7 year old says 'brain malfunction'

[babnye1]

My son is nearly 7 and is undergoing assessment for ASD. It has been acknowledged that he has motor coordination difficulties and Aspergers looks likely.

 

it has taken along time to learn how to dress himself in the morning but he has been doing this for a few months now. However, for the last two days he has looked at his clothes and said 'brain malfunction' and then got panicked because he doesn't know what to do.

 

This morning he said 'it's all gone from my brain, I can't remember it'.

 

He has been quite relaxed this week so it was a bit out of the blue. I was encouraging and just helped him but it was worrying.

 

Anyone had anything similar?

[Tally]

Maybe he is becoming aware that he has a neurological condition that makes him different, and is disappointed that he struggled to dress himself.

 

A chart about how to dress himself might be helpful. You could even illustrate it with photos of himself performing the various stages. It would help him be more independent than if he has to ask you to help him or remind him how to do it.

[babnye1]

Maybe he is becoming aware that he has a neurological condition that makes him different, and is disappointed that he struggled to dress himself.

 

A chart about how to dress himself might be helpful. You could even illustrate it with photos of himself performing the various stages. It would help him be more independent than if he has to ask you to help him or remind him how to do it.

 

That is a good idea. I thought he had cracked it but perhaps we need to go back to basics.

 

It is sad to think that he is aware that he needs help and frustrated by it.

[Meethoss]

Turn it on its head. Explain to him that it's fine that he has issues with some things and then find things that he's good at and point them out. You can say "Yeah, so you're not great at this, but you're AMAZING at this!".

 

As far as I'm concerned EVERYONE is different and has their own issues, so just focussing on the negatives is likely to only reinforce them. I think I was lucky to grow up without knowing I had AS because I never let it limit me. I never stopped trying at something because something or someone told me I couldn't do it. In fact I'd say I've probably become much better at those things for it (due to my stubbornness).

[justine1]

My son(6) is the same in the mornings,it takes ages to get ready he can run around naked for two hours or more if I left him to it.He does forget what he is meant to be doing,so often I just get him washed and dressed.

 

He also says "my head is not working" and often hits his head with his hands,especailly if its been a long day.When he went for his first assesment he said "they going to find out whats happening in my head"

 

I think its good to encourage him to dress on his own but in my situation it doesnt always work out and I do have to dress him,he doesnt ask me to do it he enjoys getting it done himself but we need to be out the door before 10am

I think if he was olde (13+) it would be a different story and on weekends he takes as much time as he likes(usually 2 hours)

[Sally44]

Yes my son says stuff like that.

 

I found a very useful website about difficulties like this, which are usually put down to problems with executive functions eg. organising, sequencing, planning etc. Its called www.schoolbehavior.com then follow the links at the bottom of the page.

[Sally44]

You want the link at the bottom of the page which says "conditions".

[julie1]

my son use to hit his head when he was around6/7 then one day while we were sitting at the table he spoke to everyone telling them they had 5 brains each when he got to himself he said he only had 1 brain and it doesnt work. This was heart breaking but he showed us that he needed an explaination on what was happening to him and why he was different.

[JsMum]

It could be difficulties effecting his memory, J has short term memory difficulties, so look at stratagies and training techneques that help to keep the memory working, games such as a number of items on a table, get him to look at them and try and remember as many as possible, then cover the table up, then ask him to try and remember the objects, or if he has difficulties verbalising, have picture symbols.

 

Jigsaws are good for the brain too, as are puzzles, the wood puzzles are great, and maybe if you have them in your area, Brain Gym, yoga bugs and other exercises that help the brain, a referral to the OT may be a good idea to look at ways to help improve his memory and co ordination.

 

Another good one is if your right handed, for simple tasks use the left hand, so brushing teeth use your left hand or picking things up, writing, drawing ect.....

 

JsMumxxx

 

Edited February 3, 2010 by JsMum

[babnye1]

Thanks guys. It is really helpful to hear what you have to say. Meethoss, you are right. It is so easy to get caught up in negatives. It is best to just get on and help and not make too much of a fuss.

 

It was just worrying as it seemed like this was something he had mastered and then it had just been lost from his head. It almost feels like dementia, if that makes sense.

 

Sally, thanks I will check the site out.

 

Julie/Justine, it is horrible to hear them say things like that about themeselves isn't it?

[smiley1590]

i struggled alot with this when younger getting myself dressed properly in right order due to dyspraxia messing things up in my head so frustrating and annoying i can now do this and also brush and wash my hair with me practice and enough time so didn't feel rushed and in blind panic /anxiety to do it quick my parents used to help me alot to get ready as find it so hard used to try so much to get it right used make me mad with myself!!!

 

it just break down task into littler chunks for him to process successfully as he is growing and seeing his friends that what probably making him notice the ' difference' in him more and battles he faces everyday ...... i know i did that's for sure and hard to accept sometimes harsh reality of it all really! does he asks questions about his conditions or leave it at the word??? maybe he wants to know more about them that's why he says it try understand himself and his life better??? just an thought an idea may be completely wrong!

 

years later found out the difference wasn't just dyspraxia as me and my parents ( family) thought all along also aspergers there too!!!

 

what about picture cards with showing him what to do to get dressed in what order etc and words underneath simple instructions to help guide him and reassure him they it process he can physically follow and see how it is done it right correct order this give him a visual cue to pick up on each time he does it and also help prompt and practice his own skills to improve and develop further or a written checklist of what order clothing goes in then once done one part of each thing ticks it off AS/dyspraxia peeps work better with visual cues guides to help and reassure them along the way of following out a daily task /routine that has to be followed through regularly!!!

 

good luck

 

XKLX

[Meethoss]

I never had these sorts of problems when I was young as far as I can remember; but that said I don't remember a great deal from my childhood, just random things. However I do have times when I just seem to have no clue what I'm doing, but then lots of people get that, right? I often need some sort of list whether it's on paper or in my head (just a few items, more than 3 and I struggle) to get things done, and if it's something to be done in work I often need specific detail (I've currently got a situation in work where I don't have enough detail and it's really pissing me off!).

 

The way I usually deal with this is to make things the way I need them to be. Even if it seems like you can't, there's often a way to change a situation to your advantage and I think with our difficulties this is the way to deal with them and actually what can help us get ahead.

 

Sorry I probably drone on (if anyone has noticed my other posts) about this, but I really think that whilst we have some disadvantages from "neurotypical" people that we also have some advantages and it's just a case of dealing with the former to get by and of embracing the latter to excel, rather than dwelling on our issues.

[joybed]

Both of my boys gave difficulty dressing themself, Piers has not got the concentration, on a weekend i leave his clothes for him but 9 times out of ten he just doesn,t do it and is still in his PJs till quite late when i have to intervene. On a schoolday I do physically dress him as we are on a tight deadline this will be the next thing we tackle after sleeping. Marcus is 14 and I can,t remeber at what age he started to get himself dressed but I do know he still has problems, I leave his clothes out for him on the banister and he can then dress independently but if I forget something he cannot find it despite knowing where his things are kept and what he needs, he just becomes very anxious and says i have ruined his day. We are working on this by encouragiung him to get his own uniform ready on a night when he has more time and therefore not stressed, this is slowly coming together. If not a schoolday Marcus will choose very innapropriate clothing if left to his own devices, shorts when snowing, uncoordinated clothing once dressed he will not undressed too much hassle for him. He has no pride in his appearnace at all and ofetn leaves the house looking like a tramp. Piers clothing choice is very much decided by his current interest at the miment if it is ben 10 or spiderman he will wear it.

My daughter also is very bad at getting ready for school on a weekend she can change her clothes 5 times and leave them strewn all over the house but it is impossible for her to put on her uniform.

I would second the picture schedule works really well although the pictures tend to dissapear in our house. Marcus also claims he is too old for a visual timetable and flatly refuses to use lists or reminders of any type even though he knows they help him.

Edited February 4, 2010 by joybed

[babnye1]

Thanks Meethoss. I completely understand what you mean about advantages as well as disadvantages and that not dwelling on the problems is a good approach. That is why the right school (one which encourages the child's strengths while accomodating the difficulties) is so important.

 

Joybed - thanks for your post. I recognise alot of what you say in ds. Loves staying in pjs all weekend (if possible). I will look at doing a picture schedule. Today, just sitting with him, and handing him the next item to put on, while saying 'this one next' worked fine. I will see how he goes with that and will draw up a schedule for doing it himself.

 

Thanks