He'll just have to get used to it!!

[llisa32]

Haven't posted much for a while but have to just have a ickle rant

 

J has a school 'production' that he has to take part in this week - they have been practising at school for weeks and last weeks rehersals impacted his school routine so much by Friday he was verging on a mega meltdown so I picked him up from school early to start relaxing sooner before going back today.

 

I got the full run down on timings for this week re the 'production' and it is totally gonna disrupt the next 2 evenings - basically he'll get an hour and a bit at home before having to go back to school, then 'perform to an audience' and won't finish until already an hour after his bed time! - you can imagine how late he's gonna get to sleep after being so hyped and not having had much time beforehand to watch fav tv progs etc

 

Then...he breaks up on thursday at 11.20am!! - in my mind I was thinking it's not worth going into skool after 2 late nights and then a mega early finish on thursday - he'll be worn out and grumpy as hell on thursday morning, but teacher says he has to be in, and now I've just had my mother saying 'he'll just have to get used to doing this sort of thing like all the other kids!!

 

Trying to explain it's not so much the doing it, it's the disruption in routine thats gonna cause angst (plus a bit of the doing it cos he does not like taking part) and I can just see him building a mega tantrum .

 

I know that doing stuff like this can build confidence in some kids, but I totally resent the disruption this week and feel really annoyed that he and I are gonna 'have to go thru it'.

 

I'm probably over reacting, but I cannot stop feeling like this is not something he should be 'having to do' - if he'd wanted to be an actor i'd have sent him to performing arts skool!!

[Pippin]

If it were me I'd say "stuff the teacher" and not send him in on Thursday.....what are they going to do about it?? I always used to ignore my Mother too. Owning an Autie has toughened me up over the years!!!! I know what you mean though......."they" find it so difficult to understand why are kids cant just adapt to changes like the others can.

[Mumble]

You're not over-reacting <'> <'> <'> You're looking out for your son's needs - that's all

 

What rationale do the school give for him having to be in it? Maybe it is too late to change now, but maybe they will consider different roles he could have in future, especially now you have the dx? As for the mother?? Hmm, not sure - mothers - grrrrrr

 

Not quite feelin' up to thumpin' things but I'll do so virtually for you :angry:

[Kazzen161]

The school I work in does the same thing. A lot of parents were not happy about their (junior aged) children having to come back for the production and being up late. The children were fit for nothing the next day.

 

He could always develop a bug on the Thursday, or the Wednesday night

[sueeltringham]

We had a similar situation at Christmas with school productions and I just told school that ds would only attend one of the evening's shows and he didn't make it in the next day, either! Tough! As it turned out, loads of the other kids found two evening and two daytime performances incredibly difficult, so then I felt even more justified (and smug). After the event, the teachers admitted I had made the right decision. You know your son and his capabilities and have to think of his needs 24 hours, so do as you feel is best for all of you!

 

sue

[Bard]

This teacher is a great believer in duvet days for children.

Exhausted and stressed children learn very little other than how to endure, or how to fail to endure, and I've never seen the point.

I'm sure you'll make the right decision without any guilt attached. Just tell the school the truth, there's nothing they can do about it, and wanting him pushed beyond his limits is wrong.

Teachers eh? What can you do about them!

[Suze]

SHOCKED!......................your lad is doing extremely well coping with all that.........the idea of a production would have sent my boy into a mega panic...............there is nothing to gain for your son going in on the last day, and everything for you both to gain by him staying home and chillin.

 

...............hope the week goes o.k. for you..........and if things start to unravel before thurs and he can,t cope I,d be inclined to say he,s sick and keep him off, best wishes suzex.

[Karen A]

Hi Lisa....allow me a cynical momment The firm line on Thurs is probably for the same reason as the 1:30 finish before school holidays at DSs school..LEA attendance put pressure on HT to maintain attendance figures.....allowing a day off on Thurs would affect the figures so the rules are adapted to fit...As I said.. before holidays my DSs school bring the children in from luch play...register them and then expect parents to collect them promptly...just so that the figures for the afternoon attendance are ok.If a child was collected at 1 that would be classed as unauthoried abscence for the afternoon....but the HT writes a clear note on the board that parents need to be at school promptly at 1330 to collect their children

[cmuir]

Hi

 

Dare I say this, but does he have to be there? I went through something similar two years ago over school nativity play. I wrote HT and teachers a letter stating that I genuinely wasn't convinced he could cope with participating and that I didn't want my son being the centre of attention for all the wrong reasons - it simply wasn't fair on him. I didn't give them the choice. R did participate in the rehearsals but I kept him off school on that day. Last year it was a different story - I felt that R had made good progress and he was given a big part in the play. He was amazing and I was so proud.

 

Guess what I'm saying is that you're J's mum and you know him best!

 

Best wishes

 

Caroline