sara8478

Check out my website, its very new, but i think it has all the info, any input would be welcome, http://stressedparents.co.nr/ My 2 1/2 year old son enjoys the cr�che, he has diagnosed Asperger's and possible ADHD, the staff are good with him and very accommodating.

Thanks for your support everyone, to answer you all: Yes I do get DLA and we get 11 hours a week support in form of a carer and that was after a fight. The funding came from the adult disabilities team as the children's team said there is no funding and when they went to panel they were terned down. The babies do get an afternoon a week at nursery paid by social services ( but as yet they have not let me leave, as they say they cannot cope with my sons special needs, so I have gone and stayed for weeks). I have to make it clear, I am not physically frightened of my partner and he has never hurt me in any way, but I am afraid of his anger. He is very controlling, but without meaning to be. I know that if I argue back or show anger then he will walk out even if I won't cope physically and if I really get angry he will drink drive and take an overdose. He is not meaning to control me in this way, but he might as well be. As for money, he does not own a bank card, but if I've just asked him to get money out (as I can't a lot of the time) or if he has my card or I didn't hide it, then he will spend lots. When he smashes things up it is usually because I have hidden the money and he wants it. I could not go to a womens refuge as I would not cope physically. When I found out that I was not entitled to anymore help my partner was already in the process of moving and now it doesn't effect his decisions. I don't think he uses it as a threat he just doesn't care at the time, it doesn't seem to come into it for him he is just thinking about his pain. When my partner is angry then he doesn't have any feelings for me or the kids, it wouldn't make a difference if one of the babies fell over in front of him, he would not acknowledge it. He has a whole mental health team, who are pushing for his formal diagnosis which at the last count was 36 weeks. We don't own our house and have lived off benefits since my back injury, so I'm not worried about money if we split up, just how I will cope physically. Finally, I used to believe my partner had serious mental health issues, but now I understand AS fully, I can explain most of what is happening is just someone with AS with no control over themselves and no boundaries. My AS daughter has boundaries to teach right from wrong and I do not except bad behavior and as a result she does not swear and does not hit or through things, I only wish I could set the same boundaries for him. I hope that has explained a lot. Sara8478

Hi, As I am physically disabled, my partner is at home with me as a carer as there are many, many things I can not do for myself and have times when I am stuck in bed for a few days. I also need help to look after the kid as physically (not mentally) this can get too much. We have a social worker for the whole family as I requested this to see if we could get some support as my partner does not cope. We have now been getting help 11hours a week to give my partner a brake. If he left, I would not be able to cope physically for more than a few days as I can not lift the babies or even walk my oldest to school and I have spoken to social services who said they cannot support me any further and that they would have to take the children every time I couldn't cope. I did of course argue the point many times, but they seem to be very certain that this is what would happen. If I can't get extra help at home and I can't look after my kids on my own then I don't seem to have many choices.

Hi, I am a 30year old mother of three who is disabled with a bad back and painful hands. I am awaiting opps to fix all three and I have dyslexia. I have a daughter that is 9 who has aspergers and dyslexia and 20month old twins (one has high functioning autism) and a 38 year old partner who has aspergers and depression. I have lived with my partner for 14 years and the hardest thing in my life is my relationship. He doesn't want to understand his aspergers and just thinks I am to blame for everything. I am always very careful about what I say or do encase he takes it can be taken the wrong way as this can cause a bad situation. I try to not get emotional but sometimes I end up getting angry with him as I don't get much help at all as he has an obsession with computers and reacts badly if I ask for help. He is very very sensitive and I can NEVER show anger even in a mild form even if there is a good reason for it. If I do then he walks out and leaves me even if there is no way of me coping physically. He has smashed many things in the house, spends lots of money every time he walks out , shouts and swears at me, drink drives, takes overdoses, lets the kids down and since the babies arrived he wants to leave us. Even though he knows that social services have said they will not support me, they will keep taking the children every time I don't cope. It feels like I put up with so much and if I put a step wrong I am punished for days and I can't say anything as I always have the threat of my children being taken if he leaves. I am always hiding my purse and keys and I just feel tired. We have been on courses for aspergers and I think I understand it very well, but he doesn't seem to. If anyone has advise let me know Sara8478

Have you considered using Firefox? Its much safer the IE7, it has loads of addons you can , well add on. It has tabs the same as IE7, give it a try, you can have firefox and IE7 installed at the same time with no problems at all. http://en.www.mozilla.com/en/firefox/

Introduction to the South London Autism Support Group This website is dedicated to sharing ideas & information about people with autistic spectrum disorders and living with people with autistic spectrum disorders. Mission: The mission of the South London Autism Support Group web page is to exchange information, resources & ideas specifically related to setting goals and planning for the future of people with autism, and other autistic spectrum disorders including Asperger's Syndrome. All visitors are invited to exchange their thoughts & concerns relevant to our theme. The type of information typically found on autism websites is covered here but there are plenty of websites that do a better job explaining what autism is and covering various general aspects of ASD. This website attempts to provide a different perspective, focusing on local issues including schools, colleges, diagnosis, support groups, resources and any other issues regarding Autism.

It is heart breaking , my daughter came home crying because she really want to get involved but due to her inabilty to understand proper social rules and childrens perseption of her nobody would allow her into thier groups to play.

Are you sure he is not actually playing with him? My daughter doesnt mix well at school , but had one friend who she would play with everyday , this girl understood her personality and kind of gelled with her, although unfortunatly she left last term so she is alone again.

Ebay has a few , dont know about location tho' Ebay tv search

Im nearly 40 (im sara's husband), i believe i have aspergers , i still like childrens toys, my daughter 8 - diagnosed aspergers loves her toys , ASD children love things more than ppl , its a comfort thing , they control and understand the things , they are very predictable.

Heres one, new , its for bromley area, Bromley Autistic Trust Bromley Autistic Trust is a specialist charity committed to improving the quality of life of people of all ages with an Autistic Spectrum Disorder (ASD) and to supporting those who care for them. Its focus is on people living in Bromley. The Trust was established in 1981. We provide assistance both for families with an autistic child and for adults with autism or Asperger Syndrome. As a result of dedicated and sustained efforts, the Trust now has three registered homes, four supported living flats and a day service for up to 16 adults with an Autistic Spectrum Disorder. We also run a Family Support Service which is helping or has helped at least 600 families. Furthermore there is a well-based and respected programme raising public and professional awareness of the needs of people with Autistic Spectrum Disorders. This website has been created to increase public awareness of the Bromley Autistic Trust and should prove to be a valuable resource and show the support we are able to offer. To navigate, simply use the menu on the top right.

I am a qualified hgv 1 & 2 driver so am fully competent in complex manual gearboxes (*5&splitter - 4 on 4 range change*) , but have had a few auto cars and love them , its just so much easier and far less hassle in stop start traffic. I wouldnt go back to a manual unless i had to. *Basically a splitter is like half a gear and range change is high and low ratio , ie start in 1 and go up to 4 , then up to high range and back to 1 , giving 8 gears in total.

I havent got time to read all the replies , but my 8yr old girl had similar issues (aspie & dyslexia) , we arranged a meeting between the head , senco , autistic trust representative and complex communications lady , we discussed what would and wouldnt be tolerated and the words BULLYING and DISCRIMINATION were used repeatedly , we told the school we would keep her home if teachers buulied her and discriminated against her , and we would get a doctors note saying she was suffering from stress due to bullying if the matter wasnt solved , also if it got to that point we would inform the local papers and MP. She does not get punished for her symptoms of asperger's anymore. I hope this helps , ive got to go and get her ready for school now , GOOD LUCK