My self esteem is now really low!

[Gold MD]

Since I lost my key worker, life has been highly depressive and all I think about is her. I last saw her yesterday in Number 6 and outside the office where I live, and also when I was on a bus, I saw her walking home. I'll never get to work with her again. I just know it. I've been told many times already that I won't work with her again.

 

I joined some dating sites. Maybe I'm just not attractive at all, but no woman responds to me, unless I have a go at them for being fussy, but only then do they respond. I had women blocking me on Plenty of Fish just for contacting them being nice. People are way too fussy these days with looks and whatnot.

[oxgirl]

Sorry to hear you're feeling low, Gold MD. It probably is for the best that you will be working with another key worker, maybe you had become too attached to the previous lady and this isn't always healthy. Try to look on it as a move forward onto new things and you will soon get over her, hopefully. I'm sure you are attractive to many women, but it is not easy meeting people. I wouldn't take it too personally and just persevere, meeting lots of new people until you find a relationship that works for you both. It could take time, but try to be patient and not get too upset when women aren't positive as they are looking for sometime particular too and just because you aren't right for them doesn't mean you won't be right for lots of different girls.

 

Good luck and try to stay positive.

 

~ Mel ~

[BelLocke]

I've read some of your other posts about your key worker, and I agree with oxgirl when she said your attachment was probably not very healthy. It's easy to fall for someone when we're in such close contact with them all the time, but carers are professionals and must maintain professional relationships. Don't take it as a knock against yourself. Appearance and attractiveness are subjective from person to person; for every rejection you experience, there is bound to be someone out there who would be more than happy to get to know you better.

 

I know it's a cliche to say this, but in order for others to love us, we need to love ourselves. You sound a bit depressed, and maybe instead of pursuing a relationship, you should focus on building some friendships and improving your self esteem up a bit. Find groups (online or in real life, either is good) who share similar interests and just have some fun by meeting new people. This is a lot easier said than done (this is coming from one of the shiest people in the world - me!) but I think it could be better for you in the long term than stressing over finding "the one."

[Gold MD]

It's just that she acts really uncomfortable when I see her around and I doubt she really forgives me either. She doesn't smile any more. Although the way I've behaved over the situation hasn't been great, I've felt majorly frustrated. Now the staff are offering to do a better job to keep me posted about things, which is merely because they want to smooth things out in case I accuse them of doing the same poop again.

 

Bit late now for Joanna and Sara, though.

 

As for social groups...I was on a Meetup group for horror film fans before and I'd like to get into that again. Birds of a feather block together and all that malarkey.

[BelLocke]

It could be that she's uncomfortable because she knows you have feelings for her that she doesn't reciprocate, and perhaps she doesn't want to lead you on or give you the wrong ideas by being nice, smiling, etc. I've been in a similar situation myself (admitted to my friend that I liked him, and he literally RAN away!) and I know how painful it can be. Sometimes though, you just need to let people go for your own sake. The horror movie group sounds like a great idea; I'd definitely go for it!

[Gold MD]

Sadly, from what a guy on sleep over was telling me last night, Sara could get moved to another team supporting other folk now, as people know I've been mentioning how seeing her around at times is upsetting me. They know I'll most likely never get to work with her again. I'm distraught as I felt I should have got another chance. Unfortunately, I think they've all totally gathered I'm obsessed with her in particular, as well as Joanna, so they won't let it happen. It's so hurtful.