Adoption

[madmooch]

Did anyone see the program on adopting abroad the other night?

 

There was a woman who was trying to adopt a romanian boy who was 4 nearly 5yrsand has Autism.

 

Anyway the narrator said the boys Autism may have been caused by his mothers heavy drinking during pregnancy or his lack of love and interaction when he was a baby

 

So according to her we are alcoholics or refrigerator mothers

 

Clare

[adamsmum]

I dident see this and im glad i dident couse it would have made me Why do thes peapl come out with such stupid things dont thay do eny reaserch This kind of ignorance dosent do us eny favers as others wach thes programs then think it's true

[madmooch]

In a way i wish i hadn't of watched it it was so sad seeing all the babies in the orphanages and romanian oficials would rather see them suffer than let someone from abroad adopt them

 

Clare

[Tensing]

I saw it, and it made my blood boil too.

[DaisyProudfoot]

Was going to watch it - glad I didn't now - so were all a bunch of neglectful, uncaring alcoholics

 

Ah well .... the fight goes on to prove our innocence eh?

 

Daisy

[ceecee]

I saw this and thought it was a ridiculous asumption to make.Sadly there are many ignorant people who will believe it.

[Elouise]

Get practical....write in to the program producers AND the company AND the channel that broadcast it.

 

 

I always find 'I am writing to seek clarification as to the exact point the presentator/social worker/etc was trying to make always upsets people and makes then nervous about things being taken further and keeps them on their toes.

[Kathryn]

I watched this. If I remember rightly, it was called "Baby Be Mine" and it was on BBC 1 with a second part to come, although I don't know if this particular boy will feature again.

 

A woman from the uk was living in Romania and working in an orphanage. She became fond of one of the young boys and fostered him. She was barred from adopting him at first as the authorities are against foreign adoptions, but eventually she became a Romanian citizen and they let her do it. She has permission to bring him to the UK to get further help for him.

 

I didn't hear the narrator say what the causes of his autism were - I must have missed this bit. I agree it does parents no favours if people make generalisations like this. I was discussing it with my other half who is a clinical psychologist. What muddies the waters is that children who spend the first few months/years of their life in such neglectful conditions with the minimum of human interaction do develop behaviours which look very similar to autism. If they are later appropriately cared for they can recover cognitively but many of them will continue to have some kind of social impairment, apparently.

[loulou]

Hi,

 

I watched it too and that comment was ridiculous and totally ignorant

 

HOWEVER, the English woman who was looking after the little boy in question (Dillon) was doing an absolutely brilliant job looking after him. She was only young and had been working in the orphanage where Dillon was living. She fell in love with him (he was a sweetie), and then became his foster mum. She had sacrificed alot to look after him, but she was a fabulous mum to him. Apparently she has now been given permission to adopt him and can bring him to the UK.

 

When you saw Dillon's birth mother, she couldn't even remember how many kids she had. She was an alcoholic and was living in a slum. She had abandoned him at the maternity unit when he was born. The Romanian officials wanted Dillon to go back and live with her, rather than the English woman. Very sad.

 

Loulou x