Ten things every child with autism wishes you knew

[Tez]

I regularly use an internet site that is completely unconnected with autism, education or parenting but which has a general discussion board to which a large number of teachers contribute. Over the weekend someone posted a link to a blog with an article,

 

Ten things every child with autism wishes you knew

 

The teachers on the board have seized on this as the gospel and are going to use it to inform their colleagues. What do you think? Would you be happy for your child's teachers to be given this as it stands?

[Hectorshouse]

Thanks Tez that was a really good read, it is something that I will be printing off for school.

 

As with many of these things it is a generalisation, but to the uninformed it is a good start to enable them to change their perceptions.

 

Hxx

[Guest hallyscomet]

My son could have written that.....

 

H.

[Brook]

It's quite good, but only really touches the surface, I did think though when I read number 10 that, my son

does tell white lies, he does cheat at games because he cant stand to lose, also he would tattle on

classmates but be unaware that he was tattling, just stating what had happened.

 

Dont think I would hand it over to a teacher the way it is at the moment, maybe tweak it a little.

 

Brook

[Kathryn]

It's quite good, but only really touches the surface, I did think though when I read number 10 that, my son

does tell white lies, he does cheat at games because he cant stand to lose, also he would tattle on

classmates but be unaware that he was tattling, just stating what had happened.

 

Dont think I would hand it over to a teacher the way it is at the moment, maybe tweak it a little.

 

Brook

 

I agree with you, Brook. My daughter often passes judgement on people as she has very clear views of what is right and wrong. I think it would be very difficult to avoid generalisations in a description like this, though. Perhaps it would be better written in the plural to get across the idea hat there are many variations in the way ASD is expressed - "some of us do X, but a few of us might do do Y" - for example.

 

And I'd take issue once again with the idea of "having autism" as opposed to being "autistic" - this has come up in discussion many times on here. The authour probably doesn't mean it to be taken this way, but there is the implication that underneath all this is just a normal child really. And then it's a small leap to the position that the child can be cured of all this stuff (like poor eyesight, and excess weight ). So I'd want to change one or two things in the first bit.

 

However, I like the way it's written, the concrete examples given make it easy for someone with no knowledge of ASD to relate to.

 

K

Edited March 6, 2006 by Kathryn

[Tez]

It is interesting on the other board to see the difference in opinion between the parents of autistic children and the teachers. The teachers, for the most part, have little understanding of autism and are happy to have some idea of what they can link behaviour back to. However, the opening comments of this article, have given some of these teachers the impression that autism can be cured or that you should not be labelling these children. Comments range from, "I will be really happy to show this to one parent because unfortunately she's the one who wants her child labelled and shrugs off every little thing he achieves," to more general comments that suggest that interventions such as the son rise programme or dietary interventions will cure the autism and solve the behavioural issues they have to deal with.

 

On the other hand, the parents are keen to point out that it is a start but that autism can't be cured, that as Kathryn says some children, higher functioning teenagers particularly, want to be known as autistic and not as having autism, and that all children are different, not all children with autism have sensory issues, not all are visual thinkers etc.

[DaisyProudfoot]

It's nice, and I think it will help anyone - teachers, youth workers etc who know very little about Autism. It is a generalisation but it's OK because no one is expected to know the whole text book - unless they're autistic themselves of course. I liked the end of it so I've added it to my signature. Especially Patience, it'll remind me during meltdown moments!

[mum22boys]

It was a really interesting read.

 

I particually liked the point about wanting to play but not knowing how to start a converation or join in. That is so M. He desperately wants to play but just can't. His IEP has this on it - to encourage him to ask to play but reading this I feel it would be better to encourage the other kids to invite him to play.

 

May print this off for his teacher.

 

mum22boys

[Suze]

Although some aspects could be discussed and debated I feel in the most part this would be quite helpful to someone less knowledgeable.For instance many would not realise the sensory problems a visit to the supermarket brings on.I feel there are many people I have met over the course of time who could benefit from reading this.

[Lucas]

I read this before a long time ago and disagree with most of it. I do not think it would give an outsider trying to learn about Autism anything that can be called 'insight'.

 

It is written by a non-Autistic making assunptions. Whilst it's not all bad the very first in the list completely colours the rest. I *am* primarily Autistic and I would not be Autistic if I was not. The hardest question on the subject of Autism is "What is Autism?" and every answer that can come from a Neurotypical can only be wrong by virtue of their Neurology- even if they are repeating what an Autistic said in answer to this question(because a remotely accurate answer is always spoken of from first and third person to allow for a complicated picture).

 

When you claim Autism is part of the person, Autism is not part of the person, Autism is only a part of the person or Autism is the whole of the person you are talking about what Autism is. When you talk about what Autism is, what you say is heard by others and has far-reaching consequences that can be better or for worse. You would proberly need a Phd in Philosophy AND Psychology to accurately say what Autism is if you're not Autistic yourself(and I foul it up all the time with some pretty flawed analogies).

 

If a person is defined by their choices, then Autism is the person because an Autistic will percieve choices differently and choose for different reasons. If a person is defined by how others see them, then Autism does not part of the person because many Autistics are effectively 'cured' in the eyes of others. Best I can come up with for now.

 

I am glag this list has had some revisions though, I have a much less favourable view of it when I first read it.

[justamom]

I thought it was a very interesting read. I will be printing it out for alot of our family to have a look at.

 

 

This part struck home to me, because it makes such sense to me personally because alot of people (i am probably guiltly of this myself to some extent)always look at the autism/AS and my son is a person not just someone who has autism... It stuck a cord!!!

 

I am first and foremost a child. I have autism. I am not primarily ?autistic.? My autism is only one aspect of my total character. It does not define me as a person. Are you a person with thoughts, feelings and many talents, or are you just fat (overweight), myopic (wear glasses) or klutzy (uncoordinated, not good at sports)? Those may be things that I see first when I meet you, but they are not necessarily what you are all about.

 

 

thanks for that

[phasmid]

We all start from a basis of no knowledge or very little knowledge of a disability/problem/difficulty/diference (call it/them what you will) when facing it for the first time. Mrs P has a condition called Lupus. One or two on here I know have first hand knowledge of this. Many do not. A similar article would explain the difficulties she faces as a result of having this. It would have to be a general thing as, like ASDs, lupus comes with many co-morbids and no two people have exactly the same problems at the same time or indeed triggered by the same thing.

 

There are some points within this article that I, like others have already said, would disagree with (the no lying one springs to mind). However as a general introduction to ASD this is a fairly well written introduction. I would, with a few changes, be happy to print this off and hand it to colleauges at school as the basis of an introduction to ASDs. However I would put on a list of websites and books etc as suggestions for further reading.

 

As a general introduction I doubt many of us could have done any better.