suzie-girl Report post Posted May 13, 2007 Where do i start! A couple of years ago my brother got set up and ended up in prison he had never been to prison before and i was devestated,so who do u think got lumberd with paying the mortgage,yeah say no more.he got released a couple of months later,then the debt just got worse from there.If it wasnt money to pay baliffs or they were taking his van or giving him 300 to get his 3 kids something for xmas(guilt got the better of me)He ended up spending 30 each on them!!!!!!! more baliffs etc.Then he decides to start a buisness,more debt.i stopped giving a while back now and been asking and asking for my money back which is just over 2500,yeah not small change ay I kept asking if he could get 1000 for march so i could get a new car,there has been no mention of it.apart from the fact he told me his accountant said his buisness had turned over 100,000 in the last year and he's getting a tourer for 7000 and just got a remortgage of 30,000.I got to my limit the other day and tex'd him,i got a really bad reply he was horrible.oh and he's got my disability badge aswell and wont bring it back.i do everything for my whole family but they never consider me or my situation,they just use me when they need money,like im loaded coz i get disability for dan,id give up everything just to have my baby ok.They aint got a clue!!!!!!!!!.why is he making me feel the bad one if it wasn't for me he would of lost everything.I haven't seen him since the tex id be a liar to say im not worried(i hate confrontatins)and bearing in mind he's a big strong man thats a bit of a bully.Not quite right is it at 35 to be scared of your brother.All of this because i helped.I think the only optoin iv got is to count my losses wish he would just give me my badge back tho after all it is me whos got the disabled child!!!!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
caren Report post Posted May 13, 2007 <'> <'> Have you contacted council and say you've lost your badge and need a new one , sorry not much help Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
suzie-girl Report post Posted May 13, 2007 No not yet,im hoping still that i'll get the badge back at least Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
caren Report post Posted May 13, 2007 Hope he gives it back as a last thing you could contact the council that way you have a blue badge without getting your brothers back up Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bid Report post Posted May 13, 2007 (edited) But if he's using it to park, that's illegal And I've no idea, but could you get in trouble 'letting' (I know you're not really, just thinking like the local authority ) someone else use your badge?? Boho Edited May 13, 2007 by bid Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tally Report post Posted May 13, 2007 (edited) Hopefully not if you took the badge in the person's car because they had the disabled person with them, and then accidentally forgot it??? (or at least claim that is what happened) Is there anyone else in your family who could talk some sense into him about this? Edited May 13, 2007 by Tally Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hev Report post Posted May 13, 2007 the trouble here is suzies brother is a bully who a lot of people are frightened of and he plays on this,suzie is worried if she pushes things he will hit her. it wasent a case of her saying no to the badge,he doesnt really accept no,if he doesnt return the badge how can she get a new badge without any repercussions from her brother?could she say she lost it?we are worried that might get her into further trouble though. this is causing her lots of upset,let alone the large amount of money he owes her,any ideas? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
llisa32 Report post Posted May 13, 2007 Hi...I can kinda relate to what you're going through with your brother, I too had one that managed to totally manipulate me for many years..unfortunately you love them so you go with it. I think for your peace of mind you need to decide which actions you can live with and if this means taking the least confrontational route then so be it. Regards your badge it should be easy enough to ring and say you're not sure which relie's car you left it in and as no ones found it yet you need a new one. Text your bro..tell him you had to order a new one for obvious reasons. Regards the money...I'd prob guess that you're right and that you'll have to write it off..but..you need to find someway of making sure you don't get sucked in again in the future...I know how hard it can be when they claim to be desperate etc but you need to look out for yourself and your own immediate family and Bro's gotta start standing on own 2 feet. Are there any relatives he might listen to? I do feel for you...it's a horrible situation to be in and you end up loving them and hating them at the same time Take care Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kathryn Report post Posted May 13, 2007 I agree with Bid, if your brother is using the badge fraudulently (why else would he be keeping it?) there could be some comeback on you if he's found out - the last thing you want is to have a heavy fine or the badge taken away permanently. If you report it missing or stolen you are at least covering yourself and presumably the council would cancel it and give you a new one. You can't be the first person to lose a badge. No advice to offer about getting the money back - except the obvious - don't give him any more. Easy for me to say though, I haven't got a brother or a sister to make these kind of demands on me. Hope you get the badge sorted out at least <'> K x Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
suzie-girl Report post Posted May 14, 2007 Thanks everyone,this situation is really getting me down,i just want back whats mine.My brother has always been ok taking but hates giving back,he hasn't seen my nan for 2yrs coz he owes her 800.It's stress i dont need!!!!!!!.if it comes to the crunch i will say he must of took my badge out my car,if it comes to me or him i wont hesitate,i'll suffer the consiquences Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Flora Report post Posted May 14, 2007 Suzie, If I were you I'd; ring the CC and tell them what's happened re blue badge, OR just tell them you've lost it or had it stolen and ask for a replacement, regarding the money... I'd right it off as gone but NEVER ever give him another penny. Flora Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
suzie-girl Report post Posted May 14, 2007 i'v just tex'd my brother asking if he can give my badge to my nephew,i actually got a reply he said he's given it to him so thats 1 prob out the way .Im just going to have to accept my losses on the money!!!!!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
suzie-girl Report post Posted May 14, 2007 Dont worry Flora i dont want to see him again and i defo have learn't my lesson,never will he get anything or any help from me again. YOU CAN CHOOSE YOUR FRIENDS NOT YOUR FAMILY(UNFORTUNATLY)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites