smileyK Report post Posted June 26, 2012 Told best friend secret now feel bad guilty as texting her asking if told anyone as no one must know anything about it " top secret" can't explain give anymore details than that! Weren't suppose tell anyone else promised close family I'm scared afraid worried I've offended my best friend now! She text me saying " no of course I haven't I wouldn't do that you know that" trying work out in my head if she angry upset with me for even having ask that question if first place just get so paranoid anxious as not my secret to tell I text her tonight saying sorry if I have uPset her and that I'm so sorry that I'm idiot and didn't mean too! Really scared Ive lost her for good! Then won't be able go away Saturday relaxed chilled for my holiday I'll be worked stressed! Gr! I also asked if I have upset her? ! Really hope I havent! She understands my AS well just paranoia anxiety get better of me sometimes ! Try explaining to her! Maybe thinking too much putting too into situation hope I'm just proved wrong about whole situation like before eating away at me! All can think of Is my best friend! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
A-S warrior Report post Posted June 26, 2012 " no of course I haven't I wouldn't do that you know that" nope shes not angry, she told you this for reassurance. tone of voice is very hard to dictate via text, i should know, ive landed myself in hot water more than once. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
smileyK Report post Posted June 27, 2012 Paranoia anxiety depression off the scale measure wise out of control feel like let everyone down everyone my best friend hates me and close family which I informed other night of that let " secret" out slip to my best friend paranoia is going round and round spinning can't sleep tossing and turning hope best friend text me back in the morning telling me I haven't upset her in any way! My paranoia telling me no one safe to trust with secret this totally freaks me scares me out wish never told her now then wouldn't cause me panic freak so much told close family they said just don't tell anyone else let anyone else know isn't a " bad secret" why my thought head playing tricks on me?! Because I'm letting it in?! How do put breaks on it before goes any further? Paranoia seems feed on anxiety/ stress/ depression reaches breaking point! All just as bad right now no escaping any of it I'm trapped feel like dragging everyone best friend as always in my MH mess confusion! Should I wait see if best friend texts me? Paranoia makes me chase reassurance all time !!! Hate myself even asking her as makes me look like I don't trust her! I put that I hope she can forgive me?! I don't trust myself anything about myself not about her! Why do I open big mouth! But tell best friend " everything" hope MH don't wreck friendship might be too late for that?! Hoping not! Fingers crossed! Making it sound like don't trust anything about our friendship that is wrong maybe I do t deserve her at all! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
A-S warrior Report post Posted June 27, 2012 true friends will always forgive you no matter what, she diddnt text back becuse, she was either tired, diddnt feel like talking, or thought you were being a bit silly, and she diddnt know what to say. if she doesnt text in the morning, dont worry. just at some point of the day change the subject and talk about your holiday or something. say something like, would you like a present brought back? or something like, should we go out for a drink and a chat before i go away? really if shes a true friend, it will take alot more than that to get rid of her. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
smileyK Report post Posted June 27, 2012 I now feel silly stupid myself!!! I go OTT suffocating don't mean to! Now scared ring her have already text her start of week asking her if wants present brought back never text back but you're right did text late last night she works shifts or sometimes doesn't text me back as I'm being stupid or silly!! Has happened before hopefully get sorted before go away on Saturday?! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
robert7111a Report post Posted June 27, 2012 SmileyK If she's a true friend and she understands you (as you say), then you have nothing to worry about. Don't go tying yourself up in knots about it and reminding her of the issue Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
A-S warrior Report post Posted June 27, 2012 i dont even text back my own mother sometimes, why? because i cant be bothered. how many times have you got a text come through and you think, mmmmmmmm, maybe later. espeshilly if your filling up her inbox? i would make no attempt to contact her until after you come back from holiday, unless she texts you. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
matzoball Report post Posted June 27, 2012 calm. down. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
smileyK Report post Posted June 27, 2012 Friend text me walking to work stay she was asleep last night when text her she text me when walking to work "stop panicking I'm at work silly and then im asleep when you text me you haven't upset me in anyway it fine x" she asked me if still needed her to go doctors with me? I said scared go alone need support! She meeting me at the doctors! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
smileyK Report post Posted June 27, 2012 I feel frantic manic with up and down see saw affect of depression,anxiety & panic sends me wild crazy feel mad going feel embarrassed in front of best friend tomorrow Ashamed Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
robert7111a Report post Posted June 28, 2012 Give/ask for a hug and it'll be ok. Your best friend will understand Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
trekster Report post Posted June 28, 2012 "Anxiety and depression workbook for dummies" (i use this the term 'dummies' = simple english) "The asperger personal guide", "the asperger social guide" and "the asperger love guide" (excellent series of books) The sensory book mentioned in the SPD/OCD thread. Also ask NAS for their lists of counsellers, you have to pay privately but it is worth it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
smileyK Report post Posted June 28, 2012 How much would cost for NAS counsellor??? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
smileyK Report post Posted June 28, 2012 I read aspergers love guide will ask library for others you've listed!!! thanks for suggestions!!! Grateful! X Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
trekster Report post Posted June 28, 2012 Anytime Smileyk, re ASD counsellers it would depend on the person, but they can do telephone counselling. i sent out a group email to a few that helped in the areas i needed the most help with. Ask the NAS for their list of counsellers, there is no obligation to accept any of them. i picked mine because she kept me calm enough to pass my driving test that day. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
smileyK Report post Posted June 28, 2012 I feel as if I have long list of outstanding "issues" mainly MH not expecting tablets alone shift it! Need some outside input too! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
