JeanneA Report post Posted August 6, 2011 (edited) Hi all, my hubby and I are just getting ready to go and see Glen today at the home, we are taking with us a brand new bike for him to have there so he can ride about the grounds around the home as it is a massive area. Hope Glen will be pleased to see us and of course like his bike. We are also hoping to take him out for lunch to Mc.donalds. I will let you know how we get on. Edited August 6, 2011 by JeanneA Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bid Report post Posted August 6, 2011 Have a lovely day, all of you! Bid Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
oxgirl Report post Posted August 6, 2011 <'> Hope you all have a really nice day. <'> ~ Mel ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lisac Report post Posted August 6, 2011 I hope you have a great day Jeanne and fingers crossed for that smile Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dekra Report post Posted August 6, 2011 Hope he loves the bike and you have an enjoyable afternoon with him Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tally Report post Posted August 6, 2011 McDonalds and a new bike is my idea of a good day. Hope you all enjoy yourselves. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JeanneA Report post Posted August 6, 2011 Hi Glen liked the bike and rode around the grounds on it for a short while. Hubby and I took him to Mc.donalds for lunch but he appeared anxious all through it and we ended up eating the rest of lunch in the car. We then took Glen for a ride, but he seemed to want to go a different way?? When we got back to the home Glen became aggressive towards staff and asked me if he could go home We said 'next weekend you are coming home Glen' but that didn't help. After we got home I rang the home and they said Glen had settled down but it took nearly 2 hours. So although it was nice to see Glen it seems visiting him at the home perhaps isn't such a good idea as he thinks he will be coming home with us. Next weekend he comes home from Friday until Monday so I hope he will be ok then. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lisac Report post Posted August 6, 2011 Hi Jeanne,maybe visiting him in the home confuses him, so maybe just having the home visits , for now anyway, might be a better solution. Aw bless him, x Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JeanneA Report post Posted August 7, 2011 Hi Lisa thats exactly what hubby and I said last night. I think we will have to stick with seeing him one weekend a month when he comes home and see how that goes. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
oxgirl Report post Posted August 7, 2011 It could be that he'll get used to the pattern of you visiting and going home and then him coming home a couple of weeks later. Once it's established in his mind that that is what happens he might, accept it and settle into it. Does he have visual timetables at the home to try to explain to him what is happening? I know it must be upsetting for you, but maybe if you do persevere he will settle into a routine and come to understand that you visit and then go and he stays, whereas if you stop visiting now and then start again at a later date, it might confuse him further as there won't be a pattern he can hold onto. Does that make sense? ~ Mel ~ <'> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JeanneA Report post Posted August 7, 2011 Hi Mel yes it does make sense what you are saying, but I'm just not sure at the moment. I think it will be a good idea to discuss it with the home manager at the meeting we have on the 19th and get her opinion and take it from there. The last thing we want to do is upset Glen when he's been settled for some time at the home we would rather 'back off' if thats whats needed for a while. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lisac Report post Posted August 7, 2011 Thinking about it, it does make sense what oxgirl is saying. To change what you've been doing from the beginning, now, could lead to problems in the future, as of course, you are going to want to visit him there in the future. So maybe getting the home to work with him regarding 'you visit-you leave'could be the way forward.It is a hard one as you dont like seeing him anxious, yet regular visits from you are going to be his reality. Big love xx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JeanneA Report post Posted August 7, 2011 Hi I rang up this afternoon to see how Glen was today and was told that he had been more settled although he did self harm (hit himself a few times on his head) this morning. He did go on the swings in the grounds of the home with the other young people so that was good to hear. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Enid Report post Posted August 7, 2011 Hi. just sending support, really feel for you, it just needs time and it will settle down, so hard for all of you in the meantime though. keep strong love. xx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JeanneA Report post Posted August 8, 2011 Hi Enid thanks so much for your kind words. It is tough it really is. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites