New to all this

[rao]

Just wanted to say hello. My family and I are just discovering this new world that I am sure we will become rapidly familiar with.

 

We have 4 children ranging in age from 16yrs to 9 months. My 9 year old boy has always had his quirks which are now becoming more obvious as he is getting older. It's amazing how many quirks we have become used to! In the last 3 years his behaviour has become much more difficult to negotiate around which has become a problem both at home with siblings and at school.

 

School have been so far very, very supportive in their time, patience and openness to advice. We have just been seen by a psychologist and are being assessed for an autistic spectrum disorder. The psychologist asked if I was aware of 'aspergers'. I said I was aware of it but did not know that much about it. (In fact most of my knowledge would have been based on 'The Curious Incident of The Dog in The Night Time' which I had felt did not quite fit my son's behavioural traits). However, the following night I went on-line with my partner and dived into the world of aspergers. We were quite overcome and felt we had suddenly been given a handbook for our son!

 

In fact strangely enough I felt like I was also learning about my Dad too! Suddenly the long monologues on history with or without an audience and his garden designed and planted to represent the battle of Waterloo, had some plausible explanation.

 

My eldest son was also seriously hyperactive up to the age of at least 10. We used to have great battles with him, often resulting in him screeching. He has always found great difficulty pronouncing certain words. He was bullied for a long time both in primary and early secondary, but since year 4 he became more outgoing and started to enjoy having friends. He is currently at a mainstream school doing fairly well.

 

However, our 9 year old has lots more traits and it affects everyday life for all of us. He ran away last week, when I was trying to ask him what the matter was. I didn't realise he had run away. He often goes off in a mood, but I usually find him round the next corner. This time he had taken himself straight off walking 3/4 mile back to school. In the meantime I had the town security and the police all searching for him. I was obviously relieved when the school phoned at 6pm to say he was safe and well with them.

 

I am already gaining a better understanding of him and how to react. We are hoping that the formal diagnosis will not take much longer and the school are anxious to move on to him being statemented.

 

Any advice for this stage would be really gratefully accepted. As I say we are totally new to this and all the procedures which we will have to go through. I am looking forward to using this forum to assist us along the way.

 

Thanks for reading, raonaid

[joanne1]

Hi and welcome

 

I am sure you find this forum a comfort as i have. My ds is 13 and we are hoping to get our dx next week. It has been a long road and is taking a while but fingers crossed for next week, then we, like you can get things moving at school!

 

Joanne

[sadie]

hello and welcome

[NickyB]

hello rao and welcome

[smiley1590]

your son lucky to have an understanding and supportive school that wants him statemented and assessed mine never agreed with mym mum thoughts of something else my mum got formal diagnosis of dyspraxia even though thought my mum was being overprotective over me and my problems my mum stuck up for me and carried on beliving that i wasnt typical child i later found out at 14 i have AS too so im grateful to have wonderful parents and words cant begin to sum up how thankful i am to them to keep at it for me! i used to run away for hours! AS does sound likely is he struggling at school?

 

your eldest son could have ,dyslexia n ADHD? that ever been mentioned to you? you getting help and support for your eldest son? alot people with any type LD get especially focused on bullied because more vulnerable! so not uncommon that happens alot i went through it so much! low self-esteem/confidence and affect you years after growing up the sooner the diagnoses come the better myabe get your son into support group and you and read up alot nbout parenting an spectrum disordered children! try get as many support systems (pyschologists,ed pycshs, social workas etc) in place for you and your children the more the better trust me i know from personal experiences!

 

good luck with it all

if you need any more help and advise with this feel free to speak to me again!

 

researching information is good though!

 

take care

KLxXx

 

[Karen A]

Hi rao Welcome to the Forum.We have Ben age 10 who obtained an AS dx a few months ago.

Karen.

[Kathryn]

Welcome to the forum rao.

 

There's a lot of information here, so take some time to browse, and ask as many questions as you want as there's a wealth of experience here.

 

K x

[Clare63]

Hello there, welcome to the forum

 

Clare

[rao]

Hi and welcome

 

I am sure you find this forum a comfort as i have. My ds is 13 and we are hoping to get our dx next week. It has been a long road and is taking a while but fingers crossed for next week, then we, like you can get things moving at school!

 

Joanne

 

Thank you for your kind words. As I am still learning and have withdrawn half the library's books! I don't know what ds and dx stand for. Sorry. I hope that all has gone / is going well for you. How are school being - it sounds like you may have had some problems?

 

Raonaid

[rao]

your son lucky to have an understanding and supportive school that wants him statemented and assessed mine never agreed with mym mum thoughts of something else my mum got formal diagnosis of dyspraxia even though thought my mum was being overprotective over me and my problems my mum stuck up for me and carried on beliving that i wasnt typical child i later found out at 14 i have AS too so im grateful to have wonderful parents and words cant begin to sum up how thankful i am to them to keep at it for me! i used to run away for hours! AS does sound likely is he struggling at school?

 

your eldest son could have ,dyslexia n ADHD? that ever been mentioned to you? you getting help and support for your eldest son? alot people with any type LD get especially focused on bullied because more vulnerable! so not uncommon that happens alot i went through it so much! low self-esteem/confidence and affect you years after growing up the sooner the diagnoses come the better myabe get your son into support group and you and read up alot nbout parenting an spectrum disordered children! try get as many support systems (pyschologists,ed pycshs, social workas etc) in place for you and your children the more the better trust me i know from personal experiences!

 

good luck with it all

if you need any more help and advise with this feel free to speak to me again!

 

researching information is good though!

 

take care

KLxXx

 

Thanks for your response. I am beginning to feel very lucky regarding my son's school. We have friends locally who are at the same stage as us with one of their sons, even seeing all the same faces (psychologists and social workers) but their school is being very obstructive to progress. Yes he is struggling at school. It all went dramatically downhill 2 years ago when he was in year 2. He had a teacher who thought he was a 'naughty boy' and stood him in the corner in front of the class on numerous occasions. She completely misunderstood him. Something which I am glad to say every other teacher before and since has not done, and have actually developed very close relationships with him. His current teacher is going to talk to his class today to let them know about his differences and to encourage more understanding, patience and support. I'm hoping this will make a difference. Often the kids will ask why he makes noises in class, and he should be told off. So this may make a difference to that kind of thing. His teacher is already booked onto a course this friday to assist her with teaching a child with ASD.

 

My eldest probably was ADHD but we never had him diagnosed. We just struggled through the worst years, He is now pretty well rounded but may gain from all we learn through our 9 year old. My partner and I are going on a 2 day intro course for families with an ASD, so looking forward to gaining more support and advice, as well as meeting other people who are also affected.

 

How was school for you once you were diagnosed with AS? Were they then more supportive?

 

Look forward to hearing from you,

 

Rx

[smiley1590]

i suppose in some yes they were more supportive but still not all there yet with awareness and understanding in society eyes especially in education system better than i was growing the pain and hurt i went through and searched to find the kinda 'right fitting' answers as such i still always be searching and craving for missing part of me and my life! weird and strange really! school has never been somewhere i feel 'free' and 'open' college and has started than chances i never ever had at school! but with ed system there time is limited with helping additional needs students unless in specialist unit within the school or special school i been mainstream all my luife and some ways had helped me alot others ways battle struggle everyday but thats reality and i have to know this to live 'near to normal' try be independant and mainstream functioning as i possbily can be and have successful future for myself like every one wants! i just wish my junior' sschool could see what i've achieved and done show them i CAN DO IT! HAHA look who's laughing and whispeing now bout who me and my fam are!

[lynne]

[

Hi welcome to the world of ASD and Asperger.

 

There is plenty of information on the forum and people are always ready to listen.

 

 

[JsMum]

The thing about ASD is that you could have a 100 children, young people and no two would be exact the same, each one will have their own individual traits and features, so dont worry that you didnt see your son in a story about a boy with AS.

 

J Goes to a special school for ASD and though there is similairities they are all different, however he doesnt feel so different to the boys in his class, however in a classroom of 30 he was the only one making noises, distracted, not remembering the tasks, getting distressed because the environement of a mainstream building.

 

My son 12yrs has a combination of disorders and so he really struggles to learn, play and interact and support is essential so it is very good that your school are supporting your son and your family.

 

I went on the NAS confrences and found them really informative and helpful, I use a range of stratagies ranging from learning difficulties to high functioning autism and I feel we have moved forward were as before we where fighting the conventional parenting courses, they were not working because they were not taking into account Js understanding, developmental impairments and learning difficulties.

 

Now we feel we are moving in the right direction, just at a time where he is transitioning into pubity and adolescence as my son started his adolescence at 10 so it can be early for some children with ADHD/ASDs.

 

I hope that this forum helps you feel welcome and that you continue to gain more knowledge of ASDs.

 

A warm Welcome.

 

JsMumxxxx

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Edited March 17, 2009 by JsMum

[Teresa]

Hi and welcome

[sadie]

Hi again Rao. Noticed that you didn't know the meaning of DS and DX and thought it time we let you into secrets .

DS stands for Dear Son as DD stands for dear daughter. Dx is short for diagnosis.

 

There are more abbreviations pinned in the top section of Resources - forum abbreviations....I hope you find this helpful.

There are also abbreviations and explanations in the Jargon Buster in the tab of that name at the top of this page.

 

All the best Sadie