Mihaela

Harry Potter was heavily promoted from the very beginning both in Britain and the USA, and the films added to its popularity. Most children's authors don't get anything this amount of publicity. This certainly helped enormously, but I think the mix of genres also had a great effect. It arrived at a time when the popularity of fantasy fiction in the Anglophone world was on the rise (including Sabrina the Teenage Witch, The Worst Witch, Narnia and a popular resurgence of Tolkien). There was, and still is, great interest in escapist fiction involving magic, fairies, witches and wizards, etc. - themes that have always interested me (to the extent of seriously studying European folklore, myths, legends and folk tales - as well as the psychology behind them). In spite of all the fantasy, the books involved many aspects of typical mundane lives of modern teenagers and older children. Young readers could easily identify with the key characters. The success of the Harry Potter books even popularised the idea of boarding schools. When at its most popular, I would often see adults reading the books (nearly always women). Whenever literature aimed at children and/or teenagers is found to appeal to an adult audience, it's a sign that there's something special about the 'recipe' used. Interestingly, many a Christian fundamentalist took it very seriously and it was widely and quite ridiculously condemned as 'satanic' - whatever that means.. I still read a great deal of children's fiction, more than I do adult fiction. I'm very fussy about both, but there are some brilliant children's authors out there - the less popular ones often proving to be the best, in my opinion. Of course, there is masses of children's fantasy fiction of a much higher literary quality, but due to lack of publicity, it's not anything like as successful as J K Rowling's output.

The Genius Test by Mensa I've never been very happy with the term 'genius' at the best of times - and less so having read the introductory section (which is why I bought the book - for 50p) - although I certainly find it useful. I'm now writing down my own thoughts about extraordinary thinking abilities, particularly seeing that I've been talking to another forum member who, although much younger than me, is an 'intellectually aspergic' equal to me, and to an uncanny degree. It's made me wonder about exactly why we are so different to most Aspies in this area. She is already an obsessive philomath, which I feel is essential to developing into a polymath. She's the only person I've ever known like this and given the right start (which I never had) she'll have a very promising future. To achieve this she needs a diagnosis so that others will no longer see her as merely inexplicably 'weird' or 'difficult', but rather as a highly intelligent and sensitive person on the autism spectrum.

Interesting. I keep being told that I should make a will. It's something I don't really like thinking about, and I couldn't possibly go and visit a solicitor, so how do people on the autistic spectrum themselves go about making wills?

Sorry, I've been neglecting the forum for a while, due to helping out various members behind the scenes. A BIG thank-you to "Mihaela" and "The ExoDus" for talking to me yesterday over "BitWise IM", you both have really helped me, I feel in myself so much better, almost a different person, so different that I could listen to music for pleasure or at least while I moved my arms around for exercise. Thank you too! I really enjoyed talking to you. I feel that I have almost completely transformed, talking to someone who is interested and interesting is the best thing in the world to a "socially isolated" individual such as myself. I hope the conversations will continue. That's wonderful! I like to feel that I'm not wasting my time and that I'm doing some good. ...but why this? : I have talked too soon it seems, never mind. I am it seems, always just going to be tolerated and not desired as someone to say hello to. I have removed "BitWise IM" from the "Dock Bar" of my Apple-Mac laptop, to prevent me from using it uninvited. I shall it seems remain "socially isolated", I have been for most of my life, so I shall carry on as before. Whatever went wrong between those posts - posted within an hour of one another? You don't explain. So confusing I'll reply to your later posts later

After being stitched up and requiring MP to intervene with DWP and Local NHS who were at best described as malicious and extremely manipulative failing to recognise NHS specialist's letters I was housebound and ill. I can well believe it. Stitching up is almost endemic in organisations like that. They do it to protect themselves. They did it with me too, and the lengths that they go to in their dishonesty are staggering. I've been told I have fibromyalgia symptoms and the carrier bag full of prescription medicines have over time brought my strengh back and I can get out and about. I still suffer times of chronic fatigue and need to sleep 2 or 3 hours at short notice- extremely frustrating. My brother (who died in his 40s ten years ago) suffered from fibromyalgia for years, and I'm 100% certain he was on the autism spectrum. The more I read up on this, the more I see a correlation between the two. Sadly we were never diagnosed, but I was (at last) only a few days ago. The issue I have is a parent passed away and I believe from what I'm told I will recieve some money- how much I'm not sure. The loss of my mother in 2012 triggered off an avalanche of problems, most of which are money-related (see my 'Desperate' thread). Unlike you, I've never received any state benefits. Currently I haven't received a penny from solicitors and find talking with them difficult. I was last to receive any money from them - after many months of suffering living off extremely little. I found them more than difficult, and currently I have a string of complaints being processed by the legal ombudsman. I'm led to believe that they have disposed of property assets of my parent with executors of will- I just need someone impartial to talk to? I'm pretty useless in understanding legal stuff, so I can't really help there. You need an advocate to speak for you. I eventually got one, but it wasn't easy, and due to my executive dysfunction I still don't understand half he says, and quickly forget most of the rest. I find his long visits very stressful, and need the next day to recuperate. Having said that, he has been able to help when dealing with scary officials - something I daren't even attempt. I'm unsure of amount liable to be given to me- but think property type value as talk of buying my own place off landlord a possibility. Haven't you even seen the will? I saw it very soon after my mother died, but I needed help in understanding it. Surely you have a right to see it. I'm neither well enough to work and I find stress makes me ill. Same here. That's why I joined this forum. I was desperate, confused and very worried. HELP PLEASE the inheritance just complicates my life. As it did to me. I simply can't handle it - for many reasons. I'm not used to dealing with money, and the whole idea scares me. If I become asset rich and cash poor- what do I live on? I kept on hearing that phrase, and for ages I didn't understand what it meant. To me assets will always be useful talents and skills. At present I've no idea what I can afford or how much money I have in the bank. It's just too stressful to think about. I never open bank letters, bills or anything official looking, and I shake whenever the post arrives. Luckily, at last, I've managed to find an organisation that will help me with all this. I'm hoping things will start to improve now. It was very difficult getting this to happen, but you can read the details in that 'desperate' thread. I'm sorry I can't help you any more. I hope others here will be able to.

I'm raging inside at the utter stupidity and cruelty of so-called professionals in the so-called Land of the Free. What with 'extraordinary rendition', 'enhanced interrogation techniques' (cheap euphemisms for kidnapping and torture) it now turns out that 'professionals' in that same country believe that autism is 'treatable' like a disease, and that their idea of 'treatment' is actually flagrant torture. Totally sickening - and all for refusing to take off his coat. It speaks volumes about his torturers and NT mentality. All those people willingly complying and apparently even enjoying the experience. What a cruel world we're forced to live in...

MAZE You silly thing, KK! I thought everyone knew that spiders crochet their webs, and bunnies knit their mazy warrens. That's why abandoned crochet hooks can often be seen flooding out of spouts in heavy rain - along with scampering spiders. One, strangely named Incey Wincey, became famous for this during the great storm of 1839. A village near here, Ince Blundell, site of his grave (sadly unmarked) was named after him, and another village, Ince, near Wigan, commemorates his birthplace. Az for mayziz they're amayzing! I once had great fun in the maze at Worden Park, near Leyland. I have a fixation about ancient turf mazes too.

That's a shame. I enjoyed our few chats on BW, and found you interesting. You were also easy to talk to and seemed to enjoy it. Where did you get to, Eustace and Laddo? I still talk regularly to two others from this forum and we get on so well that we're now we're planning to meet in person - so it looks like two meet-ups will actually be happening quite soon.

Added you, Eustace. There are now six of us from this forum on there!

That sounds wonderful! My local authority has nothing like that. If they had it would have saved me so much trouble. I was pushed around from one agency to another for ages.

Boredom I hated physics at school with a vengeance. The teacher was boring, as were most. It was only later that I learnt of its importance. I'd have answered 'cat' to your Rag-doll reply, Waterboatman. Adorable floppy little cats. I have a 13yo friend who, at the very mention of rag-doll cats, feels an uncontrollable need to have one (or more). As for Action Man, I find him far too aggressive for my liking! Barbie is equally obnoxious. I like pretty, unthreatening, dolls, and have several including an antique Armand Marseille doll (c1890) called Lettice. Very like this one: https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=armand+marseille&biw=1024&bih=489&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ei=zejBVOWMNfKP7Aa7uoCABQ&ved=0CCYQsAQ#imgdii=_&imgrc=Mp-wr6OU9L7UGM%253A%3ByEDzdY79v-cLLM%3Bhttp%253A%252F%252Fp2.la-img.com%252F1001%252F20050%252F6852618_1_l.jpg%3Bhttp%253A%252F%252Fwww.liveauctioneers.com%252Fitem%252F6852618%3B600%3B450

I have a young friend with severe scoliosis and brittle bone disease, who's confined to a wheelchair. He's recently got a 'power chair' which sound similar to what you have. I'll ask him if it's got the "freewheel". If not, he'll be wanting one himself!

Good reply Waterboatman! Good reply, Waterboatman! I cant discuss my feelings with them. i'm very uncomfortable discussing my feelings, and they are too at such things. we were never a family when one described his/her feelings. Same here actually. It got easier over the years, and probably will with you. We're slow at this kind of thing. I think my mother had Aspie traits, and we were never the kind of family who felt at ease discussing feelings, yet my parents were both very caring, even to the point of worrying overmuch about us. I'd just give them more of my time instead. they live walking distance, only a few minutes by foot. (i dont have a car). i'll just visit and be talktive. I'm sure that's all they'd need or expect from you. My aspie friend lives a few minutes walk from her mother and stepfather (and from me too). She often visits them, and although they find her difficult at times, I'm sure they'd be upset if she didn't. She's talkative with them, but can't express her feelings well. We all just accept this. Like you, I often prefer being with my cats than with people, but that doesn't mean I can't do without people. When I lost my parents, I lost part of myself. You've no need to worry about being who you are.

Hello and welcome, Tom. I see jealousy as a form of anxiety; it's unsettling and unwanted. Very likely this feeling is related to you needing to feel in control - and therefore secure, which makes a certain sense. A problem with aspies, but especially people with PDA (often misdiagnosed as having AS), is that feeling in control can become obsessive or even pathological. Clearly your jealously bothers you, and you don't like it. Does it affect your partner or your relationship as a whole? If so, you need help to realise that you really don't need to feel jealous - nobody does, for it does us no good at all; only harm. Aspies are know for their logical thinking, yet jealousy is entirely illogical. Long ago I learnt to see it for what it was, pointless and destructive, and can honestly say that I've not once felt jealous for many years. I feel much better as a result.

First of all, you don't say whether your parents are still living? It makes a big difference, for if they are you can at least discuss your feelings with them. I regret my own parents dying before they properly knew me and the reason as to why I was the way I was (Asperger's). Like you, I had no idea that I had it - until after they'd both gone. It hurts me so much to think about this, so I force myself to stay ever occupied and distracted. Of course you didn't do anything wrong. The very fact that you feel guilty suggests that you most likely aren't, and nor does it mean that you deserve the guilt, but it's probably your response at having regrets. If you'd intentionally harmed them, then that would be a good reason to feel guilty, but I doubt whether there's blame involved at all. There's no point in worrying about our regrets, for most of us do what we think is best at the time. In hindsight they may be seen as mistakes, but we can't change the past, and life is too short to dwell on the negatives.

It's defeatist and pessimistic to say that the idea has died. There are positive posts on this thread, and I'd be happy to meet people locally - Verbeia, Exodus and KalamityKat are all in my part of the world. I use Bitwise IM - I find it easier than Skype for me. Anyone here is welcome to chat to me there. I was at the video project yesterday and we all get on well, so there's no need to feel shy about meeting others on the spectrum.

I used Skype for a while, but I went back to my old IM system. I found Skype was too complex and fancy for my needs. I regularly chat to a couple of people on this forum - no voice or video though..

I had the visit yesterday - really nice and empathic people, and they've offered to do anything I need them to. It was brilliant, and all so easy and stressless! They can provide up to 11 hours of support a week, but I don't anything like that much. It's been well worth the wait, and they'll be contacting me again soon to get started.

Do sufferers have a problem putting things together or using hands, assembling/sorting which is what i have. I am dreadful at assembling flat pack furniture, basic DIY, basic car mechanical work. I'm like this too. I'm pretty useless at all those things however much I try. Yet I'm good at embroidery and building (and designing) valve-type radio equipment - receivers, transmitters, oscilloscopes, etc! I'm good at assembling little parts but not working with big unwieldy stuff. I think my flat-pack failures are partly due to struggling to make sense of the instructions. I don't like getting my hands dirty or oily either. I like messing about in the garden, but not digging or mowing lawns. Knots have always tied me in knots! I have problems with all kinds of other things too, such as setting digital clocks, video timers, programming TVs, using mobile phones in any way other than very basic, getting the hang of many computer-related processes. Facebook will always confuse me. I think I have an analogue mind! At my job now in the postal service it involves a lot of careful sorting I am very slow at sorting the mail it can take me up to four hours when most can do it around 30-45 min or less. Also takes me double time to deliver the mail some can do two walks in time it takes me to do one. I think I'd be slow at first, for I wouldn't want to make mistakes. My writing skills have gone rusty. Was just wondering if i have classic problem of 'nerds' who try their luck at 'practical' work using hands and are not suited to it? Luckily I've kept up my writing skills, as I've done a lot of writing throughout my life. I suppose I'm abit nerdish, but I'd never make a computer geek. I'm self-taught over using computers and I probably don't use them as efficiently as most. I seem to have my own way of doing things -anything - even peeling carrots! I suffer from slight dyspraxia, which certain simple processes less easy for me than for most. Another thing if i am diagnosed, i have not been yet, do i get a letter confirming this? If you don't get one, you can always ask for one but I imagine you would. I was wondering if i showed this to my bosses to show i have a condition they may relinquish and let me do the same delivery each day and get better over time My twin aspie cousins are postmen, and used to work together on the same round. Employers are legally obliged to make any reasonable adjustments once made aware of a diagnosis.

The most important bit is: The local council now have a legal duty to help me. Social Services can no longer ignore me and discriminate against me, being accused leaves one in limbo. They can't wriggle their way out of it now. The same applies in my case. We must all make sure that social services and councils, never neglect this duty. Our wellbeing depends on this.

London would freak me out (years ago I lived there for a while), but Ross-on-Wye would make me happy! By saying I'd like to live in a wood away from people and the 'ugliness' of towns, doesn't mean that I'd want to avoid people and towns entirely. However, I'd be content in taking them in considerably smaller doses than I do at present. I need time for pursuing my special interests, and people too often get in the way. This may sound selfish, but exercising my mind and enjoying beauty come first for me. With me, it's very much a spiritual thing - but not religious, I hasten to add! Materialism and money are anathema to me. It's all about simplifying my very complex life, and this idealistic dream has persistently haunted me ever since I was a child.

JoMarie, I'm so sorry to hear about your son's decline. He's clearly depressed, and it sounds very much as if he's developed catatonia, which is a recognised later complication of AS and often starts during adolescence. I suspect his experience of school may have initiated this. He may have understated how bad his school experience had been for him - just like I did with my own parents. I've also suffered short catatonic periods lasting from a few days to month - an effect of combining post-traumatic stress with my extreme AS sensitivities. http://www.depression-guide.com/aspergers/catatonia.htm Lorna Wing did some research on this: http://bjp.rcpsych.org/content/176/4/357.full.pdf+html How does he spend his time? What are are his special interests? It's a shame his diagnosis came so late, for his school life would have improved if he'd received suitable support at school. At least he got it decades before I did. You really must seek professional help for him as soon as you can. The good news is that it can easily be treated - usually within a few days.

My dream has always been to live in the middle of wood, well away from 'civilisation' - which I don't see as being particularly civilised! It's too scary, too busy, too noisy, too unnatural and false.

Jennet Preston and the Lancashire Witches by Jonathan Lumby - a well-reasoned book revealing new insights over the witch mania of 1612.

You're not alone, Templek. Holding on to memories, good and bad, is a very big part of my life. I try hard to push away the bad ones in favour of the good ones, but it doesn't always work. My childhood memories are quite vivid. Loss haunts my life, and has done so ever since I was a child. I'm forever yearning for what was, and for what could have been. My biggest losses were the loss of my childhood itself, followed by the gradual loss of my family. Memories can be very painful and I'm prone to sudden tears if I think too deeply about my life. Small triggers can set me off. Good memories make me sad at all that I've lost, but bad memories make me angry at the stupidity and cruelty of the NT world. I think it's common for aspies to have good long-term and poor short-term memory - often along with a good memory for facts and information. My poor short-term memory is one of the factors that causes my executive dysfunction.