Didn't want to go to school today

[llisa32]

Hi,

 

So glad I found this forum a couple of months ago as I feel like I'm on a merry go round at the mo!

 

For the first time J made serious efforts not to go to school today...its boring, he hates it and hence eventually got him

to the school car park late. Then spent another 10 mins htreatening to go get the headmaster if he didn't get out the car to go into school.

 

We went into his classroom, he stomped past mrs 'nice' teacher with a face like thunder, she for once noticed something was up and asked me what the matter with him was. I said I have no idea, he won't talk to me yet, he just doesn't want to be here today and says he hates it and it's boring. I have to admit I left him there this morning half hoping he would throw a mjor paddy at school instead of saving it for me later - no such luck

 

So I picked him up - teacher said 'oh he's been fine'

 

But we get to the car, he refused to talk...eventually said he wanted to go to nannys', he then shut himself in the bedroom there and wouldn't speak or come out. Mums not too good on her feet at the mo so I didn't want to leave him there with the potential for a paddy - almost had a huge one ...the fliipin puppy managed to swipe one of his digimon soft toys!!! I thought J was gonna kill the dog - luckily I got hold of it quickly, but it didn't do much to improve his mood.

 

I brought him home and after another hour or so I managed to find out that they had to write storys in class yesterday and he managed about half a page, but other kids managed 4 pages!.....he said theres no point telling me what the problem is because it';s the law he has to go to school and thereofre I can't help!

 

Is it possible you think that its the story writing from yesterday thats given him the major grumps?....he's told me tonite he doesn't need to 'learn' and go to school cos he doesn't want a job ands that he can live in my house when I die! - nice ! - nothing like saying what you mean

[Bard]

.he's told me tonite he doesn't need to 'learn' and go to school cos he doesn't want a job ands that he can live in my house when I die! - nice ! - nothing like saying what you mean

 

 

B does this on a fairly regular basis. He's just being logical, he asked me if I had made a will at one point, then several hours later, he gave me a list of my possessions that he wanted to inherit. He was worried that my daughter wouldn't appreciate my rock collection, carvings, historical artefacts, embroidered cushions etc.

I told him that when I died, he could keep anything on his list that was spelt correctly. Next day I was given a redraft. It's in the safe, along with the wills!

[seasparrow]

When I was at school I really disliked all my 'theory' lessons. Any lesson that involved writing or just sitting at a desk doing written work. I did however love all my practical lessons - the 'hands on' lessons. That is where I was the happiest.

 

In my English class I wrote a short story - eventually - and I was given a certificate for my work. The year later I gave the same piece of work in and I got graded a B. I used the same piece in my third year and was given a C - and I had the same teacher each year. I told him what I had done and that my grade got less each year and he just said it got less because I was capable of doing better (with a smile on his face because I had kinda cheated).

 

I also used to use same written work between different classes and no1 knew. Basically, I really really did not like writing and I did not see the importance of an education. It was never explained to me in a way that I could understand. To this day I still dont really understand the importance as people can 'naturally' do jobs with no training or formal education.

 

My parents bought me a computer - ZX81 - which was the first home computer out (I think). They spent about 4 months learning how to use it so they could show me how to use it. Within half an hour I had already learnt more that they had learnt in those 4 months. My computer skills, which are very good, have all been self-taught. I love computers!!!

 

 

When I was a teen at home I also was quite eager for my parents to 'hurry up and die' so that I would inherit everything. Not because I hated them but because I am a very impatient person and I didn't want to wait. I also made it clear that my brother was getting nothing! I kept this up for most of my teen years and into my early 20's. I gave up after I moved out and got a life of my own. Now I hope they don't die.

 

And yes... it was a logical way for me to think. But I failed to look at the impact of how their death would have affected me.

Edited June 13, 2007 by seasparrow

[JsMum]

Just a few questions about the puppy?

 

Is the puppy new?

How Long Have you had the puppy?

