llisa32

Thanks for all this info All the school did re EP inout was give me a list of ed psch's they knew other parents had had dealings with! We are now seeing one from the local council which was arranged by Cahms specialist - I';m hoping that because it will be the same ed psch that goes into the lea schools she will have a good idea of what schools can and do offer and which I suspect mine have never done before

Thanks Karen - He's at a fee paying school and has an IEP regarding 'Dyslexia' with mention of current issues like anxiety re change, unable to copy down from whiteboard etc. He is behind his peers with Maths and English currently, but mostly I believe due to struggling on the processing side of things and because of his now hatred of writing. Although he will write required amount in subjects like geography and Science. Because he's always noticed the ability of those around him I am really worried about the impact of him sitting the tests - mostly just the english and maths ones. he will not care if other children struggle, he will only notice the few that whizz thru with ease. School have said the tests are 'a guide' , and I know they are moving towards veing streamed. My concern is that J will end up being streamed in a class where the work is below his ability and be bored and unmotivated even more so than currently.

Thanks for that Flora, I needed to hear that The last few weeks have been absolutely yeeuch!! - they keep asking me what I think they should do...I suggest stuff and they do their own thing! - they have also been implying the last few weeks that because he's so bright he's just being naughty when refusing to do extra writing/maths etc and that if he tried harder it would all get suddenly easier! After confirming to me this week that he does seem to take longer than the other kids 'processing info' and they already know he's very slow at writing and quite messy - hence y he hates it - they then say he'll do the exams with all the rest! He's already gone down a couple of grades this term, and they know we have a ton of assessments coming up in December - I don't get their attitude at the moment. I told J this week he had to at least 'try' some writing and maths this week else no TV - so he has tried some, but then in school when he's done a bit they say things like 'there, that weasn't so bad - do some more! when actually it took a whole lot of effort for him to do what he's done and I've had no chance at all of getting any homework done this week. When I complained that mental arithmatic was really difficult for him and that could they find ways to help him with that - maybe using visuals of the q's etc they said it's something he needs to get used to! I'm hoping that although our 'official' ed psch appt is not till later on in Dec when I speak to her this morning she will be helpful. I don't think the school know anything about anything other than Dyslexia unfortunately as when I asked the Senco and LSU teacher what a speech and language assessment entailed they didn't know! - if they'd had other kiddies thru school with similar problems surely they would?

Happy Birthday Mel <'> Hope you have a great day

Thanks Mel <'> , I'm curious because J is due to take some 'school tests' in a couple of weeks, and they will be done in exam conditions - ie all kids in a room, paper in front of them etc. I've asked if J will be given any support and so far all I've been told is that he will be in the room with the other kids but it will be 'handled sensitively' - I've no idea what that means at the moment, and my main concern is that his already very low self esteem will take yet another battering when he see's the other kids getting on with the task and he's not. I don't see how they can provide 'support' unless he's in a room on his own with a TA The tests are to provide 'a guide' apprently - which I assume is a guide to progress and we already know my son has lost progress quite substantially in enlgish and maths since sept and going into year 3. I'm speaking to the Ed Psych this morning but was just curious whats been the case with other children

Hi, I was wondering if your children that are at mainstream school take exams/tests in the same format as other non sen children? Ie..do they sit in the same room as the other kids and complete a timed test same as the others? Or do they complete in a seperate room with a teacher/ta for support and are given extra time to complete? I'm thinking particularly in relation to children with writing/processing difficulties. Much appreciate any responses Thanks <'>

I think you should continue to be friendly....he's probably very very shy and maybe particularly so around young ladies - note I gave you the benefit of 'young' then I spose........ I practically had to trick my hubby into speaking to me and then asking me out....trust me he's glad now - honest! But seriously....keep up with the trying, I'm sure he will converse etc at some point

What happend?? - did u speak and he no answer?? or he's gone into hiding?

Hiya <'> I've had...and do have similar problems, especially with relation to what 'the teacher said' and my interpretation of that versus my son's. I only have the one child so also have no immediate 'comparison' other than nephews/friends etc. I think I would perhaps ask your son's teacher to tell you what the homework is in front of yr son before you leave school each day - is this possible? - if it's said to you in front of him he may be more accepting of your explanation. It is really frustrating and I don't really have any great answers at the moment unfortunately I would ask the teacher to make the homework as 'flexible' as possible in terms of interpretation and ask her to explain that to yr son - stuff like 'any clock' or with mine it;s been 'any pencil' 'and box' etc etc. Mine takes very literally and to the letter what the teacher has said...any deviation and he is not happy I hope someone can come along and give you some better suggestions <'> Good luck

Really sorry about your news Bard <'> Will be thinking of all of you <'> Take care x

He's got an IEP which at moment just states requiring help with reading, forming letters and sentances and that he should not be copying from a board as finding it difficult - without the ed psch its been difficult to get anything else added to it - but they are definately aware he has processing problems but at the moment seem inflexible to change I don;'t know if I just have to 'lump it' at the moment until all the assessments are finished (end dec) or what? he's gonna do dreadfully in the school tests and I'm really worried about them

