Annea Report post Posted September 28, 2007 I hope noone minds me posting about my situation... I always seem to be miserable lately, and yesterday I was so upset I ended up having a panic attack! Can I just rant for a bit about whats happeneing at present! My daughter A/S is in year 9, she is bright and therefore the school say that she needs no extra help, the thing is she is so very anxious about school, she struggles with the noise and the hustle /bustle, she can't ask for help in class as she is a perfectionist and can't admit she needs help, if she does admit she needs help she struggles to vocalize her difficulties. She is on SA+ but her IEP's are thrown togethr, I have never been asked to review them or sign them, she issupposed to have a pastoral carer but this has not been put in place, she is supposed to hve a quiet room to escape to but this doesn't exist, she has an alert card that she is supposed to show a teaher if she s overwhelmed, but she hasn't the courage to use it.... She was turned down recently for her statement and we have just lodged an appeal... The head wrote me a letter 12 months ago which told me that unless my dd had a statement then she would get no extra help in school because they had no funding for it. SHe was also down to do two trips one in year 7 and one in year 8, these were foreign trips! She was desperate to go, but the school refused to put in place any extra help for her so she had to pull out twice... we have now lodged and had accepted a claim for dissability discrimination against the school. On top of all this My middle dd just started the same school and was so looking forward to it.... but the first week there she was pulled out in front of her friends and asked why she had a non uniform blouse on, the blouse is white and this is all it specifies in the policy. The next day my daughter was the victim of having chewing gum put in her hair by two kids sat behind her in class, the same teacher from the day before asked her to identify the culprit, which she couldn't do because they were behind her, they were also in the same room as her when she was supposed to identify them! Because she couldn't, she was told that she must have had something to do with it and must have been messing around, so she was punished allongside the two bullies... I was so upset that I rang the form teacher whos class it had happened in, she told me she knew my dd wasn't responsible and didn't know why she had been punished, she told me she would get back to me, but she never did! Yesterday my daughter was in yet another class, when this same teacher came into to see her teacher and asked if my daughter was their along with the other three, she went on to say tat these girls should know that all the teachers in school have been warned about their behaviour and they better watch out! (or words to that effect) I am at a total loss as to why this teacher has turned against my daughter and is I feel bullying her! The education welfare offcier has now become involved and is goign to arrange a meeting t try to sort the issues out. AND on top of all this my youngest dd who is as yet undiagnosed, but who has both mobility and behavioural issues had her first IEP written. The IEP refers to her as 'he' and 'himself' and it has been hastily put together. The school had to fill out an OT form for me, and it was filled in shodily at best, their was no information put on their about her needing extra help in spellings focus group etc, plus personal care nd mobility issues she has. I have now asked for a full copy of her school records, and I am going to apply for a statement, so that I can get her assessed properly. My solicitor is having her seen by an OT and toher professionals. I feel like I am drowning!!! My ex has hinted that I am responsible for making problems worse for my middle daughter, because if I hadn't spoken out this teacher wouldn't be targetting her... I wonder how much more I can take on without flipping totally...... Can I also ask, at an SEN tribunal, can IPSEA represent a person or is it best to ask SNAP? I just don't feel like I will manage on my own... My hubby is good really but he just goes with the flow and isn't really that supportive as he doesn't know what is needed of him.... My goodness, Reading it back I think I must seem like a raving lunatic! Does anyone have any light to shine toward the end of this tunnel? Thanks... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mrs fussy Report post Posted September 28, 2007 (edited) Sorry no advice but my heartfelt <'> and i know exactly how you feel and your NOT a lunatic just a caring mother Mrs F x Edited September 28, 2007 by mrs fussy Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pearl Report post Posted September 28, 2007 <'> for you Annea, you have a lot on your plate at the moment. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kathryn Report post Posted September 28, 2007 Annea - wow. Just one of those situations alone would be enough to cause stress - no wonder you're feeling like you do. Rant away! I don't know anything about SNAP and whether they provide reps for tribunals. IPSEA do, but they can't provide a rep for every parent who wants one, so you would have to meet their criteria. It's a good idea to ask about this now while you are still in the early stages of your appeal. Stay strong, and offload here anytime you want <'> K x Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
elun1 Report post Posted September 28, 2007 <'> <'> O is still awake so I cant stay, just wanted to send you <'> <'> Yes contact SNAP, they are usually helpful and will give an unbiased view (in my experience anyway) Elun xxx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Annea Report post Posted September 29, 2007 Annea - wow. Just one of those situations alone would be enough to cause stress - no wonder you're feeling like you do. Rant away! I don't know anything about SNAP and whether they provide reps for tribunals. IPSEA do, but they can't provide a rep for every parent who wants one, so you would have to meet their criteria. It's a good idea to ask about this now while you are still in the early stages of your appeal. Stay strong, and offload here anytime you want <'> K x Ipsea are representing me at the DRC tribunal as I fall into the fanancial category I just haven't been able to get hold of my rep yesterday since the letters came through... I will try him first as it would make sense to ask someone who knows my case(s) Thanks everyone for your support.... I honestly didn't think I could put one step more in front of the other yesterday..... We were so looking forward to my Middle dd goign to secondary... we were thinking at last a child going on to this school without any problems, no reasons to be on the phone all the time etc.... and now this... it really knocked the wind out of me.... Funnily enough I have since made contact with another parent who is having quite similar probs t me concerning my eldest dd AND it's the same school!! so this makes me understand that actually it might not just be me! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pumpkinpie Report post Posted October 1, 2007 Have you written to the governors about this listing examples? It seems to me the sen governor is not doing their job and watching what is going on? I would be puttingthis in writing and complaining to them( copy to the lea). It would be better if the other parent complained at the same time, then they couldnt argue its just you! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Annea Report post Posted October 1, 2007 Have you written to the governors about this listing examples? It seems to me the sen governor is not doing their job and watching what is going on? I would be puttingthis in writing and complaining to them( copy to the lea). It would be better if the other parent complained at the same time, then they couldnt argue its just you! Hi Pumpkin, As it happened I did wrote to the governeors about the difficulties my oldest was having and they didn't even reply to my letter! It is a fairly smallish catholic school, and I wish there was another similar school that I could take them to, but most of the other schools around are much larger and I think this would just add to the probs, and hey wy should I move? I am waiting for the educational welfare officer to come back to me so we will tell you all what the outcome is. Anne Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nic m Report post Posted October 1, 2007 Hope you get some support best wishes Nicola Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Clare63 Report post Posted October 1, 2007 Know exactly where you are coming from, why is everything such a battle, wish I had some answers..... <'> <'> <'> Clare x x x Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Frangipani Report post Posted October 2, 2007 <'> <'> <'> <'> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Annea Report post Posted October 3, 2007 Thanks everyone..... it is really rough here just now... the good wishes are really appreciated... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