Does the puppy have a safe area in the home, like a crate?

Do you show the puppy lots of fuss in front of your son?

Does he know that while he is at school, you are at home to spend the day with the Puppy?

 

JsMum

[llisa32]

Hi J'smum....It's my mum's puppy and J loves him to death usually. Just unfortunate that he picked the wrong day to grab a digimon soft toy and make a run for it!

 

My mums got 2 westies, with the younger being the 'puppy', J can't wait to see them usually and calls them his friends so I think nothing to do with the puppy yesterday, just J has had a digimon crazy 3 weeks now...as in he's always had the digimons along with pokeman,,but digimon are the ones currently rulling every bit of playtime, bedtime, bathtime, video, tv etc etc .......

 

he wants a puppy of his own that can live at our house but so far I'm refusing to have one, both J and hubby would love one but J's at school and hubby at work, and I work from home a lot so they think I can do the training and cleaning up etc! - no way hose I am currently saying

[JsMum]

If it had of been you did of had a new puppy I was going with the been jellious of the puppy only because J did when we got ours, we also went throw issues with chewed favourate toys and wanting to kill her, but now we have a safe place for her which is her den which is a crate that has been made really cosy and she can stay in their rather than chew Js toys.

 

J was very put out when I hugged and patted the puppy and use to just push her off me and said my mummy not your go away, so it did take ages, plus he didnt like the fact that the puppy was here all day and he was at school.

 

so that was why I was asking questions as I wondered if you had a new puppy?

 

I would keep a diary and just let your son see that you are listening and understand that school maybe hard.

 

Bullying maybe something to consider, or just that he finds it difficult to be in an environment that he may find too overwhelming.

 

National Autistic Society have some little booklets at what kinds of challenges produce children with ASD and it has helpful ideas how to make the classroom and playground less stressful and things the teacher can put in place to help him feel more settled.

 

If things continue maybe writing a short letter explaining the difficulties that your son seems to be having reguarding school and they may be able to offer further support and look at what work he is doing and if anything needs atering so help him.

 

JsMum

[di30]

HIYA LLISA32

 

SO SORRY TO HERE OF YOUR ISSUES TODAY WITH J

ITS NOT EASY IS IT ?

 

WITH DAN I GET THIS MOST DAYS, ESPECIALLY IF THERE WAS SOMETHING HE WAS MEANT TO DO AT SCHOOL OR FOR HOMEWORK THAT HE DIDN'T COMPLETE, HE THOUGHT THE FRENCH SPEAKING TEST WAS MONDAY JUST GONE AND WAS UP ALL NIGHT WORRYING THE NIGHT BEFORE ABOUT IT, WE MADE A POINT OF SEEING THE HEAD OF YEAR 7, TO EXPLAIN HIS DIFFICULTIES AND ANXIETIES WITH DOING THIS IN FRONT OF THE WHOLE CLASS, WE HAD THEN FOUND OUT IT IS NOT UNTIL THIS FRIDAY !!!

SO I HAVE TRIED HELPING DAN THROUGH THIS BY GOING OVER HIS WORK WITH HIM, BUT NOW HE FEELS A LOT WORSE, MORE EXPLAINING TO DO TO THE HEAD AGAIN IT WILL HAVE TO BE.

 

DAN SAID HE KNOWS HE MUST DO THIS AND IS HOPING HE CAN DO THIS LIKE IN ANOTHER ROOM OR SO, HOPEFULLY THEY WILL RESOLVE THIS DUE TO HIS HIGH ANXIETY LEVELS IN WHICH ALL STAFF MEMBERS SHOULD NOW BE AWARE OF.

 

GOOD LUCK TO YOUR J.

DAN IS VERY COMPLIANT IN SCHOOL/LESSONS AND IS THE OPPOSITE AT HOME, I CAN LOOK OUT BASICALLY.

 

GOOD LUCK TO YOU TOO HON.

 

LUV DI X