My son has the same strange dream every night

[dana]

Hi,

I am sorry if this topic is out of place but don't know what to think.

My son told me that he dreams Jesus every night and talks to him. He gives him advice how to behave at school and also how to deal with bullies (to be nice to them). He dreams that he is looking for me but cannot find me and then, suddenly, he finds himself in a strange land where the steps appear that lead to the God's palace. He climbs them and there he talks mostly to Jesus. He smiles at my son and tells him that he watches over him. The last night the Satan appeared and tried to push him from the steps. My son woke up in a terror.

I feel silly even while I am writing all this but I am not sure what to do, what to think,what to tell him. My son is 10 and has dx of ASD and severe Dyspraxia. I just want to add that we, as a family, are not particularly religious although believe in God.

Did anyone had a similar experience? Any advice appreciated.

 

Danaxxx

[JsMum]

He dreams that he is looking for me but cannot find me and then, suddenly, he finds himself in a strange land where the steps appear that lead to the God's palace.

 

Ive had similair dream about my son, were on a bus and he gets off but the doors shut before I get off and travels on with me on it, I loose sight of J and J cant find me either, Im frantic and often woke up, for us at that time it was a period where J was going to attend a residential school, I think it is was some kind of detatchment difficulty I had, we were seperating and I had no choice, the dream was pretty constant until I dealt with the seperation issues, it may be your son is having some detatchment issues, whilst at school maybe, maybe the fact he finds god is a way of feeling safe again, the land giving him a sence of grounding, is his school a religous school? it maybe he really has found god, its a personal opinion and his ability to feel is amazing.

 

Reoccuring dreams are often when we need to deal with a particular problem where not facing or finding it difficult to go throw the process of emotions.

 

The dream changing from jesus talking to him satan pushing him could again be deep unconsous fear, and that he feels like he is gowing over the edge, maybe he feels totally overwhelmed at times.

 

I think your son has a great ability to feel the presance of jesus and god and that is his personal choice, but it is also a sign he may need some one to talk to as well, maybe a child councillor or art therapist.

 

Art Therapy is brilliant for children as they can draw using colour and texture.

 

I dont think there is anything wrong in finding Jesus/god but he is showing a lot of anxieties around you and himself, and fears that are really frightening him.

 

JsMumxxx

 

 

[baddad]

I don't know about your son, but for my son 'every night' can mean a couple of nights in a row or three or four nights a month or anything in between!

 

I think recurring dreams are fairly common, but even more so in childhood ('cos lets face it you've got fewer experiences for the subconscious to warp out of all recognition!), and from my own childhood I can remember several which could 'go either way' (i.e. be nice or horrible)...

My favourites were 'flying', 'finding money in puddles/the gutter' and 'building camps'. I also had two recurring nightmares: The 'running away from demon's but like running through treacle' one (which actually has a physiological explanation - your brain produces chemicals when you are in deep sleep to semi-paralyse your limbs so you don't wiggle about and get eaten by sabre toothed tigers!) and one where i was sent to the headmaster to be caned and fell out of his very high window while trying to watch my friends on the playground

When a toddler, I'm told, I had a recurring nighmare about getting run over by a tractor which would wake me screaming nearly every night...

 

As an adult i have an occassional recurrent dream where I see alien space craft in the night sky. Sometimes this is a really lovely dream, but other times it turns into an 'invasion' and can get quite nasty!

 

I wish I still had the flying dream, though It was BRILLIANT!

 

I wrote it as a poem for Ben (who doesn't have flying dreams, sadly )

 

Flying

 

I don't know when I'm going

I only know next morning when I wake

I've been FLYING!

Up and out, over the rooftops

Over the river toward the sea

Soaring above the tangled treetops

To the lake where adventures unfurl

Like lilies.

 

In the playground I spread my arms

And my classmates watch in wonder

Their shocked mouths forming tiny o's

As my feet leave the ground

And I float over their heads

Into the sunlight

Into the heavens

Like an angel in school uniform.

 

I turn somersaults and pirouette

Ride on thermals

Dance on clouds

Twist and spin like a dandelion seed

Wherever the breeze wants to take me

Landing gently by the bike sheds,

Where the teachers can't see me,

When the bell rings me back to earth.

 

I always know when I've been flying

In the morning I feel so

Light..........

 

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Oh - I also dreamed once that I was eating a giant marshmallow...

 

I'm sure no one needs me to provide the punchline for that old chestnut!

[chris54]

An explanation of what dreams are. (Possible).

Random thoughts going round in our heads, Input usually sound from out side, The part of our brain that make sense of the world for us takes these bits and tries to put them together into something coherent. Time has no meaning in dreams what seams like a dream that lasted for house, when remembered, may all have happened in an instant.

And the last thing is that we all dream its just that most dreams are not remembered.

 

So basically a dream is made up of bit of our experience,(Real life, what talked about at school, home, on telly etc, games you name it, it mite be in there) but put together in a different way. By the very nature of dreams they will be recurring.

 

Now I don't expect to have unanimous agreement on this and I am sure there are others how will put a more significant meaning to it all.

[Jannih]

Hi,

I am sorry if this topic is out of place but don't know what to think.

My son told me that he dreams Jesus every night and talks to him. He gives him advice how to behave at school and also how to deal with bullies (to be nice to them). He dreams that he is looking for me but cannot find me and then, suddenly, he finds himself in a strange land where the steps appear that lead to the God's palace. He climbs them and there he talks mostly to Jesus. He smiles at my son and tells him that he watches over him. The last night the Satan appeared and tried to push him from the steps. My son woke up in a terror.

I feel silly even while I am writing all this but I am not sure what to do, what to think,what to tell him. My son is 10 and has dx of ASD and severe Dyspraxia. I just want to add that we, as a family, are not particularly religious although believe in God.

Did anyone had a similar experience? Any advice appreciated.

 

Danaxxx

 

 

He obviously believes in Jesus and Satan. Just tell him that Jesus is more powerful than Satan and that if he falls or is pushed, Jesus will catch him.

 

If you are non-believers who would feel compromised by such advice, then maybe go down the psychoanalyitical route and try to reassure him that it is just a dream, and that dreams can be just our suppressed insecurities trying to find an outlet.

 

 

 

 

[dana]

Thank you all for your replies.

I liked your poem very much, Baddad. Even now sometimes I dream myself that I am flying but unfortunately never very high. It is usualy over the steps and close to the ground. Still, it is a nice feeling.

My son goes to the church school so maybe thats why he thinks of Jesus so much that he even dreams about Him.

 

Danaxxx

 

[Paula]

Kinda of subject but on subject.

 

When my grandma died who i loved very very much and had a realy close relationship with i had a dream about her a few weeks after shed died.In it we were talking and it was so real during the dream i could touch and smell her as if she was theire and although i forgot what we were talking about when i woke up i fealt shed told me important things......just before the dream ended she hugged me and then turnd away and said you will never dream abuot me againe but i will see you when you get here.I never ever dreamt about her againe in the five years that have since past even when i go to bed and think id like to dream about my gran i never do.Now some would say it was just a dream but i think she visisted me and we did chat and when she left she meant id only see her agine when i died.Some may call it mumbo jumbo but i beleive this.

 

If youre son isnt upset by the dreams then wheres the harm..........i agree with the other poster tell him if the devil pushes then jesus will catch him.Im not a religious person but i do beleive that theres weird forces at work sometimes and we shouldnt mock what we cant understand.

 

 

i sound a bit odd ball now ..........

[Sally44]

If he is having these dreams about talking with Jesus, can he tell you what he is talking to him about?

Repetitive dreams can be when there are things that are not getting resolved.

He may need to know who he can talk to about these things in 'real time'. Eg. if someone is bullying him at school he may need to know who he should go to, or where he can go to in school to get away.

It could be about almost anything really with Jesus and Satan symbolising good and bad, or right and wrong, or friends and enemies etc. If you could get your son to tell you what the subject matter is then that would be brilliant.

Sometimes a pen and paper on the bedside cabinet can help with writing down what happens in dreams.

 

[dana]

Thanks Paula and Sally for your replies.

I do take this seriously and definitely mocking it is not something I would do!

My son tells me every day about his conversations with Jesus. He tells him about his worries at school, ask advice fromHim how to behave, how to deal with bullies. On Friday he got a badge at school for a good behaviour for three days and told that to Jesus in his dream. Jesus told him that it was Him who did it for my son. I told my son that Jesus helped him but that it was my son who behaved nicely at school and diserved the badge.

The fact is that my ds has very difficult times this year at school. His new teacher doesn't really understand his difficulties and putting a lot of preasure on him. I don't mind that she wants him to achieve academically but too much preasure, I think, is not good for him. IT is the right measure that is difficult to find. On top of that, this teacher has a tendency not to belive him when he complains about bulling. His problem is that he finds difficult to express himself and acurately discribe thesituation and in order to do it he changes his story which he teacher interprets as if he is lying and wants to get other children in trouble. He cries to me that nobody believes him and when somebody bullies him he often does not tell his teacher 'because she will not believe him'. She tends to believe other children rather than taking time to find out what really hapened. The example was what happened at the Christmas party. He saw two boys hugging each other in his classroom and said to one of them that he loved the other. He simply stated what he though he saw. The boy didn't like what my son said and started arguing with ds. Some of my son's bullies told the teacher that he was calling the boy names and she throwed my son out of the party. When I came to pick him from school I saw him sitting alone on the floor and talking to himself in the classroom next door while all the other children where enjoying the party! When I asked the teacher what happened she told me that my son was naughty and called the boy names. Than I asked that boy what happened and if ds was calling him names and he said that HE DIDN'T! He even came with me to the teacher and told her that. She was confused but didn't apologised for her mistake.

I am not saying that my son's behaviour is always good (and I always support the schools efforts to crrect it)but I think if he doesn't behave he should be properly explained why he shouldn't and the fact that he finds diffcult to express himself and explain what happens should be taken into consideration (he does that at home as well and I have to be patient to give him time until he finds the right word or sentence, this is also due to his severe Dyspraxia).

Although his year 6 teacher is trying to help him she does not know how and find difficult to understand his difficulties.

I tried to speek friendly with her severel times and keep trying (I would hate to argue with her, so trying to do it nicely since I believe that she wantto help, but it is hard).

The year 5 teacher was much more understanding of his needs and he was really happy then. Now, every day he is talking to me about the holiday in July and talks about it in details and can barely wait the school to finish.

I am sorry my post was soooo long.

 

Danaxxx

Edited January 26, 2010 by dana

[JsMum]

you state that your son is in year 6, you see when I read your first post I thought he was a much younger aged child, the reason I say this, is because especially with my son his development is a lot further behind that his peers, and his interpretations are totally different to true events, and due to his communication difficulties he doesnt get across what he intends to get across, in your post you say last year he had a teacher that understood more, could it be that he/she maybe took into account all of this, where as this year his year 6 teacher doesnt,

 

if I asked you what age do you feel your child is socially, is it then fair that the school are expecting the same social skills as his year 6 friends, on top of his dyspraxia and I say that because I can see a lot of processing difficulties in your post too, which is what J struggles with the most he has Severe Dyslexia.

 

Basically he does sound like he is struggling to express, when he does he isnt been listened too, or even told he is lying, and then when he thinks he is going to get told he is lying tries to explain it in a different way, getting totally confused.

 

Socially my son is around 8-9yrs old he is nearly 13yrs old.

 

JsMumxxx

 

 

 

[Canopus]

This is quite a serious matter. I can vaguely remember my father telling me something about dreams and their interpretations and how certain mentally ill patients he had dealings with had recurring dreams that often involved instances of religion.

[Jannih]

This is quite a serious matter. I can vaguely remember my father telling me something about dreams and their interpretations and how certain mentally ill patients he had dealings with had recurring dreams that often involved instances of religion.

 

 

I don't think it implies there is a mental illness. If it does get me a shrink, now ! Likewise if someone has social anxiety, it does not mean that they are on the ASD spectrum.

 

Someone who is religious, will inevitably have dreams of a religious nature at some stage in their life. Sometimes those dreams may be pleasant and sometimes nightmarish in character, depending on that person's emotional state at the time.

 

If these dreams are such, that they are impinging on life in general, then maybe a psychiatric opinion should be sought, eg. if he is afraid to go to bed or the dreams dominate his waking life, whereby he can think of nothing else. Otherwise just offer your motherly support and listen to him, even when you don't know what to say.

 

 

[Paula]

id forgotten all about this un till a few seconds ago.

 

When my son was aged 5 and haveing a diffiuclt time at mainstream.........he only attended for a year...........he was constantly telling me about a freind called denis norton.....weird name i know.......my son would tell me that this boy helped him ect...........i thought nothing of it untill i found out that there wasnt a boy called this in my sons school let alone class.Then it got weirder i wpoke to his great grandma and said my son had some sort of imaginary freind and told her the name........she went white and said that one of her nephews who was then in his late 70s used to talk about an imaginary frind when he was a young boy and he called him the exact same name..................like i say theres weird forces at work.

 

 

Im not religious or anything.............but whos to say he isnt talking to jesus or maybe a gaurdian angel........if its doing no harm and maybe helping out a bit at school let it be.Once my son moved to a special school and was more realxed and happy we never heard of denis norton againe...i guess his job was done.