Anyone else at private mainstream school?

[llisa32]

Hi,

 

The child psychiatrist mentioned that I should ask the school to involve an Ed Psch regards J's writing and cognitive problems - she said all schools had access to one but wasn't sure about private schools.

 

I think I found a thread the other night that may have mentioned I'll prob have to pay for the ed psch myself? - has anyone had experience of this? - how does it work?

 

Also re Senco..I currently have no idea who this is at J's school and have sent them an email to ask..I'm hoping to try and arrange a meeting before we go back in sept - I assume all schools must have one of these?

 

Sorry of either question seems dumb...still on a learning curve at moment

 

And...still with the private school thing..although we ended up in one by accident/default..the environment couldn't be more suited and he's really settled and can stay there until age 16 (slong as we live on baked beans )..could you give me your experiences of private schools and how your children have got on with them?

 

Thanks all

[mrs fussy]

Hi,

 

The child psychiatrist mentioned that I should ask the school to involve an Ed Psch regards J's writing and cognitive problems - she said all schools had access to one but wasn't sure about private schools.

 

I think I found a thread the other night that may have mentioned I'll prob have to pay for the ed psch myself? - has anyone had experience of this? - how does it work?

 

Also re Senco..I currently have no idea who this is at J's school and have sent them an email to ask..I'm hoping to try and arrange a meeting before we go back in sept - I assume all schools must have one of these?

 

Sorry of either question seems dumb...still on a learning curve at moment

 

And...still with the private school thing..although we ended up in one by accident/default..the environment couldn't be more suited and he's really settled and can stay there until age 16 (slong as we live on baked beans )..could you give me your experiences of private schools and how your children have got on with them?

 

Thanks all

Hi i dont have any experience of private schools, but i can see why these would probably suit ie....smaller class size, a more flexible curriculum, wish i could get my lad a place at one the flexible curriculum would definetly suit him, but you know we woul have to live on beans too, a tin a week lol.

Mrs F x

[Alyth_mum]

Hi,

 

The child psychiatrist mentioned that I should ask the school to involve an Ed Psch regards J's writing and cognitive problems - she said all schools had access to one but wasn't sure about private schools.

 

I think I found a thread the other night that may have mentioned I'll prob have to pay for the ed psch myself? - has anyone had experience of this? - how does it work?

 

I know that you can do a self referral to the LEA Ed. Psch but don't know if the LEA one will visit a private school.

 

Is J funded by the LEA or by your 'baked bean' fund ? If J is funded by the LEA I assume that there sound be no problem with the Ed Psch visiting the Private School.

 

I think there are private Ed Pych who you have to pay (no idea of amount) but try the LEA first. The LEA Ed psch often work through the Summer Hols so might be worth trying to contact them tomorrow (Monday)by telephone, if you can , you have nothing to lose.

 

Louise

[mrs fussy]

Is J funded by the LEA or by your 'baked bean' fund ? If J is funded by the LEA I assume that there sound be no problem with the Ed Psch visiting the Private School.

 

I think there are private Ed Pych who you have to pay (no idea of amount) but try the LEA first. The LEA Ed psch often work through the Summer Hols so might be worth trying to contact them tomorrow (Monday)by telephone, if you can , you have nothing to lose.

 

Louise

 

Private ed psych prices vary but on average abou �400-�700, for an assessment, but as someone said if your childs place is funded by the LEA they would surely have to fund this too.

Mrs F x

[llisa32]

Hi - thanks for the replys..J's place is funded by me and dad no.1 at moment and although the pre-prep prices were slightly less than day nursery the year 3 onwards fee's are going to mean serious cutbacks. It wasn't something we'd planned for (going to a private school) due to cost...just something we ended up doing due to lack of other choice at the time. But like I say...the general calm environment, small classes etc mean he has settled there, and parents don't get booted out at the school gates so theres none of that awful 'right you have to go that way into big building and I'm going home' scenario ...

 

I going to really struggle to find cash for an ed psch..particularly as dad no.1 is still not quite accepting of the problems so may not be forthcoming with cash to help pay. I have got J on my health insurance through work, so perhaps theres an avenue there? - worth a phonecall I guess.

[mrs fussy]

And...still with the private school thing..although we ended up in one by accident/default..the environment couldn't be more suited and he's really settled and can stay there until age 16 (slong as we live on baked beans )..could you give me your experiences of private schools and how your children have got on with them?

 

Hi llisa, Sorry i dont really know your story but can i ask how your child did end up at a private schooland why you had to pay for it. Surely if there was no suitable placement another school the Lea should be provididng for this? I would be interested to know your story.

Mrs F x

[Mumble]

Hi llisa,

 

I've taught in both private and state mainstream schools and I went to a mixture of both myself so I'm answering from a hotchpotch of positions.

 

I don't think it's as easy as saying state is better than private or private is better than state. There are good and weaker schools in each category, and what is deemed strong about a school (for instance high academic levels) may make it unsuitable for a particular child. You know your child best and you have to find the environment that suits them best. From what you have said about J's present school, you seem to be doing all the right things. Small class sizes, greater consistency and more rigid routines that you find in some independent schools I think work well for children on the spectrum. On the class size issue, the educational research would suggest that the class sizes in most independent schools (18 - 20) is still not small enough to have any significant effect on achievement. However, I would suggest from my experience that it does make a huge amount of difference - marking 2/3 of the amount of books means, provided you have a competent teacher, spending more time with the marking and talking to children, so you have a better idea of their strengths and weaknesses.

