Advice needed

[Flora]

Hi all,

 

I wanted your opinions and advice on something.

 

It is my 11 yo AS son's class turn to go swimming this term. He just doesn't want to go. He finds the whole experience absolutely intolerable; from getting to the bus, the changing rooms, the noise, the smells and the awful cold damp feeling he has all day (he never dries himself properly!). I have had a terrible weekend with him where he's been panicking and having wobbler after wobbler regarding the Monday morning swimming lesson. Today I took him to school without his swimming kit (it was either that or him not make it to school at all). I asked if he could be excused and maybe do something more beneficial to him, like reading or extra study/homework etc. The headteacher, said no, he has to go and watch the whole class swim and isn't allowed to take a book or anything. I didn't have time to argue the point this morning; but I feel very strongly that they are in the wrong here. On average he has about 4 days off school each month just to cope with the stress of school, and the way I see it is that if he is going to be forced to swim he'll end up more stessed which equals more time off school.

 

If anyone has any thoughts and advice I'd be grateful to hear it.

 

Lauren

[Tez]

Lauren I agree with you. This is directly related to his disability and therefore it is not unreasonable to expect them to make adjustments. Maybe the Head teacher isn't fully aware that the issue isn't just whether he swims or not, from what you are saying the whole process from going on the bus, to the swimming pool environment causes him sensory problems which make him ill, although, I suspect the real issue here is one of supervision if he remains in school, but this should not be your problem.

 

I would be inclined to put your concerns in writing to the head master and ask him to give you a response in writing within x days stating how he proposes to deal with the matter. If your son has regular contact with a doctor who knows of his sesnory problems I would ask them to support you by writing to the school backing you up.

[Suze]

Can totally relate to this as my son feels exactly the same.His lessons don,t start till after christmas. Perhaps write to the head, STRESS!.............the impact this has on him , can a gp/ physch/ pead/ autism advisor back you up?If the school still won,t listen, do what you need to do , either don,t take him in till after the lesson, get him dissapplied, good luck Suzex.

[oracle]

Lauren in the Ofsted report they actually mention that if a child is either kicking off or is not gaining anything from a lesson then the school should do something about it. I will mail you a copy. I have actually given this to our Autism Outreach Team and now that they have used it.

 

The only thing that your son is gaining from this is stres and it's no on.

 

Carole

[Kathryn]

I sympathise entirely - I find the whole experience intolerable too and I'm an NT adult! It must be a complete sensory nightmare.

 

There is plenty of time for your son to learn to swim in a pleasanter stress free environment (like on holiday at the beach ) - there is no reason why he should be put through this torturous experience now.

 

K

[Flora]

Thank you for your responses. I think I have enough amunition now to push for him to do something different when his class is swimming.

 

Carole, I'll look out for the ofsted thing you mentioned.

 

I've sent a letter to the school with the whole picture detailed. Although if my experience is anything to go by they'll not acknowledge it in any way, shape, or form.

 

Either way though, I'll keep him away from swimming if he continues to react like he did this weekend.

 

Thanks again for all your great advice.

 

Lauren

[mum22boys]

I felt very angry with your sons school's response. no doubt you did too!

Obviously his head teacher has no experience of As at all. I am sure if your son is anything like mine that even going to the swimming pool with the class would be too much of an ordeal.

I know how stressful it gets when M can't face doing something. I just feel angry for you that the head is so ignorant.

 

Hope the letter does some good.

 

Good Luck <'>

[lorryw]

Hello Lauren and Happy Birthday

I sometimes read these threads and cant believe what I am reading. Schools really are there own worst enemies. I work in a school and children who have bone fide reasons for not swimming simply stay behind in another class. No fuss, no problem. As for not being allowed to sit at the poolside with a book and watch, well words fail me. It would be the perfect way to de-sensitise him and he may eventually decide he would like to give it a go. My own son loved swimming until he witnessed an accident and it took us a long time to get him back in. Lots of visits, getting a bit further into the building and eventually back into the water but it was along drawn out process. Can I suggest you write to the head explaining the situation (and keeping a copy yourself) if she still wont playball then contact the LEA.

Take care

Loraine xxx

[barefoot wend]

Lauren

 

I agree with every other post in that there is no way that your son should be forced to endure swimming - it must be a complete nightmare for him.

 

Barefoot

[lisann]

Hi Lauren Yes I have to back up everything which has been said I would tell the school he isn't doing swimming and give the list of reasons they do have to listen to you.

 

Lisa x

 

Good luck