir me it was a hugely difficult decision to go for residential. But we were all including my daughter at the end o f our tethers, She knew she couldnt go back to mainstream. When she visited the priory school she first went to, she told me it was the first time she ever felt comfortable and I knew she would be ok. Luckily she was there at a good time, those just behind her wernt so lucky and the school has had a lot of problems. I would say do your homework and be a presence int he school no matter how far you are, my daughter is still residential at a different college and has been in three different residences in her time there (she has been resi for 4.5 yrs now!) I am still 'in their faces' I do feel that sometimes things can slide if we don't keep an eye on what is going on, This year has been quote problematic and she is just looking forward to getting out and starting Uni... I know not everyone has problems, but some do... I would just say make sure you get to know ALL the staff, speak to them as often as you can and make sure problems are addressed as quickly as possible.
  18. Thank you for your input, I absolutely would not put her at risk.... she is a very healthy young adult her ideal meals would be wholemeal past/ rice / chickpeas etc with lots of fresh fruit and veg.. This is the sort of food we eat at home. as this is a new plan she is still eating from her old allowance which also allowed her to dip into the store cupboard, so she does have things frozen. But i have spent the date looking at what constitutes a balanced diet and it can NOT be achieved on that amount. I also found out that three of the other students who budget as a group actually have several pound more per day EACH than she does. I just need to get my facts straight about this and wanted to reassure myself i was not being OTT .
  19. Meant to add, no chance of her bulk buying as she gets the money each week and can not carry any over, to help with bulk products!
  20. The more I look into this the more silly it seems... You are right with your sugestions however a couple of things.... she DOES have to buy all her own staples out of this such as seasonings etc. She also can NOT hold any money over from week to week if she could in order to buy something more expensive the next week. Thing is, who wants to live on the same meal every single day of the week? The only supermarket she can get to, is Tesco, so that is the only place I can check out and have checked out... I mean she is a really healthy girl and she runs, so is a size 10 and if she doesn't eat, she loses weight very rapidly. I think I will have to intervene.... initially she was getting £2 for her evening meal and was struggling with that. But their final calculation is 50p extra for her lunch and 50p for her breakfast. I just don't see how they can work that out. It almost makes me feel that they are preparing her to fail.... I mean I don't want her coddling, it was our idea that she be pushing independent living skills, but all her friends are now at UNI and none of them have as little as she does to eat. it means she can't even really drink anything other than water. She is not a tea / coffee person but does like herbal tea every now and again. No chance of that as it will blow 2 days food budget it would be so easy for me to shop online then send it to the house, but I am reluctant to do this as they have already been paid to provide for her. x
  21. Hi everyone can I have some feedback please? My daughter who is 18 is in the last year of her A levels , she boards at an independent A/s college. Her plan for this year in readiness for uni next year is to budget for herself, this includes getting an allowance for her breakfast lunch and tea any snacks etc. in this she has to get EVERYTHING from bread and milk to butter etc.... She has rung me and they have just finalised her allowance which is £15 per week. This means £1 per meal if she eats 3 meals a day. Is it me or does this sound a little mean? We have looked at tesco website ( the only place near enough for her to shop) and we can not get a balanced diet inc fruit and veg on this amount. Her place is funded through welsh Assembley so should I be insisting on more or does anyone have any ideas on how she can feed herself for this tiny amount? Thanks for any input.... X
  22. Annea

    laptops in class

    Thanks for the responses. I need to clarify.... my daughter already has a laptop, she has used one for several years although her touch typing speeds are not that good. The laptop she was awarded last year was for school use but to be honest the school ed psych and OT whilst identifying her difficulties have failed to identify really how best to over come her difficulties. She is fairly bright and memorises a lot of stuff from certain areas but she really struggles with sequencing for one, so for instance she can work out algebraic equations but has to work out her 2 X tables... Also if instructions are given orally for example a homework task, my daughter will struggle to listen to the instructions whilst memorising it to write it down.. she cant write it down whilst listening to it. Only today whilst at the school collecting my middle daughters exam results I spoke to the Senco about the possibility of her having a dicataphone so she can review information after school but i was told permission wouldn't be granted by majority of teachers as they would feel it a privacy invasion. He said they might be prepared to let her record the lesson summary... however my daughter tells me this doesn't often anyway.... I have already modified her curriculum for the coming two years, pairing it down so she is only doing the necessary subjects needed to get her into college as that's what she wants, but I am still worried that she wont cope... not because she is not capable academically but because she isn't being taught in a way that allows her to overcome her difficulties. As for the laptop, your answers have sort of confirmed my fears, that she probably won't get benefit from it in a classroom. it's tough to know what to do really.
  23. Annea

    laptops in class

    hi there, My daughter starts her GCSE years this september. She has ASD, has a poor working memory, writes slowly and takes longer than average to process info. She was awarded a laptop last year and this year is encouraged to take it into class with her. My question is... what do kids use the lap top for in class, is it beneficial? will she benefit? Does anyone have any sucess stories about using laptops to help with study in the classroom? thanks in advance
  24. Thanks everyone, lots of ideas.... not sure a chamber pot will work... she is a big girl and I think she might equate it to a potty.... I did ask her quite seriously if she did like the feeling of peeing into a cloth type thing and suggested adult diapers but she was appalled. I know she is ashamed of it, hence why she hides them, i have asked her to pop them staright into the washing machine... we had this arrangement when she wet the bed, she would just strip it eventually and put it in the wash put this seems like a horrible secret. I will read the various links, and I think i will also get a specimen sent to the doc just in case it is something underlying. We have a light on the landing on all night but I might also put a plug in night light in her room.. she actually has her bed in a sensory space.... made from two huge built n cupboards knocked together, she has various lights etc in there but at night she likes it pitch dark and closes herself in with the remaining doors, so if I put a light in her room (outside of her bed space) it might make it less scary should she open the doors in the night needing to pee. She is horrendously messy but this mornign she cleaned her room completely, sprayed all her carpets and matress with febreze and opened her wondows to let the air in so maybe my losing my temper and getting upset yesterday might have made her have a think about things... so hard when we want our children to be happy and keep hitting walls.
  25. just to add, the post above about the smell of yourself ont he sweater, my middle daughter age 16 who is apparently NT has had a baby quilt from her days in a cot, it has been washed only once and she sleeps with it every night as she says she likes the smell.....
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