Jannih Report post Posted July 18, 2008 Hi everyone I am new to this site and not absolutely sure if I should be either ! I am a 54yr old woman and have grown up with a younger sister who is an undiagnosed person with autism. It has only been in the last week that I have begun to see and understand her condition through looking up the subject on the internet. However the main reason for me being here is that all my life I have seen the same traits in me that are in my sister though not as severe. This has always troubled me somewhat , as besides my sister there are others on the autisic spectrum in the extended family. As a child I had no friends at school and to compensate I would skip aimlessy around the playground in my own little world. As a teenager I would run everywhre, not walk. I was constantly bullied and regarded as a bit odd. I was always picked last for team games as I was clumsy . I am face blind. I pick constantly at my fingers and feet until they are red, raw and sometimes bleeding . This is not because I am self harming in the traditional sense but because skin might be flaking off and I have to make it smooth again . If it's a spot on my face I have to pick that as well. I had no idea until last week that this comes under the umbrella of OCD. The only positives , I think are hyperlexia. Once I saw a word in writing I could spell it, no matter how difficult. Getting back to the main reason for my posting. All my life I have had difficulties with most of my personal relationships. I am single and although I could attract a guy I could not hold on to them as could not relate on a social level and they naturally wanted to get into the physical side before I was ready. I have a few friends that have been loyal over the years but they can talk for England and thus compensate for my lack of conversation. I am unable to initiate and maintain conversation unless its for a specific reason. I am seen as aloof by work colleagues. I can talk if it's a couple of sentences but if you ask me to tell you what the storyline of a favourite programme was, I will get hopelessly tongue tied and not make much sense. I might have to describe an incident at work to my supervisor and she sometimes hasn't got a clue what I'm talking about ! Although it is more understandable if I record it on the computer. I also appear to have an auditory processing problem. I am not deaf but a colleague will say something and I will not hear it. I have said that they should say my name first then I will probably hear them. At work I am extremely unhappy and depressed because of this "social phobia". My colleagues have not made things easy for me but they just see me as unfriendly and perhaps not a good team player, though I do try. I am marginalised by them. I would so much love to feel I belong but I know it's not them it is me because I have these problems wherever I go. I suppose I am lucky to be able to hold a job down , though I feel I only just manage . Throughout my life I have just felt that I am barely surviving in this world but have been unable to share this with anyone. Before I go off sick with depression again I would like to find out if I do have a high functioning ASD then at least I can say to my colleagues " I have this condition please be patient with me." Firstly, from what I have said , do you think I have ASD and what is the likelihood of getting a diagnosis and help at my time of life. Jannih Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pearl Report post Posted July 18, 2008 Welcome to the forum Jannih. I think you are in the right place! Lots of adults on here who were diagnosed as adults, so I'm sure some will be along with advice for you. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
single autie mum Report post Posted July 18, 2008 welcome jannih it must have been very tough for you growing up not knowing why you acted differently to everyone else my heart goes out to you <'> <'> <'> i have son with asd been diagnosed 7 years and even now members of close family have trouble understanding his social problems push gp to refer you for assesment and get diagnosis and i would try to get job thats less stressful fo you if possible public dont understand conditions they cannot see is there any support groups in your area? stay with this forum its great for support my best wishes go out to you ope thing get better for you soon Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Karen A Report post Posted July 18, 2008 Hi jannih Welcome to the Forum. Karen. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jannih Report post Posted July 18, 2008 (edited) Thank you everyone for such a lovely welcome. I have been in touch with the NAS and they have provided me with the details of a few diagnosticians in the field of autism. What has surprised is the lack of NHS resources for adults , everything is geared towards children. I might try and get a referral to the Bethlem & Maudsley - thats if its not too long a wait. Otherwise I might make enquiries to Cash4Health which is similar to HSA and go private if they cover me for something like this. Can anybody tell me if it's easy getting a referral or is that a silly question ??!! Jannih Edited July 18, 2008 by Jannih Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
loobylou2 Report post Posted July 18, 2008 <'> hi and welcome to the forum. Can't help with adult dx I'm afraid but there are several peeps on here who can Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Flora Report post Posted July 18, 2008 Hi Jannih Welcome to the forum. Flora Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ASue67 Report post Posted July 18, 2008 Hello <'> Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tally Report post Posted July 18, 2008 Hi Jannih, and welcome to the forum. It's impossible to diagnose over the internet, but it does sound like it would be worth investigating Asperger's further. I was diagnosed with Asperger's last year, aged 25. It was not possible to get assessed on the NHS and in the end I went private. It certainly would not be a quick process. If you have a history of depression, it will be very easy for them to blame all your difficulties on low self esteem or social anxiety. It does not help that you may well have developed these conditions as a result of your genuine social difficulties. The problem is that mental health professionals are trained to look for psychological causes for everything, rather than considering the possibility of a neurological condition like autism. For now it might help to learn more about AS so that you can present a good argument to your GP about why you should be assessed. Tony Attwood's Complete Guide to Asperger Syndrome is very thorough. Another good book is Asperger Syndrome and Long Term Relationships. Apart from the obvious, it also talks about how AS can present in adults who have learned to compensate for their difficulties. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kathryn Report post Posted July 18, 2008 Hi Jannih Welcome to the forum. If you browse some of the topics in the Beyond Adolescence section, you'll see that there are others who have sought a diagnosis in "later life". Good luck with your own quest. K x Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fallgyrl Report post Posted July 18, 2008 Hi and welcome. Hope you find some answers here Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jannih Report post Posted July 19, 2008 Thanks for the book recommendations. I have ordered The Complete Guide To Asperger's Syndrome and also Aspergers & Girls ,both by Tony Attwood , from the local library. Jannih Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NickyB Report post Posted July 19, 2008 Hello and welcome, jannih Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sarah Perry Report post Posted July 19, 2008 Hello and Welcome! So pleased you have found us Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Clare63 Report post Posted July 20, 2008 Hi Jannih, Welcome so glad you found us ~ Clare Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
