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About Elanor

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    Ben Nevis
  1. Bid and Baddad - I don't disagree with either of your arguments about consequences and responsibility. However, I wanted to make 2 points really - firstly that the aggressive behaviour might be linked to stress and anxiety, and those root causes should be understood and addressed as well. Punishing a behaviour and understanding it are not mutually exclusive. Secondly, an ASD child experiencing an extreme meltdown or rage (see Myers/Southwick 'Asperger Syndrome and Difficult Moments' which was a breakthrough read for me) is not rational, is not in control and as a consequence, isn't responsible for what he does. He might not even be aware of what he has done, and in the aftermath can be incredibly vulnerable. This isn't in the same league as a tantrum and it shouldn't be treated in the same way. As for Time Out - particularly the version whereby a child's period of exclusion increases with the extent of his defiance - l think it might not work because its confrontational, works only if the child will back down and go into Time Out in the first place, and can just escalate the situation and even provoke meltdown. Elanor
  2. Hi Viper I really do empathise with your situation - my son's aggression really started to get out of control at 7. I think this is an age when many children with ASD have increased behavioural problems. Bid has given you tremendous advice and I endorse every word of it - but I also think it's well worth emphasising the causes. The aggression can be a response to stress - and 7 is an age when children are increasingly exposed to demands at school from teachers and from their peer group. My son became more aware of the differences between himself and other children, and found that he could not confrom to the demands of schooling and the exposure to 'real life' as easily as other children. These pressures built up, and he simply didn't have a way to express his difficulties or to cope with them. Of course he needed to learn and understand boundaries, but it always helped to understand why he behaved so badly, and that sometimes punishment was not appropriate. If he lost control, was this because he was doing something naughty, or because he was overwhelmed with feelings he didn't have the means to control or deal with? If it was the second, then why would I punish him, and what did it do to him when he was punished? BTW I really don't recommend 'time out' for a child with ASD (neither does my son's psychiatrist) - it can be like a red rag to a bull. Over the years we've learned to focus our efforts on reducing the situations where he feels stress, anticipating danger points, and controlling his life and experiences to enable him gradually to learn how to control himself. Like you, he had a safe space which he wouldn't use. Slowly he has learned how to remove himself to his safe space, and to regain control (not wothout a lot of damage to the said safe space!). It's taken 5 years and greater maturity (and medication as well), and a lot of sacrifice (from the whole family - spontanaeity was probably the first sacrifice, my husband's career the second) - but we really are seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. He's a lovely smart and loving teenager now, he still has his problems, but we live with them and things are so much better. Every child's different, and I wouldn't presume to compare my situation to yours. I hope you're able to get some help from CAHMS. Elanor
  3. My son was diagnosed by a child psychiatrist (twice - he saw one at CAMHS and a private one). It didn't take long to get the diagnosis, even though he has 'mild' Aspergers. I think you're better off going this route - but if you don't get a diagnosis that you think is right, and if you don't think the psychiatrist has spent enough time investigating, then don't stop there. Demand another opinion - if you can find one, try to get a referral to a local specialist in ASD (try NAS or any local groups in your area, or ask your GP to make enquiries to find a psychiatrist with an interest in ASD). I hope you get the help you need. Elanor
  4. Runescape was very big in my house - but they've moved onto World of Warcraft. The skills and friendships they gained were amazing - but my younger NT (10) boy got badly scammed twice on Runescape - and gave it up after that, as he was very upset.
  5. This was a study on adults with intellectual disability. I have read debate that the study shows that anti-psycotic medication has been inappropriately prescribed when what was needed was behavioural interventions - and that the interesting improved results where placebos were used resulted simply from the individuals receiving a degree of attention which didn't usually get. I'm not sure it casts much light on the usefulness of risperidone in treating aggression or anxiety in children with Asperger's Syndrome - this study didn't in fact look at this group of people.
  6. Hi My son is on 0.5mg per day - one dose in the morning. I believe that the drug metabolises quickly - it doesn't have a cumulative effect. I suggest you discuss the dosage with the professional who subscribed it, it's quite normal to experiment with doses and timings until you settle on something that is effective for your child. Elanor
  7. Does anyone know a specialist in ASD in children, operating in the Rotherham area? A friend desperately needs some help, having been fobbed off a couple of years ago, and is now trying to get a referral. Please don't name anyone in your responses, so as not to break forum rules - could anyone who can help PM me please? Many thanks Elanor
  8. Mine goes to Scouts - it's fantastic, particularly as the leader has a boy with AS and several other AS kids from our local group go there too. It's a really successful and large local group - they do lots of camping, encourage independence and have a clear discipline and ethos of helping each other. Main attraction for my son, is that they make fires all the time! Elanor
  9. Hi Hope things are settling down for you. I came across this recently on Risperidone - now approved in America by the FDA for the treatment of 'irritability' in children with AS http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/medicalnews.php?newsid=53709 Elanor
  10. Hi Have a look here for other threads on this topic http://www.asd-forum.org.uk/forum/index.ph...ebster+stratton I've done the course, and think its an excellent general parenting course, but it has nothing specific in it for children with AS. Some of the techniques - especially time out - are, i think, harmful to children with AS. If you need help in managing a child with AS, then Webster Stratton misses the point by being too general, and focusing on the parent (or at best, the family) as being at fault. Elanor
  11. Hi I'm so pleased that you're getting some respite, and that your son's behaviour is calming down. I'm sure he's much happier - and this could give you a tremendous window to make things better in the longer-term. Elanor
  12. If your doctor recommends risperidone, then I'd suggest you give it a trial. It has a short-term effect in the body - which means that it can have an almost immediate impact on behaviour, but can be withdrawn (under proper medical guidance) very quickly. This makes it quite suitable for a trial (unlike something like Prozac, which can take 3 weeks to have any effect). Risperidone is the only medication tested on children with AS and found to have a substantial benefit on aggression over a lengthy period. Of course nothing works for everyone, but it should be worth a try. My son did suffer weight gain, but the gain stopped after a few months, and now that adolescence is setting in, and he's getting taller, he isn't noticeably heavier than other kids his age. Interaction with sertraline is something you'll have to take professional advice on. You might perhaps find that you don't need both, as risperidone also affects mood and anxiety. You describe a home-life that no-one should have to tolerate, and that is doing your son and your family no good at all. I'm sure that doing nothing is not an option. Medication isn't the only answer, but it can be part of a solution - particularly as it can give you the opportunity of a calm period during which all the good parenting techniques have a chance of having an impact. Take care. Elanor
  13. Thanks everyone - I guess I'll be busy now trying to follow up all your ideas. The BBC website is great, and I'm going to try some of your suggestions to find a tutor locally. Thanks Elanor
  14. Nellie I'll miss you - thanks for everything you've done for us all. Elanor
  15. Thanks everyone, it really helps to read your ideas. Canopus - I really want to help my son reach his potential, and the schooling he's getting won't achieve this. It's not really about his special needs - I just think he could be learning more and enjoying learning. I'll certainly have a look in the papers - maybe the Times Ed as well. D's Mum - you're right about the G&T - and I will challenge them, because I like being awkward, but not because I think it'll get us anywhere. I'll use that link. Elanor
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