Hi All, I've been back and forth to school like a yo yo for the past few weeks, a few times at schools instigation and a couple at mine. Seems that J has stopped refusing to go to school in the mornings because he just decided he would down tools in english and maths instead! So...have been working with the teachers since last week and working with j at home trying to find ways to entice him into producing some writing etc. So yesterday they sent him off to do his 'diary writing' with one of his old teachers from year 2 - so just him and her in a classroom - lo and behold 12 lines were produced!.....if anyone has thoughts on y that worked pls comment. (plus I'd done some prep work doing something they called 'scafolding' with him, and the teacher he went off with did same) Now...I went and got his maths and english books from the classroom tonight before we left, and found out the following: Despite knowing that he is unable to copy from the board and they should do this for him and that he seems completely unable to cope with processing information in the form of questions and then formulating an answer........I look in his maths book and just see two pages of answers with no questions..... I asked J and another boy that were in the class 'how were you given the questions to get to these answers?'...they said mrs teacher sits and her desk and calls out the question and we write down the answerr!!!! And it was questions like 'how many days in a year' so mixing the numbers with words...if that makes sense! In fact...hope this whole thing makes sense...I'm so cross I can't think straight!! it's eactly the type of task he really struggles with and would need it visually displayed as well as a few repeats before he gave any answer - needless to say he got 4 outta 16! What do I do?? Ed psch appts not till after they break up in Decemner...I just found out they have all got 'school tests' the week before they break up - his results on them will not match his ability....help!!!!

He's 8 and very verbal

Hoorayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!! I am sooo chuffed for you!! - well done! <'> <'>

Hi - hopefully this isn't a dumb question...but what happens in an initial speech and language therapy meeting with a child What sort of activities, questions, what do they look for?? Any info much appreciated Thanks <'>

Very VERY good idea! - he seems to be making friendly gestures...so at the very least you're on the way to making a friend - whether he turns out to be aspie or not. He may well be an aspie - but have no idea he is Good luck for Tuesday - well done!! Did you speak with party goer blokey?

Great way to pass the time!! - eye candy and chocolate pudding! <'> Don't forget it's part of a sister's role to annoy 'big sis' ....did you tell her you thought she didn't get the looks??

Mumble - just pm'd u <'> It does sound very much like a panic attaack - they are scary and horrible but they do go away...really important that you try and breathe slowly and deeply... It will pass and most of them have had them but tis a bit of a shock if you've not had one before <'> <'>

Thanks for the responses.. <'> Just to clarify my thoughts on this post. I have no difficulty in accepting J as different at all - afterall he is! ...and a very cute different too! It was just the fact that he has now noticed and acknowledged it and at the moment is obs not very happy about it...most kids I guess want to be the 'same' as their peers. Question for any adult aspies...do you recall noticing being 'different' when you were younger? - do you remember any specific instances/events that made you feel that way?

Oh yeuch!!!!!! and ARGGGHHH After just having a convs about school and english and maths etc....J said he felt different to his classmates and he doesn't like his life!! Whilst I think the 'doesn't like his life' may be as a direct result of the convs about school, I'm really upset that he said he feels different...I thought he prob did feel different....but that now seems to me much worse now that he has said those immortal words Can an 8 yr old feel 'different'? - I guess so, but yeuch....to have him acknowledge that just made me so sad - makes me think what must be going through his mind all the time??

Thanks Bard. I think he's being really stubborn because he's finding those particular 2 subjects difficult. Has been the same with everything in and out of school since he was small...smallest hint of failure and he will give up. He doesn't want to run the risk of being 'wrong' or messing something up - and will then just not even try. The fact that he's willing to give up the loves of his life (xbox/[playstaion/tv) and still not do the work to me implies that he badly doesn't want to do it. I think he needs more encouragement that will not feel like enforcement to him. He may well be being overly stubborn bordering on naughty over these 2 subjects cos he feels at the moment that no one is 'helping' him and he's got really fed up - he doesn't feel in control of his day and I suspect eliminating the 2 subjects causing him the most grief are helping him get thru it.

Hi Minxygirl - whats PDA please? Thanks

Hi...I'd asked my son's form teacher for an update regarding how J was getting on with English and Maths at the moment - given that we have an Ed Psch appointment next month. Apparently he's refusing to do any english work or maths work fairly frequently and the teachers are just starting to think he's being 'naughty' more so than finding it difficult. He's definately been finding english difficult, has trouble with his writing, and struggles with non fiction writing/comprehension and diary writing. Maths I've yet to figure out why he no longer likes the subject - he just says it's 'hard' but i think it's porbably to do with the fact they have to write out sums more now and the paper they use has very small graph squares on. If he gets homework most times he won't do it without a fight - if at all. He'd rather loose tv, playstation or xbox than do it. I have a meeting with the teachers in the morning...I feel like they think we should be 'threatening' or punishing' him more to 'make' him do it as one of their comments today was 'we can't 'make' him do the work. His LSU teacher has confirmed today that he def struggles with 'why' you have to write in full sentances (subject to debate I know) J just doesn't see the point. But at the moment he only seems to be bothered with subjects he has an interest in or finds easy and everything else he;s not interested in at all. But because he makes comments to the teachers like 'I don't want a job ' or 'I don't need english and maths for the job I'll do' and just shrugs etc they just think he's being either lazy/stubborn/naughty or all 3. We're still part way thru diagnosis at mo and next month have a disco, ADOS and ed psch appt all in the space of 2 weeks! What do you guys think in the meantime? - do you have/had the same issues at school with your kids? - what did you do? what should I do??

Thats fantastic Witsend you must be feeling hugely relieved and happy Really pleased for you both <'> , it must make such a difference when you wake up each day Great!!

Thats exactly the line I just read and that stood out for me!! - it's how I'm trying to explain things to J's dad. Life is 'different' not wrong or bad I think you're right re the Media lately...it does seem to have swung slightly towards a better understanding - fingers crossed it continues