picklepoo Report post Posted July 18, 2009 Hi there, my 11 year old son is awaiting assessment for Asperger's. The more I read about it, the more convinced I am that he has it. As a family we've have managed to cope rather well since he began having 'issues' about 3 years ago but as he moves towards being a teenager and going to secondary school, a few of the older/worse behaviours are starting to re-emerge. I think in my complacency, I have gotten into bad habits and am again trying to treat him in the traditional sense, even though i know full well that this leads to heads banging against walls! Anyway, I'm just reaching out as I feel quite isolated. My partner is not my sons father and although supportive, I don't think he quite understands! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mum of 3 Report post Posted July 18, 2009 <'> Welcome to the forum Dealing with my son's behaviour has been one of the most difficult thigs for me and DH. I trained as a primary school teacher and was the manager in charge of behaviour in our very challenginng inner city school, so I couldn't work out why none of my methods worked! After much soul searching, research and forum-reading, we now treat G in a completely different way. It goes against the grain at times, but generally, we try to see 'where he's coming from', and deal with the cause of the behaviour first...we tackle the effect of the behaviour (ie. someone got hurt, or whatever) after the cause has been dealt with. It does look as though he's 'getting away with it' alot, and it's starting to cause difficulties with our NT sons who think they should behave in the same way and get the same treatment (cue autistic tantrums x3!!! ), but what we've found is that he seems to feel more accepted, understood and at ease, and this is having a positive effect on his behaviour so that outbursts are shorter-lived and milder all the time. One word of warning, though, you have to develop a very thick skin-when your child is tantruming in the supermarket and you're hugging him and soothing him instead of telling him off and ignoring him or shouting at him, people tend to give you very strange looks! But then, I think, when I'm feeling cross and angry or stressed and upset, I'd far rather have my DH put his arms round me than shout at me! Maybe everyone should be parenting in a more caring, mindful way! <'> Good luck with your DS. You'll get lots of advice and support on this forum. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NickyB Report post Posted July 18, 2009 Hello and welcome Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
thomastank Report post Posted July 20, 2009 Hello, weclome to the board. I hope you get the help and support you are looking for on here. Good luck with your son's assessment. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites