Missing PE kit......again!!!!!!!!!

[Gem]

My 9 year old son has Aspergers and is pretty prone to losing things and forgetting things e.t.c, I was confronted by his teacher yesterday to say that DS has not done PE for 2 weeks now because he has lost his kit. So thats tracksuit bottom, shorts, school t shirt and pumps disappeared into thin air!!!!!

I asked her if I could look for them because they are all clearly labelled and must be somewhere in the school, to which the teacher replied that maybe DS would tell me where he has hidden them because he is only doing it to get out of PE!!

Now I am fully aware of my sons dislike for PE but when I asked him if he had hidden his kit he got very upset and said he would rather be doing PE, because watching everyone is so boring.

My sons teacher told us at the parents evening that she believes that our son is 'playing' on his Aspergers, what does that mean?????

Feeling very disappointed as DS is doing really well in school at the moment and has met some lovely friends, so as a lot of the time he seems 'normal' to his teacher she seems to forget his diagnosis, and when he has a meltdown he is accused of playing on his Aspergers!!

Should I talk to the head? They always seem to close ranks whenever I have tried to discuss any dubious teaching methods!

Anyway, I feel better now I have aired my annoyance!!!

 

[Mandapanda]

My 9 year old son has Aspergers and is pretty prone to losing things and forgetting things e.t.c, I was confronted by his teacher yesterday to say that DS has not done PE for 2 weeks now because he has lost his kit. So thats tracksuit bottom, shorts, school t shirt and pumps disappeared into thin air!!!!!

I asked her if I could look for them because they are all clearly labelled and must be somewhere in the school, to which the teacher replied that maybe DS would tell me where he has hidden them because he is only doing it to get out of PE!!

Now I am fully aware of my sons dislike for PE but when I asked him if he had hidden his kit he got very upset and said he would rather be doing PE, because watching everyone is so boring.

My sons teacher told us at the parents evening that she believes that our son is 'playing' on his Aspergers, what does that mean?????

Feeling very disappointed as DS is doing really well in school at the moment and has met some lovely friends, so as a lot of the time he seems 'normal' to his teacher she seems to forget his diagnosis, and when he has a meltdown he is accused of playing on his Aspergers!!

Should I talk to the head? They always seem to close ranks whenever I have tried to discuss any dubious teaching methods!

Anyway, I feel better now I have aired my annoyance!!!

 

I have had experience like this. My eldest son used to lose his PE kit regularly. He used to be made to put on horrible, smelly stuff from the lost property box, so he certainly wouldn't have deliberately put himself in the position of having to do that !! It gets very expensive when his trainers are in there as well. He's now 15 and much better at being organised, probably for the past 3 years or more. In Junior school his teacher said she felt like he was doing things to make her angry, I had to point out that in my son's case he had no concept of any ability to affect someone's emotions. I'm not sure if he even realised, at that time, that other people had any emotions, or at least different emotions to his. Many children will do things to provoke a reaction but my son just was not capable of that. He would purely react emotionally to situations. He wouldn't know why he was doing something and he certainly wasn't doing it to upset anyone else.

 

Maybe you could find out when PE is and only take his kit in on that day and take it home at the end of that day (maybe the teacher could look after it - could other children be hiding it to wind him up)?

 

 

 

[cmuir]

Hi

 

It's a difficult one because kids with AS are kids after all - they can behave like their neurotypical peers at times (be playful, be devious, etc). I must admit that I don't always find it easy to differentiate between ASD-related difficulties being a little monkey, when it comes to my son. It sounds very much like the teacher has no understanding of AS. Sounds like a better understanding would go a long way, instead of making the easy assumption that your child is playing on having AS. If you feel this is the case, then I think you've every right to express that, particularly as the teacher was as bold to say her piece (must admit, I wouldn't have been too happy about hearing that from her).

 

Caroline.

[Sally44]

My son has hidden things to get out of doing stuff. We went through a phase of him hiding his shoes because he didn't want to go to school. And he can tell convincing lies, to some degree. I'm not saying that is the case, your son may well be putting them somewhere by accident and forgetting them. Could another child be hiding them? This also happens quite often at my son's school. Have you had the talk where you say "I'm not going to be angry if you tell me where your P.E kit is, I just need to know where it is." If he confesses, then you need the discussion about why he is going to such lengths to avoid PE. Otherwise, its a new kit, which you can ask to be kept in the office if it keeps walking - afterall you're not made of money!

