jools Report post Posted October 13, 2006 well after drip feeding him info for the last month or so i felt tonight was the right time to tell G he has ASD. he had invited a boy fron his class over for tea. i had reservations because although they seem to get on at school this is the first time he has been here. i'm saying invited, but actually this other boy asked if he could come and G then asked me so i agreed........thought we should give it ago. it was interesting.......lol G hardly spoke a word to him choosing to do his normal after school routine of ignoring everyone unless absolutely necessary and doing his own thing. he has had friends over before and does teh same but the other two boys who come over are used to it. they know what he is like and are happy to let him get on with it. this boy tonight though just got frustrated and bored. G couldn't see what the fuss was about. he'd had his tea so why didn't he just go and find something to do instead of bugging him.....lol anyway after a few tears and tantrums over various things this other child went home and i sat him down. i explained that it had been confirmed that he had ASD. i kept if simple saying that it meant he thinks differently from us sometimes but that doesn't mean he or us think wrongly. his reply was that he thinks right for him and we think right for us but nobody is right or wrong. he also thinks ASD sounds cool. i told him if and when he had any questions we would answer honestly and off he went. that was that! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
oxgirl Report post Posted October 13, 2006 well after drip feeding him info for the last month or so i felt tonight was the right time to tell G he has ASD. he had invited a boy fron his class over for tea. i had reservations because although they seem to get on at school this is the first time he has been here. i'm saying invited, but actually this other boy asked if he could come and G then asked me so i agreed........thought we should give it ago. it was interesting.......lol G hardly spoke a word to him choosing to do his normal after school routine of ignoring everyone unless absolutely necessary and doing his own thing. he has had friends over before and does teh same but the other two boys who come over are used to it. they know what he is like and are happy to let him get on with it. this boy tonight though just got frustrated and bored. G couldn't see what the fuss was about. he'd had his tea so why didn't he just go and find something to do instead of bugging him.....lol anyway after a few tears and tantrums over various things this other child went home and i sat him down. i explained that it had been confirmed that he had ASD. i kept if simple saying that it meant he thinks differently from us sometimes but that doesn't mean he or us think wrongly. his reply was that he thinks right for him and we think right for us but nobody is right or wrong. he also thinks ASD sounds cool. i told him if and when he had any questions we would answer honestly and off he went. that was that! Good for you!! <'> I certainly think it's good to keep things light and simple at first, you can always go into more detail as the weeks and months go on and things crop up. Sounds like you handled it really well, good on ya! I remember breaking my heart for months over when and how and if I should tell my son, but in the end it was such an anti-climax! I think, once I'd finally plucked up courage to tell him, that his response was, 'oh, okay', or something equally as laid back!! ~ Mel ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
danielsmum Report post Posted October 13, 2006 well done!! daniel has only just been diagnosed and is 6 so i dont know if he will grow up just knowing or if ill have to tell him, but i may have to explain y he dont get invited to b day parties and stuff like his bros, hope he take it as well xx Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
oracle Report post Posted October 13, 2006 The journey of a 1000 miles always begins with the first step. You have done all that you need to do for now - the nest step is if and when he begins to ask you questions. Again I would keep it simple and try and sound as positive as you can. I think he has a great way of thinking for what it's worth - sounds like an OK young man to me Better to grow up with and into a dx then to feel it like a sledge hammer blow. Oracle Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
loulou Report post Posted October 13, 2006 Hi, Well done . Sounds like G took it really well. Can i ask how old he is? Kai (8) doesn't quite know he has ASD, but he knows he has a "special brain". He also has started to notice he is different. Loulou x Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jericho Report post Posted October 13, 2006 Well done. I'm still not sure about how or when to tell my 6yr-old. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bagpuss Report post Posted October 13, 2006 Well done...it must of been tough and think you handled it brilliantly Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jools Report post Posted October 13, 2006 (edited) he is 9 and i have to say it wasn't as difficult as i thought it was going to be. i think it helped that we have been drip feeding him info, planting the seed as it were. i also have books lying around about aspergers and asd so it wasn't something mentioned out of the blue. and he went straight to his dad to tell him....bless! Edited October 13, 2006 by jools Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
butterfingersbimbo Report post Posted October 14, 2006 wow sounds like G is a smart lad! I have only recently told el that she has asd, but like you having been planting the seed for a long time. she has known about the adhd for a couple of years as she is on meds for this, but have dilly dallied about the asd as i thought it would be really difficult to explain. in the end a friend of mine with an aspie son lent me a book that she read with him. her son came running up to us on the way to school shouting "i have asd and so does el!!!" which did make me laugh! it occured to me that its far more daunting as a parent than as a child! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chriss Report post Posted October 14, 2006 I know of someone who only found out they had aspergers when their Doctor mentioned it when they were 17 ,thinking he was fully aware of it. His parents thought they were helping him by not telling him - they weren't. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites