Help needed please

[fishface]

Hi, i have a 7yr old son who has ADHD and ASPERGERS. He is on medication which helps him at school. Our problem at the moment is that he wakes before 6 every morning and then proceeds to shout, sing etc at the top of his voice. If we ask him to stop or keep the noise down he starts shouting more. He has been told he can read etc if he wakes as long as it is after 6. The noise still continues and his elder brother is being woken. Mornings are a difficult time anyway as he is very hyper and argumentative. We have been given meds for him but no one seems to be able to advise us on how you cope with various situations. Any input i would be grateful for. It may seem like a minor problem for some but we have tried various things and they havent worked.

Thanks for your time

 

[bikemad]

No advice as my lad is the same but didnt want to read n run... <'>

[fishface]

No advice as my lad is the same but didnt want to read n run... <'>

Thanks for taking the time to read it anyway x

[Tally]

Maybe a visual chart and a clock in his room would help him understand what he is allowed to do when. I've seen clocks with faces on them, and you can set the eyes to open and shut at certain times. Even if he can't actually tell the time, he could look to see if the eyes are open and know that if they are, he can make noise.

[fishface]

Maybe a visual chart and a clock in his room would help him understand what he is allowed to do when. I've seen clocks with faces on them, and you can set the eyes to open and shut at certain times. Even if he can't actually tell the time, he could look to see if the eyes are open and know that if they are, he can make noise.

Hi, thanks for your quick reply. He has a clock in his bedroom and he can tell the time bless him but im wondering if i can utilise a chart somewhere. Any ideas? please.

[rach04]

my ds cant tell the time so we use a digital clock as he knows that 5 come before 6 etc he still gets up at 4.30 am grrr but he knows that nobody needs to be awake before 7.00 as we have it all on his chart.

[Delyth]

Hi

 

I think I would try a chart and get your son involved in choosing the appropriate activities. I would also go through the expectations a few times the day before, a few reminders. I might expect to be with him the first morning or two, maybe three?, to help him follow the chart and then try and see if he can follow it independently on day three or four.

I might also make sure he has something to eat ready when he wakes up - a piece of fruit or whatever - to avoid the low-sugar-levels-bad-behaviour scenes.

 

Good luck

 

Delyth

[cmuir]

Hi

 

I wonder if a visual timetable might help, indicating what activities that he can do at that time. Alternatively, a reward system for being quiet might help. Social Stoires (google Carol Gray) might help him understand what is expected at certain times - my son used to wake up at 2.20am demanding a bath!

 

Best wishes

 

Caroline

[fishface]

Hi

 

I wonder if a visual timetable might help, indicating what activities that he can do at that time. Alternatively, a reward system for being quiet might help. Social Stoires (google Carol Gray) might help him understand what is expected at certain times - my son used to wake up at 2.20am demanding a bath!

 

Best wishes

 

Caroline

thanks for all your replies. I tried last night and yesterday during his calm times to explain to my son what he can do when he wakes up and what time etc. We went through this several times. Trouble was he woke at 5 and bless him he did play for an hour but then it was "right its time everyone else was up"

Think the chart is def the thing to try next and see how we go. think ill start going to bed when he does to keep up with him lol

trish

 

[Enid]

It is a nightmare isnt it, If we go to bed early then we loose "ME" time, but at least we are not tired the next day, have you tried marble jars, the marbles can be exchanged for cash, he could get 1 marble for every 15 mins he stays in bed after 6! have you tried ear plugs and sleeping with the pillow on your head after a very large glass of wine Well dont bother cos that dosnt work good luck Enid

[fishface]

It is a nightmare isnt it, If we go to bed early then we loose "ME" time, but at least we are not tired the next day, have you tried marble jars, the marbles can be exchanged for cash, he could get 1 marble for every 15 mins he stays in bed after 6! have you tried ear plugs and sleeping with the pillow on your head after a very large glass of wine Well dont bother cos that dosnt work good luck Enid

Lol no i havent tried the wine but i have tried lots of vodka!!!!! Ive tried reward schemes with him and they work for a couple of days then he isnt interested.

Saving for ear plugs and the house next door!!!!!!

Thanks anyway you made me laugh x

[westie]

If you made 2 cards, one with "quiet time/ bed time" and a picture on showing quiet activities and a reminder no singing (the red circle with cross over someone shouting or singing? , and another card with "ok to sing" (or similar, not sure exactly what as "noisy time" may not be helpful even if rest of house up!) and a picture. perhaps if you gave them to him at set times and explain to him when he has the quiet time card he should do the quiet time, then handing him the other card when he is allowed to make more noise..... As involves physical prompt (picture reminder to be quiet), and you giving him the card to say "yes you are ok to be noisy" it may be less confusing. I have adapted this from an idea someone told me about helping your child to share - this was making a card with "WAIT" written on it, and then using it in games involving turn taking. When its the childs turn you hold the card and wait your turn, then when it is your turn you give the child the WAIT card and they then let you take your turn. Its kind of a reminder and distraction in one. I know another parent who has found this helpful too - it doesnt happen at once though!!

