matzoball

Is there any way you can challenge that decision?

Ooh they sound lovely - I reckon we should all swap our favourite recipes

Willow - I'm not arguing - just putting my point of view across the same as yourself. If you are taking it that way then I sincerely apologise. I didn't say I wasn't seeing your point of view either, you're assuming I'm not, because I'm not entirely agreeing with you. I respect your opinion, just as I hope you respect mine. What's funny is we are actually saying a lot of the same things, actually agreeing with each other - just in different ways. Being Autistic, or having Aspergers means different things to different people. When people ask me what Aspergers is - I always begin with 'What Aspergers means for me is...' because it's a truly unique condition that affects each person differently. Some people will have an easy time of it, some won't. Some will get lazy and blame negative behaviours on their condition, some will challenge those behaviours and evolve like you have, like I have. We can both discuss, as we have been doing, what should happen to best encourage children to become more self sufficient and learn coping mechanisms for their disabilities. However you at your age, and me at my age are at a point where we can really only discuss it to a point as it's purely academical without having the experience of having a child and trying to support them. Can I ask what your experiences are of trying to get support as you are over 18? I am interested as I am currently trying to get some support myself!

Willow, there isn't a cookie cutter solution to care. There never will be, because it's a spectrum. Everyone falls somewhere different within it. Some people might not need support, some do. You're right. Your brother was extremely lucky in his support system, and his experiences in school. That's great for him. It's also unfortunate that your friend is so dependent on his Mum. But not everyone can be that lucky to not get bullied, or taken advantage of, or struggle in classes because they can't advocate for themselves. Each person is different in what they can handle. Your brother can handle himself fine, my nephew can't - and he's in a mainstream school. I did actually say that the system is flawed. I did say there needed to be change. I also made suggestions on how that could be remedied. To suggest that people should not rely on support is a dangerous line of thinking. Sometimes that's the only avenue available to someone, it doesn't make them less of a person or parent to use it - and it's slightly insulting to those who do to suggest they are making mistakes trying to help their children. Ideally - it's all about finding the right balance between support and independence.

The perspective of the person with ASD is definitely valid Willow. I didn't say that. I'd be a self-hating ASD person if I did. My mum has Aspergers. Lyndalou has Aspergers and she is a parent. Are their perspectives invalid because they are parents? It's the parent that has to navigate the system for the child, because simply put - a child, especially a child with a disability is ill equipped to deal with the nuances, and frustrations of dealing with an inept system. What I do think would be useful is a workshop for children approaching 18, showing them how to apply for support themselves, how to handle phone calls, how to get an advocate when it simply isn't possible to advocate for themselves. Proper life skills that they will need. All of this is dependent on how pronounced their ASD is. Most people with ASD on here, yourself and myself included are lucky that we can be as verbal and as communicative as we are. What about children who are non-verbal or have mobility issues, or are non-engaging? How can they put their point across? It's usually their parent that does that for them. Just because goverment support stops - it doesn't mean their parent stops being their parent. What also needs to happen are ASD awareness courses in goverment departments that deal with the public so that misunderstandings due to communication issues are dealt with more tolerance, that plain language is used, right down to the colour of paper that letters are printed on. The unfortunate reality is that the goverment are taking away so much from people who desparately need it. People are having to become more and more self reliant - in some cases that can be the making of someone, but for a desparate parent who needs that extra help with their child who they love very much and want to help them but can't because they were depending on a local service that has been taken away - it may prove the undoing of them. No ones views are being discounted - there is the need for better communication between all parts of the spectrum. Parents and children alike. The fact is that right now, to live in the UK, with the services we have - it's crud. Things need to change. But only if we all work together. It's a big world out there and there is room for all of us.

You're going round in circles in your head. Stop it. If you are really worried, talk to that person about it. But you need to break that cycle! Come on Smiley you are doing really well. Stop self sabotaging I know you can do it!

I think you are creating a problem for yourself needlessly. You've got an adventure to go on, think about that instead okay?

I don't think anyone can really know until they are a parent. It's interesting to hear different perspectives on it however.

That's not just a you thing. Everyone is guilty of that. Stop being so hard on yourself and focus on the good stuff. End of.

The way you had worded it wasn't too clear. Now it is.

What do you mean by that?

I can't comment on that, I'm not a parent nor am I likely to be. It's something each parent will have to sort out when it happens. Not perfect or ideal but without having gone through that process, I can't comment further.

Think this is getting away from the OP a wee bit - are there any more people who have experienced AS friendly screenings?

You do your best. You get moral support from sites like this. There isn't one approach that will work for everyone but instead of focussing on what isn't there, focus on what is available. The government aren't doing a very good job in keeping support where it is needed but we can support each other.

Well, I never had autism friendly screenings when I was little. But over time I learned to cope and find ways of being able to enjoy mainstream entertainment without losing out. I wear noise reducing earplugs that let me enjoy loud films and gigs. I use the disabled areas in concert halls and festivals that allow me to have fun without having to worry about people triggering panic attacks etc Site like these are also a great way to find out how other people cope and try it out for themselves. I mystery shop entertainment venues on how disability friendly they are - if they aren't they are given recommendations on how to change that and are also given awareness training. Things are getting better.

I LOVE Dune. Though the mini series was a lot closer to the first book than Lynch's film Was great to see a 'real life' Shai Halud!

Well, don't analyse it, just enjoy it

So people are starting to hear back about the job - I am freaking out because I still haven't heard yet, but my friend has. This is the worst!

Awesome What are you making?

Here's a great place that does Autism Friendly Screenings and they explain what that term means in relation to the cinema. http://www.glasgowfilm.org/theatre/whats_on/season:access_take_2 These are more for children, but you get the gist. I don't think intelligence is really being called in to question here - it's more sensory issues and the like.

That's brilliant Ash

Hi Isobel - the term 'AS sufferers' is also not a good one to use for some people - I have Aspergers, and I don't feel I suffer. Apart from hangovers. I suffer them a lot.

Do you have a prospects in your area? Might be worth going on the NAS site and seeing what is available in your area?