School trouble-help!

[bikergal]

Where do i start? Proposed statement still not arrived but apparently there are 10 hours on it. Met Senco today after she sent me a letter inviting me to discuss ways of helping dd1. Well, she was belligerent and totally unwilling to support dd1 and wouldn't listen to a word I said putting words into my mouth assuming I wanted dd1 removed from a certain lesson and removed from break and lunchtime. I just wanted support for her. She said they couldn't 'put on' one child after I said I wasn't happy about dd2 having to support her at break and lunchtimes and escort her on the bus to and from school. So it's ok to 'put on' dd2 then? I asked about support because I realise dd2 would like to have some kind of life. I asked if autistic outreach could do some social/communication stuff with dd1 , she tried it once before it involved playing games under supervision encouraging interaction, this was refused as 'we already do games at break'...not under supervision they don't, not the kind dd1 needs. Then she said about not removing her from social situations 'coz she'll never learn to communicate', well she hasn't learnt to do that at school yet and I don't expect her to frankly...some kids don't 'learn' communication, indeed some kids find it very difficult even with the appropriate help....*draws breath*

 

I've been thinking re statement...as no school is named...I know recommendations were made from various professionals re a small school (which this isn't), if I wanted dd1 to go somewhere else (this would have to be fee paying there is nothing in mainstream and no special school locally) would I have to prove that no mainstream school could support her complex needs? If I could do this would LEA pay some or all of the fees? Will be looking at alternatives tomorrow but after that meeting and her attitude my gut feeling is that that school is not the place for her. I just want to see her settled somewhere. Any advice really appreciated, i feel exhausted by it all and I'm shocked at her attitude.

[annie]

Hi Bikergal,

 

I'm so sorry to hear that you are having a bad time at the moment <'> .

 

In answer to your question re: type of school and fees, LEA's will normally try and place children in local mainstream schools, so yes, trying to prove why these wont be able to meet your daughters needs will play a big part. It doesn't matter whatever type of school is eventually named in part 4, the fees are not your concern, they are down to the LEA.

 

I'd give IPSEA a ring, they will be able to give you some sound advice as to what to do next.

 

Annie

xx

[David Matthew Baker]

I hope you manage to get this sorted. Luckily I have always ended up working with SENCOs who seem flexible. The one your having to deal with sounds terrible. Best of luck, David.

[bikergal]

Thanks for replies Will give IPSEA ring not sure if I'm up to it today though Been awake since before 4 with the ideas for a comprehensive letter which I'm going to write to the headteacher and copy to the Senco and Chair of Governors (who I'm on fairly good terms with) quoting DDA and their refusal to help dd1 which is tantamount to discrimination. Asking dd1 to talk in the morning and ask one question each day is ridiculous, I had that scenario about 4 years ago at work when after a chat with the manager I agreed to try and say 'hello' each day. I found it extremely difficult to even do that, couldn't in the end and left (my union rep agreed that 'I don't go to work to socialise and as long as my work was ok that's what really mattered'. Trouble is life's not like that, if things continue as they are my daughter will be unemployable, and I will have another fight on my hands in a couple of years for SS provision. All this fighting for all this time has been because I don't want her to end up like me which is exactly what looks like is going to happen now. Actually she'll be worse than I am because her problems are more pronounced. Makes you wonder whether it's all worth it, I've got to ask for a DLA reconsideration yet.

[butterfingersbimbo]

am not sure what to suggest but wanted to send you a <'>

[Bagpuss]

Bikergal...your post made me

 

<'> <'> <'>

[Clare63]

<'> <'> <'> So sorry to hear tour having a bad time <'> <'> <'>

Clare x

[bikergal]

Thanks for the support guys, really hate having to do this but if I don't nobody else will

[bikergal]

Letters done and ready to go to Senco and Head tomorrow, statement duly chased (again), should be here by beginning of next week apparently...just got DLA stuff to do and send tomorrow then I'm sorted for now...phew

[Clare63]

Well done knew you could do it. Here's hoping you get the rsults you are looking for.

Good luck

Clare x