laila

Did you contact her after this? It may be that she hasn't contacted you because she hasn't heard from you and may think you don't want to meet up. In friendships where i have usually been the one making arrangements, i do sometimes wonder if that person wants to be friends with me. Maybe you could contact her and suggest making arrangements to do something else?

Thankyou Darkshine!! at last someone has said exactly what ive been thinking! Iv actually been put off from writing anything at all on this forum because of his attitude. I think he has more serious issues than most people on here, especially with women!

it is pretty confusing! i wouldn't have thought it would be obvious to anyone.

I was confused about this at first too. It doesn't mean that is where you live, i think it represents how long you've been a member. eg...norfolk broads is for new members and more experienced members have different names. x

These people sound awful! There are certain people out there who will take advantage of anyone they can, i'm afraid. I personally would never ask anyone to take out a phone contract for me. It isn't something that anyone really 'needs' and if i couldn't get one myself i'd get a pay-as-you-go phone. People like this make me angry too. Try not to push you're other friends away though. Do they know about what has happened? There are a lot of good people out there too so i'm sure you have good friends who value your friendship.

Thank you, this makes so much sense. I do tend to think about how i say things such as being specific about things but i never thought about changing language in the way you suggest. I'll definately try it. It does take a while to get used to, i still sometimes forget. I do sometimes find him difficult to read, even though i find him so easy to get on with and talk to. I try to avoid subjects he doesn't like though as i don't see the point in stressing him but otherwise i don't see his AS as a negative at all, in fact usually the opposite. Congratulations to you and your wife on 29 years of marriage by the way! That doesn't seem to happen much anymore!

Happy belated Birthday!! It sounds like you had a good day and have lots of good friends and family. The open house idea sounds really good too! x

This is the way i would find much easier too! He seems to be the opposite though and is more open and direct when we're together.

I think you're right, as he does seem to avoid any conversations about how he feels, not only about me but about anything. Lately i've been avoiding mentioning certain things so we just enjoy each others company again without the two of us both ending up stressed. I'm not sure if this is the right thing to do but it's definately the easiest!

Thanks Jannih, i think you posted while i was typing my last one. It always takes me quite a long time to trust someone so i never really rush into anything. I've had a couple of boyfriends before who i think have just got fed up of waiting and moved on so maybe thats happened again.

thanks for the advice guys. I've tried talking to him about it a couple of times but he just won't discuss it. I don't think there's much more i can do than just be his friend and see what happens. Like you said Bid, if he liked me he'd let me know. Its just so confusing as he gives such mixed signals. I'll probably get one of the books that Smiley sent a link for too. Even if he has no interest in me, i'm sure it will still be good for our friendship. Thanks again

Hi, I'm not sure if anyone can help with this as i know Asperger's affects everyone in different ways, but i'd be really grateful for any advice. I'm in love with a guy who has asperger's and would love to be with him but he seems to hate talking about anything "emotional". He seemed to really like me to begin with, but as we got closer, he just seems to retreat more! The problem is, i have no idea if this is because of his asperger's or that he simply just isn't attracted to me anymore. I can't just ask him as it isn't something that he'll talk about at all. I don't want to be with anyone else other than him and don't want to give up on him, but if he just isn't interested in me anymore i know i'll have to at some point. Is there any way i can figure out what he wants?