bad week :o(

[jewels]

Hi there,

OMG i think im going nuts!

Ive been having such a bad week/ 2 weeks (not sure now LOL)

I had a saturday job (as well as my week job) to get some xtra xmas cash but after about 8 /9 weeks i gave it up (last week) as i was coming home and everyone would be stressed out (specially hubby) as he didnt really know how to handle Liam (or the rest of them to be honest LOL) and it would just be be like a warzone and i thought at the end of the day its just not worth it.

 

Anyway ive only been in my other job about 10 weeks (got the job a week before Liams diagnosis) and i have been regularly told off for being 5 mins late and ended up in tears yesterday as the last week has been a nightmare as Liam is getting excited about xmas (i think this is what it is) and has been driving me up the wall.

He refuses to get up for school, refuses to get dressed and even when he does he will come thru in his day to day clother (even filthy ones) and wont take them off to get his school stuff on, then trying to get him out the door is a complete nighmare again as if he has something on TV he will want to see the end ...OR he will hide.

Ive found him in cupboards, under his bed, in his brother/sisters room, bathroom ect.. im lucky if i have been leaving before 9.

Im at the verge of quiting my job as i feel my boss just doesnt understand or just doesnt care and i cant go on like this.

 

Im starting to feel ill and im on the brink of a breakdown i think .. yesterday was the 1st time ive cried since way before Liam's AS diagnosis and even then it wasnt a really good cry as it was in the work's loo's.

 

Anyway (again) my 7 1/2 yr old daughter is showing very distinctive sings of the same behaviour as Liam but cant work out if she's just copying or (as the GP said "wants more attention.")

She used to sleep with the light on, be reasonably good at school ect.. Now she says shes afraid of the dark, talks like a baby, her school work has fallen drastically (says her words back to front eg. bad/dad, no/on, ect.. b, p, q & d's are almost impossable for her to do now, she steals food (especially chocolate and crisps) and im not getting thu to any1 as they say they want to deal with Laim 1st.

 

Monday was a half day at work, was going home to have a few hrs (i feel completely exhausted) but got a call from the high school saying my 12 yr old hurt her thumb playing basketball in PE, took her to hospital and she had broke her thumb, so now she has a cast on and i have to help dress her and do her hair as well as everything else in the mornings.

 

Today went to see 7 yr old at her nativity play, then had to take my 7 yr old to the podiatrist as she has flat feel (like Liam) and suffers terrible cramps in her legs and shin splints and with be screaming in pain at all hrs in the morning 2,3,4am so they have put in special insoles and if that dont help (todays appointment) are going to see about special plastic type things in her shoes to make an arch.

 

Also was thinking if any of you use the gluten and dairy free diet and if you see a difference?

Cant see Liam going for this tho as he is so fussy with food as it is and will very rarely try anything new or anything he doesnt like the look of.

 

Still not been xmas shopping, or put tree or decorations up and time is getting on so fast but all i want to do is hibernate until .... well im not sure when, maybe a few months

 

Anyway this is my therapy for the moment LOL, who needs to go see a specialist

Ive been on antidepressants for over 3 yrs but to be honest i cant remember the last time i took them as i just cant remember to take them and seem to be consentrating on other more important things. Will need to remember to fone Dr. tomorrow as i know i cant go on like this and the kids will all be off from the 23rd - 9th jan and will definately need therapy after then LOL

 

Oh the OT saw Liam at school yesterday to do yet another assesment, i spoke to his teacher today and he said he was ok apart from the last 20 mins or so when he had used up all his consentration and began to be a bit of a terror.

She gave him a cushion with knobbly bits on it and a slope to make him sit properly and more comfortably and to try stop him swinging on his chair and try and sit for longer periods, he also told me they were going to give him a sloped board to put on his desk to make him write better and more easily so that should come after the year.

Also ... he has been complaining his eyes are sore and watering/stinging and he keeps staring at the strip light then says his teacher looks purple and has streaks coming out his face so his teacher said i should take him to the optitian again (already did but they just said his eyesight was fine and he didnt need glasses

 

Anyway thats my rant over for the moment, now going to get the dinner organised and try to get Liam and his sister's homework done

 

Hope your all well and everyone is doing ok.

Take care

Luv

Julie xxx

[oracle]

Julie my chicken is burning - not Baddads sausages. But if I were you I would pm Ian Jordan about what your son is telling you about his vision. He has been brilliant and gave me lots of information about an eye condition that my son has. Ian is a top level researcher in vision and sensory issues. David has always complained about seeing coloured lights and arcs around things.

 

Carole

[jewels]

Hi carole,

Thanx for your reply and i will pm him as soon as ive got some spare time when the kids are in bed.

 

Thanx again

take care

luv

julie xxx

[mel_jayne]

<'> <'> Sorry to here things aren't going to well.

Take care.

[lindy-lou]

aw you poor lass i hope you can try and get some help,sounds like a really tough time,im with you on the hibernating thing though,a few days would do me just fine,peace,quiet,no stress and some sun,sea and sangria *daydream daydream*

 

have a <'> you need one

 

[jewels]

Thanx again for your replys and words of comfort. a big <'> is just what i need at this moment.

Hopefully things will get better (like they always do) and i'll be back bouncing about again in no time. I just need to try and chill out.

 

Thanx again, its so much better than therapy and so much cheeper too LOL

Hope your all well and doing ok.

Take care

luv

julie xxx <'> <'>

[sue45]

I was exhausted just reading what you're dealing with! Oh please please try to find time to be kind to yourself. I'm also on anti-depressants and like you, started to forget to take them regularly and wondered why I wasn't coping. A friend reminded me (gently enquired how the tabs were working ; which reminded me I should actually be taking them every day - not once in a while when I remembered) and since then I've made an effort to take them every day and feel calmer and more in control and able to see what's best. It's so easy to forget about yourself when you're trying so hard to keep everyone else on track. I know it's kind of an awful tag of responsibility - but looking after yourself is at least as important as looking after everyone else.

 

I wish you well and send lots of <'> <'> <'> <'> <'> <'>

 

Take care.

 

Sue

 

x

[Flora]

Hope you are feeling better about things today. <'> It sounds like on top of everything else you could really do without Christmas <'> Something has to give. Do go and see your GP and tell him/her everything you've told us. I don't want to jump the gun but it sounds to me like you could do with being signed off for a couple of weeks. Life can be a rollercoaster and it sounds like you are on a particularly bumpy ride at the moment.

 

I know it's hard but you really need to be easy on yourself; don't try to be super woman. You need time to come to terms with your sons dx too. It sounds like your son's school is taking his dx seriously and doing lots to help him which is a plus.

 

Take care of yourself as well as everyone else and try to slow things down; a trip to your GP is an essential start in that process.

 

Let us know how you are.

 

Lauren <'>