hollypoppy

Thanks for your replies, I really appreciate it. I'm determined not to give up this time. My little boy also has trouble concentrating t school because of the noise, so when I spoke to his teacher she said, "wear earplugs"!!!!!! When I said that was inappropriate she said he could sit on a quieter table. Needless to say, when he asked to sit on the quiet table she said No! I'm now going to see her next week to sort this out. when you have teachers like that, the poor kids don't stand a chance! x

Hi As most of you know, the road to diagnosis is very very long! I gave up trying with my 8 year old son for a while as I just couldn't cope with the constant rejection from healthcare professionals. He's now been re-referred and we've just received an interesting letter from the new Paed which has made me very angry. Basically the old Paed discharged him while the SALT still had concerns. ......Dr ****** discharged you in 2009. I note however that the SALT still had concerns that he still had difficulty sharing and interacting with other children, and that he had obsessions around food and routines.............. I'm so annoyed that he was discharged while the SALT had concerns. The Paed had even seen him in a full blown meltdown!!!!!!!!!! Has anyone else had this problem, and did you get any joy with different Paeds? Thanks

Hi! I'm trying to get a diagnosis of ASD/aspergers for my 8yr old son. We've just been given 2 questionnaires from the paediatrician, one Social Communications questionnaire and one Conners' Parent Rating Scale. Has anyone got any experience of what happens once these are completed by me and the school? Thanks

Just wanted to say, that even though you hate it, I think it's fantastic that you managed to do it xx

Hi, someone on here had this quote on their profile and I think it's sooo true, hope it helps "Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to, doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have"

Hi! This is why I think medical staff need more training into ASD, especially in cases of emergency admissions to hospital, where there is no time to prepare for the change in routine.

Hi I just wondered what people experiences were of being treated in hospital for non-ASD problems? The reason I ask is, that I work in a Hospital and one of our patients has Aspergers. His admission is through a totally unrelated medical condition. Luckily, through personal experience, I have an understanding of Aspergers and hopefully am treating my patient sensitively. I have heard various staff members using expressions such as "a bit odd", "he's a bit precious" " doesn't want to help himself" Staff also getting annoyed that he doesn't want to do things in "order" ( such as getting washed before breakfast) In actual fact, he has been taken out of his own surroundings, placed in an environment with completely different routines, staff coming and going all day and evening, lots of noise, having needles stuck in him...the list goes on. the chance of sensory overload, I should imagine is very high!! I'm not blaming my colleagues for their attitudes, I think it's ignorance and lack of understanding, but with just a little training we could make patients lives easier in this environment It would be interesting to hear anyone elses experiences, staff or patient, good or bad

Hi Thanks for sharing with us I was married to a man with Aspergers, and we have 2 children together. Unfortunately for us it didn't work out and it led to a divorce. Having said that, it was all very amicable and we still get on ok now. I think life can be a constant learning curve for both people in the relationship! I'm still learning now and we've been divorced a few years! I like how you say weirdness, we used the word "oddisms". not as a derogatory term, but a way of describing behaviour that either of us didn't understand about each other. At times it can seem almost impossible, but keep doing what you're doing, you sound like you've got a really strong relationship x

Hi,, I'm sorry, I don't have any answers but just wanted to send a hug <'> Hopefully somebody can offer you some help

I totally agree!

No offence taken! lol. The only reason I suggested an area for parents with kids on the spectrum etc, is that it maybe easier to find specific info and people with the same issues. My ex-husband is dx aspergers and our ideas on whether our undx son is on the spectrum are totally different. I agree that its good to have diversity and in the long run we're all here to get and give support and advice <'>

Hi! Welcome to the forum! I have a 7 yr old (undx ASD) son and a 5yr old NT son, hopefully you'll get lots of help and advice on here

I've just watched it, and it was very interesting, I could really relate to the parents going through the process of getting a diagnosis for their son

I came on here to get advice on Childhood Autism. Its really useful to get a perspective from adults on the spectrum, but maybe would be an idea to have an area of the forum for parents?

Touch (without his permission) definitely seems to be something which sets him off. Hugs are also on his terms. I can't "just hug" him, I have to ask, or he comes to me occasionally. He's ok with haircuts but we've been going to the same place, with the same hairdresser since he was one so its routine for him. Its so hard, because I see posts on here where people are on the spectrum and my son doesn't seem that extreme with some things, but he has too many "quirks" and ASD behaviour to be NT. Its just getting people to understand. What's action plus? I've not heard of that? He had an IEP, but tbh the school seem to think he's "normal" so its hard to get any help from them. I've been sent on parenting courses and been told that maybe I'm trying to make the quirks fit a diagnosis. He's now going up to Junior School in Sept, so we'll see how his behaviour is with such a major change I'm so glad to find this site where people actually understand x

Think our posts crossed Mike, but thanks for the links

Mike, We split 4 years ago so its all resolved and his dad & I are very amicable. I think its feelings that his dad left him and he doesn't understand why, especially as he moved 4 hours away.It's almost like he blames me and his brother for his dad not being here. As I'm typing this, he's being very well behaved, sitting quietly, eating his breakfast, we just never know when he's going to flip! Suze I understand the sensory overload thing, and I try never to take him shopping, unfortunately we made the brave effort to get school shoe shopping out of the way early. Maybe it may have been better to take him alone or to go first thing in the morning before it got busy. I've been trying for ages to get hi to understand that no amount of violence is acceptable, but he seems oblivious to it

Hi! Welcome to the site, I love your duck pic

We are having that situation at this very moment......He realised something had been on TV this morning that he likes, he then screamed at me for not recording it, burst into tears and was inconsolable, blaming me because he missed it. I tried to explain that if neither of us know it was on TV, we wouldn't know to record it - but there is no reasoning when he is like this. I could see his anger building so he is now in his room to cool off before he lashes out at either me or his brother

HI Thanks to everyone who has replied to me so far, I really appreciate it. Jade - the Red Beast Book is now on my "to buy" list as I think my son definitely has trouble understanding his own anger. There is an amount of sibling rivalry, which I understand, but the violent behaviour is not just limited to his brother, it's now spreading to other children and family members (if they say something he doesn't like, he can lash out and hurt them). It doesn't help that me & his dad split 4 years ago, His Dad was diagnosed with Aspergers so I think he maybe one of the few people who he can relate to. He sees him every other weekend, but for the 2 weeks in between he has no contact with his dad.

Hi I'm quite conscious of additives, colours, high sugar etc, so try to give him a balanced diet, he doesn't eat dairy products particularly apart from strawberry yogurt and dairylea. he does eat processed food like fishfingers, but then has fruit & veg too. He doesn't play on games consoles, apart from his DS which only has Super Mario and a Dinosaur Game on it. As for the control, I don;'t know how to control this behaviour as it comes from nowhere, This is what we need help with. He will be the loveliest little boy one minute, but within a few seconds can change into a violent child filled with rage It's not just his little brother, he's kicked me and his grandma, smacked his friend in the face... the list goes on... Any help would be gratefully received!

Hi, thanks for your reply, I saw the GP a couple of weeks ago and he is referring us, just waiting for an appointment. My son was assessed for ASD/ four years ago but they said he was "fine" and its "just his age". Now he's getting older his "behaviours" are becoming more obvious and definitely can't be put down to his age, I just hope we get somewhere this time and we get the help we need

Can anyone give me advice on how to handle my 7yr old (undx asd) son's violent behaviour? An example from today: His 5yr old (NT) brother kissed him on the neck, so he grabbed his arm, swung him round and threw him to the floor in the middle of the shopping mall. It was with such force, my 5yr old smacked the back of his head on the concrete floor. I'm so worried that he will seriously injure his younger brother and really don;t know how to deal with it. I've tried "grounding" him, talking, shouting, reasoning, and would love to hear from anyone who can help! I feel like I'm banging my head on a brick wall

And hello back to you Darkshine

I really feel for you, especially when you are being left alone to cope with all this. It's a hard job in itself having a young baby, let alone trying to deal with your elder child's behaviour. Have you explained to your husband how upset it's making you? I know from experience how depression can creep in when you have a baby and a young child with challenging behaviour. Could she be screaming partly due to not being able to cope with/process the extra noise the baby is making. Maybe the poking, slapping etc is an attempt to stop the crying? It's only a suggestion, but what about explaining to your daughter that it's OK to scream but if she does it will need to be in another room or outside. Our educational psychologist told us once that if you try to stop a particular behaviour, it often gets replaced by another - it's a gamble what the "replacement behaviour" could be, whether it's better or worse!! I don't know if what I've said is any help, but hopefully you'll gets lots of suggestions on here, and remember you're not alone xxx