 

Depending on the focus of the private school (I've taught in different ones) the parents can be more accepting of difference which has an impact on the pupils' accepting others. Also there tends (and again this depends on the school) to be a bit more space to let off steam. But schools differ - in one I taught in I had the freedom to arrange my class as I saw fit (which worked) - in another I was forced to do what didn't work, so I guess what I'm saying is it depends entirely on the school.

 

On SEN, again depends on the school. They should have a SENCO and you should know who it is, but they do not have to have had any training (in private schools) - it can just be a named individual who has a filing cabinet in their room with the records of pupils with SEN. Some private schools specialise in learning support (especially dyslexia) and have a unit offering support (usually at additional cost to the parents). With Ed Psychs, the school doesn't have to have any contact and it very unlikely to unless they have some special interest, for instance the first school I taught in has a specialist dyslexia unit and had links with two Ed Psychs (though the parents still had to pay to use their services). The second school I taught in was very poor on special needs (which is a shame because it was actually an excellent environment - very very small classes, specialist facilities for science and art, teachers who were passionate about their particular subjects and a 24 hour curriculum). I had an AS boy in my class who needed to be seen by an Ed Psych - the school gave no help in locating one, the parents had to find one themselves (which when it's costing you a lot of money and you're entrusting your son into their hands, you want someone reccomended - luckily the person they found was excellent).

 

I think you very much have to go with your gut instinct. Being able to stay at his present school until 16 has to be a huge benefit if he is happy there as it avoids upheaval at a difficult time. I would try if I were you to arrange a meeting with his class teacher and the SENCO (together if possible) in the week before term starts (they should be in then). I would use the term 'Aspergers' too as they are more likely to understand this, and try and talk in very concrete terms about what you expect them to do to support J - remember you are in a strong position here as the consumer.

 

Re fees: does the school have any bursary scheme you could look into - this might not be well advertised (if at all) but it might be worth talking to the head/bursar about it. Also, do they have any scholarships (this was how I went to private school - half scholarship/half bursary) - they are not always solely academic, or can be related to one subject so might help, even if they are only for a portion of the fees. Certainly in my case, I wasn't surviving in what was available locally in the state system and had the option of private not been there, I hate to think where I would have ended up. It wasn't all great of course: the physical bullying was replaced with verbal bullying, and I had the added problem that I didn't really 'fit' as a non-fee paying pupil (I was entitled to free school meals and I had the old uniform (they changed the first year I was there) because it was what was avilable in the 2nd hand store, which just made everything more complicated and visible). I think you have to balance up what is best for J and best for you as a family. I would suggest seeing how it goes when you talk through his diagnosis with them and how much they try to help and support/can cope with something unfamiliar. Year 3 is a big change in any schooling and particularly in private when you move from pre-prep to prep and things become much more formal and work orientated and more is expected from the child in terms of being responsible for themselves. I would monitor his reactions and keep in close communication with the school. Does that answer your question? - I can't remember what the question was!!

[llisa32]

Hiya...at the time when J started 'big school' we were unaware that he had any sort of 'condition' we just knew he didn't deal well with change and had some quirky aspects to his personality.

 

We didn't get into our first 2 choice state schools due to them being over subscribed (these were both smaller schools), and ended up being placed in our 3rd choice state infants school. It turned out to be a huge disaster. Despite J looking forward to going to 'big' school...and having been at a small nursery full time for 4 years he absolutely freaked out starting this school. By freaked out I mean abosolutely every morning was a screaming, crying battleground.

 

He had to be physically forced though the classroom door every morning with the teacher hanging onto him for dear life. Others mornings would see one of us having to chase down the road after him when he'd run off. despite him being the eldest in the class etc they would only stick to half days, which being as he only sortof settled/went in by about 10am meant just 2 hrs at school..which wasn;t enough for him to get used to it. They would not budge on that saying they could not make an exception for one child. At the time we couldn't figure out what was upsetting him so much...I was baffled that the teachers were suddenly making comments to me like 'he's very noisy', 'he''s making a fuss for attention' etc etc , when previously there had been none of that behaviour or similar comments from nursery.

 

There was 32 kids in his class, only one of which he vaguely knew...and that coupled with the manic morning routine where the teachers literally took your child off you before shooing him away seemed to be whats was distressing him the most. Class was really noisy...playground was small and there were several classes of kids all same age - I know now he just couldn't cope in that environment.

 

To preserve all our sanity in deperation I looked at private schools cos I couldn't bear to see J hating going to school so badly, plus the comments from teachers was unsettling...they totally did not look at the bigger picture. I found a school that went up to 6th form..parents welcomed in the classroom, small classes etc etc. Went to look round, and decided if there was going to be a school that suited him this would be it.

 

And it was! - after one week doing full school days he was fine with going to school...no more tantrums/screaming/running off etc.

 

And since then I obviously know a lot more about my own child and can see a lot better regarding what he hated about the previous school. And why he got so upset etc. He did 8 weeks in the state infants school and I can honestly say it was the worst 8 weeks of my life. It was like I had a different child.

[Flora]

When my boys first went down the dx route they were at a private mainstream school. The school wanted them to be assessed by an EP and they had one that they used regularly but I had to pay for it; the upside is that there was no long wait and the assessment was thorough... unlike the LEA EP's who (in my own experience) do very little other than protect budgets!

 

Flora

[witsend]

Lisa - have pm'd you

Luv Witsend.