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hsmum

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Everything posted by hsmum

  1. Hello, Could anyone tell me if there is a support group for people with ASD and parents/carers of people with ASD in the York area, and if so, whwen and where does it meet. Thanks Janet
  2. Hello, My son (nearly 10) loves cycling. He has a lot of stamina and his confidence shines when he is on his bike. Are there any ASD friendly clubs or groups in the York area which he could join? Thank you, Janet
  3. Hello, Thank you for the replies. I am sure they will be helpful. Kathryn, experiences of parents would be very welcome as well. Esther, I think your comments are really valid and I also have experience of the lack of information available to lecturers in colleges, and thanks for the warning about red tape. Janet
  4. Hello, My son has a best friend at school. His friend, in my opinion, has classic symptoms of autism: profuse hand wringing, rigid and repetitive behaviour, social impairment (my son is his only friend and the friendship consists of the other boy treating my son like a pet) and impairment of communication ( for example exchanges of silly words and noises instead of conversation). The problem is that my son has a diagnosis of Asperger Syndrome and this diagnosis has led to real benefits. For example, he has a support worker assigned to him who has real expertise in ASD and can help my son make sense of class work and relationships and who is actively builiding up his self esteem. My son's behaviour is also often interpreted as being triggered by his particular impairments. My son's friend, however, has a diagnosis of Global Learning Difficulties and as such does not recieve the more specialised treatment that my son receives. I know people can have ASD and GLD, but I am shocked that staff at the school have not questioned the differences in diagnosis when the boys are so similar. I may get the opportunity to see my son's freind's mother over the Easter period. What should I advise her to do to get another diagnosis? She said the specialist said her boy could not have an ASD because he made too much eye contact. The eye contact her son makes is profuse, but never held for long. Thanks
  5. Hello, I have just been offered a post as co-ordinator for ASC support at a college of further education. I think it is vital to incorporate in our practice, strategies which students with ASC have, themselves, found useful. Therefore, I would be really grateful if people who are students in FE or who have recently been students and who have ASC could briefly detail: what problems they faced and what strategies or help they found most useful in the college context. Please do not give your name or the name of the college involved. I hope I am not breaching any forum rules with this request. Thank you, Janet
  6. Hello, My son (H.) is a lovely boy, but somethimes his behaviour can be a little challenging. He becomes very loud, a little hyperactive and basically cannot cope with unstructured time. Occasionally my husband has grabbed hold of H. as he has whizzed around the room making noises. When my husband does this, H. repeatedly hits or bites the place where he has been grabbed until blood or bruising appears. He also screams at hubby and tries to attack him. Today, H. was running around the kitchen screaming at his brother. Hubby tried to grab H's arm to stop him knocking things over. He accidentally grabbed H. by the back of the neck (not hard). H. has scratched the area quite badly and later in the day when people have commented on the marks, H. said he did it because 'Daddy hit him'. I do not know quite how to interpret the behaviour. H. seems confused about exactly why he hurts himself.
  7. Hello, My son (H.) is a lovely boy, but somethimes his behaviour can be a little challenging. He becomes very loud, a little hyperactive and basically cannot cope with unstructured time. Occasionally my husband has grabbed hold of H. as he has whizzed around the room making noises. When my husband does this, H. repeatedly hits or bites the place where he has been grabbed until blood or bruising appears. He also screams at hubby and tries to attack him. Today, H. was running around the kitchen screaming at his brother. Hubby tried to grab H's arm to stop him knocking things over. He accidentally grabbed H. by the back of the neck (not hard). H. has scratched the area quite badly and later in the day when people have commented on the marks, H. said he did it because 'Daddy hit him'. I do not know quite how to interpret the behaviour. H. seems confused about exactly why he hurts himself.
  8. Hello, Just voicing my support for this forum. I have browsed here for two or three years (I think!) and there have been no personal spats or unsupported claims. For me the forum serves as a vital source of support and advice and a safe place for me to share experiences.
  9. Hello, We were going to move to an area closer to my place of work. Everything was going well until we made enquiries about provision for my son who has Asperger's Syndrome and other learning difficulties. Currently he has a statement which stipulates that he receives 22 hours of support in the classroom and 5 outside (per week). When I talked to the head of the prospective new school she said that the LEA for that area had said that he almost certainly would not recieve that amount of funded support from them and they (the LEA) had asked for a SEN review with (we were told) the intention of re-issuing the content of the statement with a suggestion that my son received 6 hours of funded support because that was the average amount of support a child with H's disability recieved in that region. I was shocked that provision could vary so much within 50 miles and, whilst at first I felt like fighting the LEA concerned, I knew this would take a lot of time and effort and meanwhile my son would have no assurance of adequate support. I was even more shocked that such a decision could be made purely on economical grounds and without even seeing my son. The school were very supportive, and even said they would provide support (out of the school budget), but I did not feel that addressed the fundamental issue of disparity. I cannot feel too annoyed by the LEA concerned, there are huge demands on its SEN budget. However I was shocked by the scale of the inequality.
  10. Hello, My son plays at being a horse called 'Nayus Payus'. He walks on all fours and sticks his teeth out (like a horse, I suppose). He also makes rather irritating neighing noises when he gets bored. It is all great fun until his school friends try to ride him! The game shows that H can play imaginatively, that he enjoys social interaction (he loves it when other children join in), that he has a lot of ability with language (e.g. the horse's name) and, that he is years behind in terms of emotional maturity (he is nearly ten and his friends are talking about football, computer games and --- girls!).
  11. hsmum

    New School

    Hello Puffin, No they are in different LEAs. We have cxontacted the LA for the new scholl and asked for the statement to be passed on.
  12. hsmum

    New School

    Hello, We are moving house and the boys are changing school at the end of this month. I have an appointment to see the headmistress of the new school and the SENCo on Wednesday. Both my sons have special needs:DS1 is statemented and DS2 is on School Action Plus. The school is a small village junior school. What sort of questions should I ask? Thanks
  13. I know how you feel. With H and his brother I get the '[normal' boyish behaviour of horse play, fighting, tearing around like mad things and so on, with the addition of H really losing control when he feels some injustice has occurred. Well, it's back to work and a bit of peace next week.
  14. Hello, I know the question refers to teenagers, however my nine year old son puts ligatures around his neck, bites his arms and hands, hits his head, pulls out his hair and will pour liquid or soil over himself when he is very angry or upset. He often talks about killing himself and 'breaking himself'. We contacted the mental health team and we were told that in children of H's age, this sort of behaviour is not regarded as 'self harming', but rather an inability to communicate his feelings. I tend to disagree.
  15. Hello, Both my children understood the concept of so many sleeps. My seven year old (NT) still prefers this way of referring to time over weeks and months. On a related subject H (9) has just learnt to tell the time. All of a sudden he can read clocks to tell me exactly how many minutes past the hour and to the hour it is; he can use the 24 hour clock system; he can use digital and analogue clocks and he can work out exactly how long it is from one point of reference to another. Just a few months ago he had absolutley no concept of time and no interest in clock time at all. Sometimes things just 'click'.
  16. Hi, I am afraid I do not buy teachers presents. However, I have written a letter of thanks to the very supportive team who have been going out of their way with H this year.
  17. Hello, Thank you for the response. I have just sent an e-mail asking if it is possible to have a look round the school. I know that the school caters for a range of abilities and uses the SPELL strategy. My concerns are: (1) I do not want H to experience what his cousin went through at school. She was withdrawn and home educated from the age of 13. (2) H is 9 and he finds most of the social situations at school unmanageable (he hides under a bench at playtime). He also self harms mildly. The school specialises in Autistic Spectrum Disorders and may be able to help H cope a little better. H is also 3 years behind his peers in most academic subjects. On the other hand, H will be separated from his brother if he goes to a specials school. He will (as Doodle states) not have as much opportunity to mix with mainstream pupils. Anyway, hopefully I will have a look around and see if the school could possibly be the best palce for H.
  18. Hello, There is a very good school close to where I work which specialises in teaching pupils with ASDs. We are thinking of moving closer to my workplace when H's Statutory Assessment is complete. Therefore, we are tentatively considering the possibility of H attending the special school. I would welcome any comments about the advantages or disadvantages of special schools over mainstream and vice versa. Just so that we are a little more informed. Thanks
  19. Hello, I used to work with quite severely autistic people. Many of the clients were terrified of dogs. Dogs are unpredictable: they might bark, jump, chase etc. Dogs also come in lots of different shapes and sizes. With some clienta, we had to do a 'dog check' before going out.
  20. Hello, I know how you feel. H has just left for a weekend residential trip to Malham. He has seen lots of pictures of the area; he has helped to pack all his thiings and ticked them off the list; we have been through the itinerary together and he has decided that he will try to do the seven mile walk. However, this is his first time away from home and there are a lot of changes in routine, so I am a little anxious. Yet, hopefully, it will prove to him that he can sleep on his own.
  21. Hello, It is really coincidental that this topic has been raised today. I am a full time teacher in FE and I love my job. My husband is full time carer for our children (9 and 7). However, H's problems are escalating and my husband (who has mental health problems) is not coping. So, a day's sickness today has given me time to think. Should I try to go part time so that I can support my husband and children more? Should I look for a job that is local, so that I am on the doorstep? I am not flattering myself, but I am sure my absence (work commitments and commuting can make 12 hour days) are affecting my family; and I am sure that the worry of what H is doing (he has started self harming) and how my husband is coping, is affecting my work.
  22. Hello, H is a strapping nine year old. However, he insists on sleeping with me. He says he is frightened of nightmares and that he likes to feel me beside him. I have tried putting him in bed with his younger brother, a not so strapping seven year old, but H wakes up in tears and moves into my bed. I have tried just about every kind of relaxing night time routine, and I have tried the 'get tough and let him cry' approach. Does anyone else have this problem? Is sleeping with mum something he will grow out of? Should I just get an extra large bed? Has anyone any advice on how to wean him out of this habit?
  23. Hello, Generally the people who make inappropriate comments to H tend to be quite 'laddish' men who are tactless with everyone. I am surprised that a health professional would make such a remark. (Apologies to any laddish men who may be on the forum).
  24. Hello, My seven year old is on Stage 4; my nine year old is on Stage 6. For my own peace of mind I have stopped caring about what stage their friends and peers are on. They are both progressing, slowly but surely; they both enjoy reading; and I am convinced that by the time they leave school they will be able to read most texts quite competently.
  25. Hello, Until very recently I worked in a Young Offenders Institute (males aged 15-18). I cannot generalise, but my own impression was that very few boys arrived with a specific diagnosis of ASD (a much larger proportion had a diagnosis of ADHD), although in the process of teaching the boys it became obvious that quite a significant number of trainees had autistic traits. The general consensus amongst teaching staff was that the ASD-trait boys were probably not diagnosed because: (a) their behaviour was attributed to their background; ( their parents or guardians did not know how to go about acquiring a diagnosis. The YOI was a hard place for any youngster, but for those on the spectrum it seemed worse. For example, there was very little privacy; the streetwise boys could very easily manipulate the ASD boys ('stitch them up'); the language (a mixture of street slang and prison slang) was confusing for people who have a literal interpretation and routines were often disrupted. When my own son was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome, I began to wonder if people with ASDs were less likely to offend because they liked to stick to rules etc. or whether they were more likely to offend because they did not understand social rules and/or they were more easily led than the NT population. I still do not know the answer. I know I am telling you something that you already know, but do take into account the other variables when you consider ASDs and offending. Socio-economic factors, life history, substance abuse, school experience and specific learning difficulties and being male all contribute to the increased likelihood of offending.
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