Regarding teachers awareness of the issues around ASDs you can ask the head or SENCO about what on-going training the teachers have regarding SEN including ASDs. In our county there are regular training days that teachers or TAs can attend.

[Mum of 3]

Sorry, but this really bugs me. There shouldn't be a possibility that his PE kit has 'got lost' or 'been hidden'...by himself or anyone else. The school should be well-organised enough that stuff that is in the 'wrong place' is immediately returned to the 'right place'!

It always astonishes me how something like a bag of pe kit can just 'go missing' in a school... Have they no cleaners? Do they not notice when there are things 'out of place' in the building? Is the place in such chaos that they have 'stuff' piled up in corners? I am amazed at the mess that some schools are in, and the filthy environments some of our children are spending 6.5 hours a day in!

I would forget Aspergers when you talk to the Head, talk about the difficulties of teaching organisational skills when the school doesn't lead by example...

[bid]

Sorry, but this really bugs me. There shouldn't be a possibility that his PE kit has 'got lost' or 'been hidden'...by himself or anyone else. The school should be well-organised enough that stuff that is in the 'wrong place' is immediately returned to the 'right place'!

It always astonishes me how something like a bag of pe kit can just 'go missing' in a school... Have they no cleaners? Do they not notice when there are things 'out of place' in the building? Is the place in such chaos that they have 'stuff' piled up in corners? I am amazed at the mess that some schools are in, and the filthy environments some of our children are spending 6.5 hours a day in!

I would forget Aspergers when you talk to the Head, talk about the difficulties of teaching organisational skills when the school doesn't lead by example...

 

I guess that's why they have lost property cupboards?

 

To be fair, I think teaching staff have enough to do without tidying up as well.

 

Bid

Edited April 29, 2009 by bid

[Karen A]

I guess that's why they have lost property cupboards?

 

To be fair, I think teaching staff have enough to do without tidying up as well.

 

Bid

 

Hi I did think that too bid.

As a mother who continually has to search for things lost by both sons I think it is a lot to ask of teachers to have any hope of keeping track of stuff for thirty.

Anyway in the scale of things in terms of the things that I would say were important in a good school environment I can think of 101 things that would come above PE kit.

I know the staff at my sons school complain most about parents forgetting things.

One child even managed to explain that she was late two days after the clocks changed because her mum had forgotten to change them.

 

[Gem]

Hi, Thanks for your replies.....after ordering a new kit from the school website, Camerons PE kit mysteriously turned up on his peg upon arrival at school today!!!!

I do think maybe the idea of taking his kit in on the day he needs it would be good, but having said that, its hard enough for him to remember to bring his lunchbox out with him at hometime!

I found an interesting article online yesterday on teaching strategies for children with Aspergers, www.asperger-syndrome.me.uk/teaching.htm

I have printed it up to give to DS's teacher, Im not sure whether it will be appreciated but I dont know what else to do, I know she doesnt like my son, and has made no effort to understand Aspergers. When Cameron first started in the class the teacher asked me how should she teach him, because she had never taught a child like him before.

I felt so stupid for not being able to give her an answer, but its all new to me too, what I do know is you only have to google Aspergers, and there is so much information. I really feel that if I were a teacher I would definately do my own research.

Having spoken to my friend and my sister who are both teachers, I know this isnt too much to ask.

[Mandapanda]

Hi, Thanks for your replies.....after ordering a new kit from the school website, Camerons PE kit mysteriously turned up on his peg upon arrival at school today!!!!

I do think maybe the idea of taking his kit in on the day he needs it would be good, but having said that, its hard enough for him to remember to bring his lunchbox out with him at hometime!

I found an interesting article online yesterday on teaching strategies for children with Aspergers, www.asperger-syndrome.me.uk/teaching.htm

I have printed it up to give to DS's teacher, Im not sure whether it will be appreciated but I dont know what else to do, I know she doesnt like my son, and has made no effort to understand Aspergers. When Cameron first started in the class the teacher asked me how should she teach him, because she had never taught a child like him before.

I felt so stupid for not being able to give her an answer, but its all new to me too, what I do know is you only have to google Aspergers, and there is so much information. I really feel that if I were a teacher I would definately do my own research.

Having spoken to my friend and my sister who are both teachers, I know this isnt too much to ask.

 

Oh Gem, how annoying that must have been !! Still, at least you've spares for next time

 

I know what you mean about the remembering to bring stuff out again. Hopefully this will get better with time, it did with my son.

 

When my eldest was at Junior School I bought several books, some involved ones and some 'dip in-dip out' books about Asperger's children in the classroom, with hints and tips and strategies for teachers. They seemed grateful when I gave them in, but months later denied ever having received any Don't you despair when teachers don't have a clue and don't even seem interested in finding out? The SENCO said they didn't even get training for dyslexia, let alone Asperger's (not sure if this was true - she was a 'funny' woman).

[Lisa40]

My 9 year old son has Aspergers and is pretty prone to losing things and forgetting things e.t.c, I was confronted by his teacher yesterday to say that DS has not done PE for 2 weeks now because he has lost his kit. So thats tracksuit bottom, shorts, school t shirt and pumps disappeared into thin air!!!!!

I asked her if I could look for them because they are all clearly labelled and must be somewhere in the school, to which the teacher replied that maybe DS would tell me where he has hidden them because he is only doing it to get out of PE!!

Now I am fully aware of my sons dislike for PE but when I asked him if he had hidden his kit he got very upset and said he would rather be doing PE, because watching everyone is so boring.

My sons teacher told us at the parents evening that she believes that our son is 'playing' on his Aspergers, what does that mean?????

Feeling very disappointed as DS is doing really well in school at the moment and has met some lovely friends, so as a lot of the time he seems 'normal' to his teacher she seems to forget his diagnosis, and when he has a meltdown he is accused of playing on his Aspergers!!

Should I talk to the head? They always seem to close ranks whenever I have tried to discuss any dubious teaching methods!

Anyway, I feel better now I have aired my annoyance!!!

 

My DD, when at school, frequently lost her kit, her rulers, her pens, etc. She was always accused of doing this on purpose. Unfortunately she had not been DXed at this point and was always put in detention for not having her equipment. Everyday I would ask "Do you have your ....." and always the response was yes, but she always managed to lose something during her day at school. Unfortunately her organisational skills at 16 have still not improved.

[connieruff]

You say you know that your son does not like PE, do you know why? Is it the noise or the disruption of routine by having to get changed etc? Does he have trouble taking his clothes off and putting them on again?

He may well be hiding his stuff, but if he is then you need to find out why he doesn't like PE. My son makes noises and becomes hyperactive when the music starts and they all run around, and then he gets told off and laughed at, so he started to have stomach ache every PE day, he would ask what day it was and if I said Tuesday he woud say 'I dont feel well'

 

[Gem]

You say you know that your son does not like PE, do you know why? Is it the noise or the disruption of routine by having to get changed etc? Does he have trouble taking his clothes off and putting them on again?

He may well be hiding his stuff, but if he is then you need to find out why he doesn't like PE. My son makes noises and becomes hyperactive when the music starts and they all run around, and then he gets told off and laughed at, so he started to have stomach ache every PE day, he would ask what day it was and if I said Tuesday he woud say 'I dont feel well'

 

Hi, He just isnt very sporty so finds PE a bit of an ordeal! I also think he struggles to get changed as quickly as the other children so gets told off.

 

 

[cmuir]

Hi, Thanks for your replies.....after ordering a new kit from the school website, Camerons PE kit mysteriously turned up on his peg upon arrival at school today!!!!

I do think maybe the idea of taking his kit in on the day he needs it would be good, but having said that, its hard enough for him to remember to bring his lunchbox out with him at hometime!

I found an interesting article online yesterday on teaching strategies for children with Aspergers, www.asperger-syndrome.me.uk/teaching.htm

I have printed it up to give to DS's teacher, Im not sure whether it will be appreciated but I dont know what else to do, I know she doesnt like my son, and has made no effort to understand Aspergers. When Cameron first started in the class the teacher asked me how should she teach him, because she had never taught a child like him before.

I felt so stupid for not being able to give her an answer, but its all new to me too, what I do know is you only have to google Aspergers, and there is so much information. I really feel that if I were a teacher I would definately do my own research.

Having spoken to my friend and my sister who are both teachers, I know this isnt too much to ask.

 

 

Hi

 

I may be going a bit off topic, but that's interesting that the teacher asked you how she should teach your son. In a way that's good that she has been open with you. Hopefully the article will be of some use to her (I'll need to look up that website - thanks for that!). Surely the school Educational Psychologist could assist? In Edinburgh, we have VTSS (Visiting Teacher Services) who are made up of SALT, OT, specialist autism teachers, etc. Perhaps some outside assistance would be helpful. It's strange how sometimes external education professionals can spot things, and who knows, they might even get to the bottom of the PE issue?

 

Caroline