katies confidence

[hev]

katie is fantastic at school,shes never been one to run in and join her friends right away but once i cuddle her she goes in fine,has friends and is very well behaved at school.

the thing is outside of school she is very clingy,we went to a fun day and it took me ages to get her to go on the bouncy castle even though she really wanted to,once she got on there she loved it,she goes to ballet and tap,cries first of all not to leave me then loves it.

when we are at home she wants me in room with her all the timje,calls me constantly,wont like being downstairs if im upstairs even for a bit,will stay with nick on her own

im wondering if any of your 4 year olds are like this?i know shes still really little and needs her mum and im wondering if confidence will come with age?

[Flora]

hev, bless her she's only a littly I wouldn't think it was anything significant to worry about. I don't have a 4 year old (mine are all big and ugly now ..only kidding of course!) but from memory I think they can all be a bit clingy in certain situations. It may be a mixture of just being a little cutsy who loves her mum, and maybe some residual insecurity for the times when things have kicked off with her big brother! She may also be a bit worried that she might have to go away to school one day like Steve. I know Ben has asked me a few times for reassurance that he won't have to go to residential! It may of course have nothing to do with that and that she's just being 4!

 

I'm sure you will be, but the best thing to do would be to keep reassuring her while encouraging her to join in.

 

Flo' XX

[forbsay]

Hi Hev

 

My little girl who is nearly 5 and sounds exactly the same as your wee Katie.....................

[nedgly]

Hi Hev, As I read your post I thought 'wow' this sounds just like my daughter, but then I read your daughters age and realised it must be because of her age. My dd has always been like that and is now becoming even more extreme with it, she is nearly 16. I can't even have a bath without her following me and sitting and talking to me and when we sit on the settee together she just keeps moving closer and closer until I have to ask her if she's trying to sit on my lap. She doesn't like for us to just give her a cuddle though it has to be when she asks for one and when she snuggles up on the settee it's not because she wants a cuddle it's because she just seems to want to get as close as she can. Your dd may just grow out of her lack of confidence, she is still very young. Keep encouraging her as Flora said, it's the best thing to do.

 

Good luck Nedgly

[Enid]

At pre-school where I work Hev loads of them behave like that, if she has always been like that I wouldnt worry, if its just started perhaps it could be anxiety, but she sounds like shes very sociable, so I dont think you have anything to worry about.

[Tally]

I think you're right to encourage her to do things without you. Maybe she would get less upset if you said something like, "remember how much you enjoyed it last week."

 

I remember my younger brother being a lot like that. He would get really anxious if my mum left the room. He turned out fairly normal in the end though! He grew out of it by the time he started school, but Katie has had a confusing time so far, and you haven't had chance to give her as much attention as you would have liked, so maybe she will just take a little bit longer.