hev Report post Posted January 5, 2006 before we moved here we lived on a not nice estate,my mum still lives there and steve stays with her every friday night,last time he was there he got talking to some kids he went to school with about 10 of them for a few hours there was no trouble they dont bully him but they do cause trouble on the estate,ive posted in the past he has no friends but he wants to meet them again tomorrow night and he cannot understand why im unhappy about it,he feels like im punishing him and he hasent done anything wrong,in a way i think i am i know i have a problem with worrying about him,i dont know whether to see how it all goes and if theres trouble stop him seeing them but then its on mums doorstep and shes 70,im thinking is it more my problem than his,i wish he was a toddler for ever theres none of these worries then!!hes so desperate to be accepted and i dont know if im holding him back Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
loulou Report post Posted January 5, 2006 Hi Hev, This is a really difficult one. I don't know what to suggest as Kai is only 7 so i haven't come to this hurdle yet. If you let him go, you'll be worrying, but if you don't, he's going to be unhappy. Very tough decision. Do you know any of these kids? There are some "undesirable" kids in my street, so i'm trying to move before Kai gets to the age where he wants to go out. I suppose if you let him go, you could give him a time when he MUST come back, and also give him boundaries as to where he is allowed to go. You could tell him that if he doesn't follow the rules or gets into ANY trouble, he won't be able to see them again? Good luck, Loulou x Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Suze Report post Posted January 6, 2006 Hi Hev, I too would be worried if it were my son.I know it seems like you are punishing him, but surely thats better at this stage, than later to find these kids have got him into trouble.My son is easily lead and will do things without thinking of the consequences, thats my worry for you and steve <'> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Elanor Report post Posted January 6, 2006 Hi Hev I think you should trust your own judgement on this, provided that you think that the other kids deserve their bad reputation. You need to protect your son, even if he doesn't appreciate it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hev Report post Posted January 6, 2006 hello,these children on my old estate have been known to throw eggs at houses,bully other children and steven would be very easily led so im going with my gut instinct,he will go into major meltdown when he gets home today but i can see what the outcome will be otherwise,hes in at 4.15,im ready for battle Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lindy-lou Report post Posted January 6, 2006 such a shame for steve if he's feeling acceptance from these boys,but my gut instinct would be to stop it now and deal with the backlash,he is a vulnerable boy and these undesirables will pick it up and could use him for all sorts of things,not a nice situation for you <'> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Suze Report post Posted January 6, 2006 .............good luck Hev hope it goes o.k.......... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hev Report post Posted January 6, 2006 all went well,when he got in from school i told him he could go to his fave cousins tonight instead of nans,he was well pleased,i know its not a long term solution as he will go to his nans soon but i just wanted a peaceful friday night with no arguing!!no doubt battle will commence again soon but im ready for him!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hev Report post Posted January 7, 2006 well after all my worrying,hes stayed at mums tonight and she said hes never asked to go out,i dont think he feels that comfortable with these kids anyway or it might have been that i told him on the phone today he was not to go out with them but he never normally takes any notice of me,its strange though cos when i REALLY mean what i tell him,he seems to take notice,i must be getting somewhere Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
loulou Report post Posted January 8, 2006 Hi Hev, Phew, what a relief! Hope you enjoyed the time to yourself. Loulou x Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites