Unexpected meeting with social services

[NikkiSmith]

In February I made a huge complaint to social services about their lack of help and it's been dragged out for ages and the local government ombudsman has been involved and all sorts. I'm told it's curently a Stage 2 complaint, which means nothing to me

 

Well on Friday I got a call from a nice chap in the complaints department asking if they (him and the complaints manager) could arrange a meeting with me for Monday......... I explained it was holidays, ds2 is just getting over chickenpox and no they could not have the meeting at my house as 3 boys would be here and it would be chaotic!

 

So they are coming to my parents house (just 5 mins up the road) for 1pm tomorrow and I am flapping!! He wouldnt tell me what they wanted to discuss and I don't get a good feeling about this......

 

What can they possibly say??

 

I don't like surprises!

 

Eeeeek! How do I stop flapping?

Edited July 27, 2008 by NikkiSmith

[Nic m]

Hi Nikki,

 

I don't know why they should be coming, i expect it is to verify your complaint and see if there is a way of resolving it.

The thing that concerns me is that they have not written to you asking for this, or offered you more time to prepare yourself, or given you the reason for their visit.

 

Call me suspiscious but i would be prepared.

have a copy of your complaint letter,

have someone with you,

maybe use it as a time to arrange a more suitable time for this discussion.

Ask if it is being minuted, and take notes yourself.

Let them do the talking....... very important!!!! they have their own agenda, and if they can get you talking and lose your train of thought they will.

I suspect that there is a time limit for investigating complaints and they are trying to organise this meeting quickly before they go beyond that timescale.

Calling you on friday to organise a meeting for Monday is not something they would expect of a professional so remind them of that! nor would they expect a professional to be unprepared for a meeting.

 

Good luck, and sorry for sounding negative but i think if you can stay calm and remember to just listen as much as possible, and not agree to anything until you have had time to think it over and perhaps take advice, then you will be ok.

Just let them explain what they want, and arrange a more suitable time to give you time to prepare is what i am saying, sorry for the lengthy answer.

 

Nic x

[NikkiSmith]

Nic - thank you for that!

 

Everything you said makes sense (which is what I forget when flapping) and seeing it all written down has really helped.

 

I'm off to get all the paperwork piled up and ready to go - have also made sure my mum will be there too (she takes good notes and is very good at staying calm, unlike me.)

 

 

Thank you.

[Enid]

Gosh, wonder what thats about! make sure you post an let us know, I got a social worker from the disabilty team 2 weeks ago, she has been off since!!! back tomorrow, they are allegedly< going to get me some support two days a week in the hols. I told them I need it in the evenings but they said there isnt anyone! heigh ho, good luck. Enid

Edited July 27, 2008 by Enid

[Mumble]

Eeeeek! How do I stop flapping?

I find string normally does the trick. Wrapped three times round the body.

 

If that doesn't work, then duck tape is your best option, but be warned it gives you a free wax on removal - ouch

[lorryw]

Hello Nikki,

I have been through the complaint system (we live in the same County) last year and Nic is absolutely right. They have a time scale in which complaints have to be answered. I also went to the Ombudsman after they virtually ignored my initial complaint.

I think the whole complaint procedure is detailed on the County website. Stage 2 should involve an investigation by an independent person from another County. We had a lovely lady who interviewed all relevant staff and us. She produced a very damming report and upheld all our complaints which was sent to County. However we found that they simply argued with her findings. I was so angry that we went to stage 3 which shocked them. Stage 3 involed a panel of independant people and the staff from County and you and a representative. It was a bit daunting but worthwhile in the end because things improved because of it.

Keep notes, dont be intimidated, have someone with you and you will be fine. Remember its their job to "smooth things over" and If you dont feel completely happy with what they suggest to change things just carry on fighting.

If you want to get in touch PM me.

[JsMum]

Hi, The meeting most likely from your complaint to ss is about this, I was given an investigator officer who was very nice, understanding and listened, most of the complaints were upheld, as I was happy with the outcome, J now has support and we have had help, though this has stopped because of services changes.

 

Make a list of what it is you want, a letter of apology or a face to face meeting,With the team that should be alocated to your family.

 

You could have a list of what kind of support you would like and hopefully this investigator can ensure this goes in writing, so there is evidence if there is any reasons for further complaints, or if someone said oh well you could of said that, oh doesnt it annoy you when they say that, when you did at the very beginning.

 

I think its a positive sign and it may help to get some support for the holidays.

 

Good Luck.

 

JsMum

[NikkiSmith]

Mumble thank you sooooo much for making me giggle!! That definitely helped, but I think I'll pass on the string and duck tape this time.

 

Lorryw - I have PM'd you It seems crazy that they argue with the independent review but atleast I'll expect that now.

 

JsMum - we currently have 2 social workers, neither of them know what they are doing, but I'm having a party cos our original SW is back from a long time of sick and is coming out tomorrow morning (maybe she'll have an idea as to what the meeting is all about!)

 

For the meeting I'm just keeping my fingers crossed and planning to not open my mouth before I've counted to 10.... or more! (If I can) oh and taking a wish list with me, just in case.

 

 

Thank you all.

Edited July 27, 2008 by NikkiSmith

[Nic m]

good luck for tomorrow!

 

N x

[lorryw]

Hi Nikki

Good luck with the meeting.

Loraine xx

[NikkiSmith]

Well...... it wasn't as torturous as it could have been!

 

They just wanted to see what I hoped to achieve by complaining and find out what my exact reason for complaining was (the gawd knows how many letters detailing the issues cleary weren't enough!)

 

Hey ho - they had my agreement to start the independent review over 3 weeks ago and they still haven't done anything about it, but I will now get an e-mail each week updating me with their progress..... so that should be interesting!

 

 

All that flapping for not a lot! Why the blokey couldn't have said that on the phone I don't know.

 

 

Thank you all for all the replies and the suggestions on how to stop flapping - they really are appreciated

 

Nikki.

[smiley]

:wallbash: But that's what we did at the last meeting!!!!

 

<'>

[NikkiSmith]

Oh Smiley I'm sooooooo glad you remembered it too - I was beginning to think that I was so exhausted that I had imagined that previous meeting!

 

Clearly it was very important that the check my answers before I give them to the independent peeps....

[smiley]

I clearly remember making her squirm........

 

Keep going sweetie - they're just trying to confuzzle you! Best thing to do is confuzzle 'em right back!

 

See ya in the morning...... must bring biscuits

[lorryw]

Well done, I know when I had visit from the "suits" one chap talked at me for 15 minutes. In fact I lost the thread of what he was talking about and switched off. He must have been totally convinced I would withdraw my complaint and looked stunned when I said I was continuing.

[Nic m]

Glad, it went well!

 

N x

[bikemad]

Glad it went ok.