 

I also know another parent whose PDA child had sleep problems who used a card with "family time" and "Sam time", before bed time they used to play with Sam doing whatever he wanted until actual bed time time and then swap the "family time" card for the "Sam time" card. This was a visual reinforcement that he was expected to stay in bed without family member being present. They also made a "sams bedtime box" of stuff for him to keep in bed to help him occupy himself until he fell asleep (non stimulating toys/ objects of course!)

 

Or there is a book called "the incredible 5 point scale" which explains a technique used with ASD children, and involves using visual scales (look like thermometers when drawn), with numbers and pictures to explain feelings/ expected behaviours/ controlling emotional responses in certain situations....

 

for "voice volume" it has a 5 point scale, 1 = no sound, 2 = whisper, 3 = conversation, 4 = loud, 5 = yelling. at side of each number is a picture of a face (simple drawings) saying things relevant to voice volume (i.e. the no. 5 picture is saying "HELP" and level is yelling, the no. 3 is saying "hi Tony"). The helper/ parent demonstrates to the child the voice volume at each level, and then practise with the child. According to the book colours and faces on the picture may also help the child to understand differences between each.

 

And then after practise, you then explain to the child that when asking for something they need to ask at a level 3 voice, or you could say in your case to speak in a level 1 or 2 voice in the morning until a parent comes in and says okay to use a level 3 voice......

 

the book covers other scenarios as well. if it is over his bed or something it will maybe help him to remember.. the clock with closed eyes seems like a good suggestion and other visual techniques may work for you. A reward chart in combination with complying with card or scale may be good thing.

 

Good luck I hope you find something to help!

[fishface]

If you made 2 cards, one with "quiet time/ bed time" and a picture on showing quiet activities and a reminder no singing (the red circle with cross over someone shouting or singing? , and another card with "ok to sing" (or similar, not sure exactly what as "noisy time" may not be helpful even if rest of house up!) and a picture. perhaps if you gave them to him at set times and explain to him when he has the quiet time card he should do the quiet time, then handing him the other card when he is allowed to make more noise..... As involves physical prompt (picture reminder to be quiet), and you giving him the card to say "yes you are ok to be noisy" it may be less confusing. I have adapted this from an idea someone told me about helping your child to share - this was making a card with "WAIT" written on it, and then using it in games involving turn taking. When its the childs turn you hold the card and wait your turn, then when it is your turn you give the child the WAIT card and they then let you take your turn. Its kind of a reminder and distraction in one. I know another parent who has found this helpful too - it doesnt happen at once though!!

 

I also know another parent whose PDA child had sleep problems who used a card with "family time" and "Sam time", before bed time they used to play with Sam doing whatever he wanted until actual bed time time and then swap the "family time" card for the "Sam time" card. This was a visual reinforcement that he was expected to stay in bed without family member being present. They also made a "sams bedtime box" of stuff for him to keep in bed to help him occupy himself until he fell asleep (non stimulating toys/ objects of course!)

 

Or there is a book called "the incredible 5 point scale" which explains a technique used with ASD children, and involves using visual scales (look like thermometers when drawn), with numbers and pictures to explain feelings/ expected behaviours/ controlling emotional responses in certain situations....

 

for "voice volume" it has a 5 point scale, 1 = no sound, 2 = whisper, 3 = conversation, 4 = loud, 5 = yelling. at side of each number is a picture of a face (simple drawings) saying things relevant to voice volume (i.e. the no. 5 picture is saying "HELP" and level is yelling, the no. 3 is saying "hi Tony"). The helper/ parent demonstrates to the child the voice volume at each level, and then practise with the child. According to the book colours and faces on the picture may also help the child to understand differences between each.

 

And then after practise, you then explain to the child that when asking for something they need to ask at a level 3 voice, or you could say in your case to speak in a level 1 or 2 voice in the morning until a parent comes in and says okay to use a level 3 voice......

 

the book covers other scenarios as well. if it is over his bed or something it will maybe help him to remember.. the clock with closed eyes seems like a good suggestion and other visual techniques may work for you. A reward chart in combination with complying with card or scale may be good thing.

 

Good luck I hope you find something to help!

Thanks for taking the time to send your suggestions, i appreciate all help and ideas and i will give them a try.

Thanks again

Trish