bid
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Everything posted by bid
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Hi Julia, I can empathise with your situation, as my son was out of school for 6 months with a breakdown when he was 14/15. However, I don't think you can just 'hope that all will come good in the end'. It may be that you have to think creatively to get your DD back to engaging with other people and the world. You say she is very interested in photography. I would start there, by setting her a project to research good cameras online, but then she has to come with you to a specialist camera shop in order to buy it. The reason I would go to a specialist shop is that the staff there will be very enthusiatic and knowledgable about photography, which might draw her out and they are usually small shops with few people, unlike one of the big chains. Then I would sign the two of you up for a part-time adult photography course at your local FE college...personally I wouldn't ask her, I would tell her this is what we are going to do. I know it's very, very hard but she must be gently pushed to re-engage with the world, and using a specialist interest is the most likely way of encouraging this. Good luck, Bid
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Hi Equi...I know you are new to the forum, but there are many adults here with AS, including myself! I have been with my DH for nearly 20 years, and I do find it concerning that you talk about people with AS in this way Bid
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The errors of attribution! and the rest!
bid replied to Fourthdimension's topic in General Discussion
Well, I would interpret the following to be you speaking for people with AS: And in your thread 'A stranger in a strange world' you also say: Again, I interpret this as you speaking for everyone with AS. If that wasn't your intention, then apologies, but that is how it appears to me Bid -
Hi again FD, I don't mean this in an unkind way, but everything you write is all about you. Increasingly I'm aware that I am very, very old school. But I was brought up to think that it is important to give something back. As a child, on two occasions my parents brought home to live with us indiviuals who were going through difficult times, such as depression. I've never been as alturistic as that, but as an adult I always did voluntary work when I was at home with young children, and now work with young people with complex needs. Again it's probably very old-fashioned, and consequently unpopular, but I think looking outwards rather than constantly focusing on yourself, will ultimately help you to be a happier, more balanced person. Bid ETA: I've just read a later post of yours where you say you are very busy as a student with studying and working so voluntary work isn't possible. You also say that you help other students with work at times, and I think this is an excellent thing to do, as it gives you a focus away from your own difficulties, and you may end up with some new mates too
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That's lovely Tally Over half term, I met up with my two close friends from student days...one from Canada I hadn't seen for 20 odd years. I posted a wonderful piccie on FB of the three of us circa 1988...it was really funny to see my Canadian mate, who now has a grey beard and a tum and looks a bit like Father Christmas! And back in the day he was sooo dishy Oh, and when I explained about my AS dx, he laughed and said "I just thought you were a bit weird!" hehehe I hope you have as much fun as I did when you meet up with your old friends <'> Bid
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The errors of attribution! and the rest!
bid replied to Fourthdimension's topic in General Discussion
What do you get if you cross a sheep with a kangaroo? A woolly jumper!! Ba-dum tsh -
Oh dear, but as someone who had a room opposite a Smiths fan when I was at uni in the 80s this did make me chuckle! Bid
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The errors of attribution! and the rest!
bid replied to Fourthdimension's topic in General Discussion
Hi FD, This is now your third post where you attribute your views to everyone with autism! I have a dx of AS, and I have a very, very different view of the world and AS compared to you. Of course on a forum we can all express our opinions. But please stop talking about 'them' and 'us'. In the nicest possible way, you don't speak for me! Bid -
While I'm sorry that you feel this way, Fourthdimension, not everyone with AS feels like this. It may not feel like it to you at the moment, but it is perfectly possible for people with AS to be happy with their lives and who they are. Have you thought about doing thngs that help you look outwards? I'm a firm believer in the positive power of doing things for others. There are plently of projects that need volunteers. You could perhaps apply your interest in autism in a practical way, and volunteer to work with adults or young people with severe autism. I hope you find a more positive place soon. Bid
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That's wonderful Tally! Bid <'>
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There has been more than one forum discussion about this previously, but my personal opinion is that it is wrong for anyone to say that they have AS unless they have a formal dx. A very dim view would be taken if someone self-diagnosed any other serious condtion, and then went on to tell others that they categorically had it. Bid
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My very personal experience was that I didn't tell anyone I had AS before I was diagnosed. A few people close to me knew I had been referred (oh, and the forum ), but I had an absolute horror of telling people I 'had AS' only to find out at my assessment that I didn't! I felt that it would be lying to say I had AS before a dx. Once I had been formally diagnosed I told my wider family and my line manager and my team. I have had a largely very positive experience around dx, except from my in-laws I have always tried very hard to look outwards and push myself to do as many of the things that I find difficult as possible. But that's just me Bid
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Dekra, I'm sorry too if I made you feel knocked down <'> My DH is head of maths at a special school, so I probably hear too much about numeracy skills My son with ASD was also my eldest, and I know what you mean about any subsequent children. If he had been my second, I would have been flagging up concerns almost from when he was a tiny baby, but you just think that must be the norm. Bid
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Hi jlogan, I agree with Justine. It's important to equip our children as much as we can for adult life, and a clear daily/night-time routine is central to this in my opinion. My son who has AS, ADHD and Dyspraxia is an adult now, who lives independently. Although by inclination he is a nocturnal sort of person, he always had clear routines at home, and we maintained a largely 'normal' pattern of waking and sleeping. As an adult he has chosen to work mainly late shifts, which I think fits in with his prefered lifestyle. But he is still perfectly able to work early shifts when necessary, etc. It really is so important to remember that, however 'unfair' we may feel it to be, we have to equip our children to be able to function as independently as possible in the 'normal' world...as adults they can't exclusively inhabit an 'autistic' world if we want them to have any degree of independence. I would think that the SW is suggesting removing the reptiles from your son's room to make it as low-stimulation as possible? Bid
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What about clothes-pegging a sheet or towel to your curtains to block out more light until the blinds are fitted? Bid
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Hi dekra, I think it's very important to consider that the ability to count to a high number doesn't indicate whether a child has a good understanding of numeracy that is age appropriate, or whether they are actually advanced in numeracy. For example, being able to say numbers from 1 to 69 is not the same as understanding the concept that the numbers 1 to 5 can correlate to 5 actual objects, which another nursery age child might have grasped. The nursery age child who can do the latter is actually more advanced in numeracy than the child who can count to a high number. HTH Bid
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I did actually press that earlier today in a spirit of experimentation when I was trying to get the drop down to work...all that appeared to happen was that I got logged out?? ETA: A-ha!! The drop down does work if I use Firefox!
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Thanks Darkshine...I can access messages from my phone, like now, and when I have a notification I can access them via that, so thanks I will also try another browser and see if the drop down works any better. Bid