Is this normal?

[SuzyQ]

hi guy's,

 

Well it's been a while, so much has happened...DD 14 asd/ Aspergers.....As some of you may remember DD was sent home from school with the school saying she wasn't fit to function in school back in November, County Panel have now decided specialist provision is needed and named four units all of which advocate inclusion even tho camhs says inclusion not suitable for DD....it got worse from that she had been having auditory and visual hallucinations, the early intervention team were due to start assesment, but it got so bad and she was so unsafe as was I that she has been admited to a special hospital, the DR's there do at least agree it's not because of canabis, but are saying its normal for children her age to have these kind of hallucinations, but have changed her meds from abilify to orlanzapine and have now had to increase that dose....What ~I want to know is has any one else had this happen...is it normal?? She has now been there 5 weeks and wasn't allowed home at christmas as she is too dangerous and unpredictable, we have only been able to visit in the hospital for the last 2 weeks, the hospital is about 65 miles away.

 

Just feeling a faliure and rubbish and unsure about the future and everything as I am sure alot of us do at times...

 

Just want some answers...is this normal?

[eggy]

are you in england?

[Enid]

Hi Suzy, it dosnt sound a bit normal to me!! My DS is 13 similar to yours in behaviour, he was away for 4 weeks this time last year, as an emergency placement, I begged for him to go as an in patient april/may time when he was at his worst, life was a nightmare and I was scared of him and for him, but even though I have seen on letters from his consultant that he was 4 tier, whatever that is!"!! no help was ever forthcoming, whatever the reaons, he is now relatively calm and life is returning to some sembalance of normality. I cant believe the y think this is normal, you poor thing with her so far away it must be awful but yet you are having a break from her, hope things improve soon. <'> <'> Enid

[JsMum]

 

 

If it is normal then why are they not letting her go home, this does not sound normal and I would request further advise as been at a hospital 65 miles away will make you feel even more isolated from her, it sounds like there needs to be a meeting and other agencies involved.

 

Sorry your going throw this, Youngminds may help you further they have a parents helpline.

 

Is she on a mental health act, they can not keep her in against your wishes, unless its a mental health act.

 

JsMum

 

[SuzyQ]

Hi guy's, we have a cpa meeting monday morning but my contact at :EA cannot make it and neither can one of the people for SS...not that they have ever met me or DD.

 

What her current DR suggest's is the voices and halucinations are due to apspergers.... as this is normal in adolescent children with aspergers...I wonder .... I don't feel her behaviour is normal AS Behaviour.

It is an awful roller coaster ride and to make it worse I have run out of my citalopram..( much needed) and haven't had if for the same sort of time she has been away as we moved and had to sign on with a new dr but I haven't got round to it not with everything going on...you probably all know what it's like working worrying thinking of everyone and everything other than yourself.

 

They have talked about holding her under mental health act...we have managed so far with them not, but they are holding her under parental responsibility as she isn't deemed Gillick Competant...oh I am learning so much!!!

It sounds awful but...here i go I feel so bad when I admit this.... I don't mind her being there I know its for the best for her I just worry they are not looking into her mind enough and just blaming AS. She is not capable of living in society at the moment as she is so very vunerable and looking how she does doesn't help as she is 5'8 ish and has a figure people would pay a million pounds for!! yet she doesn't understand the older men who have said they are her friends are just grooming her!!

Not only that, I cannot cope with her and knowing the voices tell her to harm me aswell as herself I do not feel safe....so I am a bad mum because I am not sure I will ever want her back to live with me full time. This causes more emotions as I know you all understand.

Just wonder if once she passes a certain age the psychosis will go and leave my DD who just has AS and I doubt that can be answered, but thats what I want to know...do most AS teenagers go through psychosis?

 

[JsMum]

 

 

I have been thinking a lot about your last post suzyq and I am sorry if I was insinuating because she is in hospital is was because she was there out of your or her power, I totally do understand why you have decided to place her in a place of safety and proffessional support, she needs extra support and resources to help her and in time it will help the family.

 

You are not a bad mother, you are a caring mother, one that cares that much you can seperate and detatch for a period to help her in time.

 

It is so hard when we realise we can not do it alone, but none of the nurses or doctors do it alone, they look after her needs as a team and they meet together to plan and arrange her care, they do not do it alone either, you are a good mum for getting her the help she desperately needs and often some parents are ignored, so it is good that the services are listening and seeing she needs extra care and attention.

 

Self harm is a very distressing coping mechenism, it distresses the person but it distresses the family as they cant handle the hurt and pain, but this is her way of coping, her way of sharing the pain, even expressing that pain to others, the self harm will need external councilling and support and a lot of courage and determination on her part too, only when she is ready will this get better, she needs support until then, I came to realise this christmas that I can not do it alone anymore and J will need additional support now as I can no longer keep him safe or keep myself safe when we are struggling with extream behaviours.

 

It is a strength in that we realise that, that we achknowledge that, with that realisation we can do something with it, we can help make sure they get that help and support.

 

I am sorry if my reply before was insinuating you didnt want her at home anymore because I know that is not the case, we love them but sometimes we need a team and not to be so alone in doing it.

 

I hope you feel a bit better today, and I do apologise for any hurt I said.

 

JsMum

 

 

 

[SuzyQ]

J's mum....You did not upset me...we didn't really have choice camhs said they were doing a referal the next day the hospital called saying we could go in following day...so not really a choice and now if I want her out...which I dont cos she is not well enough I think they will section her.

 

the only way to describe it is ...the lights are on but no one is home...or that my DD as we knew and loved her has well and truely left the building....my question is..is it normal for teenagers with AS to be psychotic and hear voices and see hallucinations...self harm is not so bad..well except when it was trying to hang herself..and I do feel a little worried as she wants to stab and strangle me..but it's all in a days work for a mum I guess.!!!

 

CPA meeting today...they are asking for funding for a 52 week a yr placement...so guess it gotta kinda serious, but if thats what she needs so be it

[puffin]

A friend who is a psychiatrist was over at our house the other night. I showed him your post. He said while not common the symptoms that she is suffering are a rare complication of autism/aspergers and that he would probably follow similar treatment as she is currently receiving to stabilise her condition before it would be safe for her or the family to come home.

 

It sounds at least that they have recognised her needs - and hopefully she can get all the help she needs

 

<'> >< <'>

[Enid]

Suzy when I first joined these boards last year in despair I was in the same position as you, My son was in an assessment centre 2 hrs away, He was admitted as an emergency placement, I too was terrified of having him home as none of us were safe, including him, I didnt want him home but did at the same time, we have gone through turmoil and utter distress this last year and at times I have begged CAHMS to place him somewhere but they said he was too dangerous for the assessment centre and too young for anywhere else, we are doing ok at the mo, which is just as well as there was NO help at all apart from that first 4 weeks, but I did feel guilty for the feeling of relief when he wasnt here. <'> <'> <'> <'> Enid

[Enid]

Suzy when I first joined these boards last year in despair I was in the same position as you, My son was in an assessment centre 2 hrs away, He was admitted as an emergency placement, I too was terrified of having him home as none of us were safe, including him, I didnt want him home but did at the same time, we have gone through turmoil and utter distress this last year and at times I have begged CAHMS to place him somewhere but they said he was too dangerous for the assessment centre and too young for anywhere else, we are doing ok at the mo, which is just as well as there was NO help at all apart from that first 4 weeks, but I did feel guilty for the feeling of relief when he wasnt here. <'> <'> <'> <'> Enid