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Eleinay

Emotional black out

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Hello,

I need some help. Something quite strange happens to me or, at least I think it's strange.

When for some reason I get hurt by someone who is very emotionally close to me, I react and I get angry, but then everything stops: for days I get a total emotional black out. I do all what I have to, I go to work, I study, I efficiently organize my days. Who hurted me simply ceases to exist, even if she/he says that he/she is sorry, cries and so on. I do not feel anything. I can't even remember what is like to love him/her.

Is that normal for an aspie?

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I'd say yes that I am like you. It doesn't even have to be love with me its simply someone not doing something the way I want it done that gets to me so I cope with just blocking it all out. Sometimes this works other times it doesn't and the problem remains and I have to find a way of dealing with it, which I'm not good at

I tend to have this problem a lot with people in authority

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It's a way to block out emotional problems that you don't understand or have any control over. I am similar to you not identical but blocking things out when they become too much is a good survival strategy otherwise we would be in a continuous meltdown in these situations.

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Sounds like dissociation to me where you take yourself out of the situation to stop yourself being hurt.

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I'm similar, I don't understand why a situation has happened. Tonight has been an example, not triggered by me, but someone else, they stormed off threatening to leave me and calling me a weirdo. I don't feel hurt about that but just want to speak to them, but they have closed me out. Makes me very sad.

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Thanks everyone for your time.

 

I agree with Trekster, it sounds like dissociation.

 

I experienced last "episode" in July, when I opened this thread. Everything went better in a week or so, not a long time but not too short too.

 

I think that my auto-diagnosed Asperger has a lot to do with that: when I have a special-one I struggle to see things for what they simply are and so, when everything is fine I feel I can trust this person (totally) and when there is a problem (I feel hurt) then I feel that the whole

 

relationship is a mess and I can't totally trust this person anymore. You know... it's just like an on-off switch. I don't know if my english is sufficient to explain these kind of sensations.

 

The person who choose to live with me has to be very patient but most of all she has to be very CAREFUL. What she says, what she does, could have very painful effects on me. Effects that can ultimately (and not so rarely) lead to an emotional blackout. I know and I understand that the things that hurt me the most are not even annoying for other people, so I think that it must be hard to "learn" such a strange behavioral pattern...

 

So I agree with Ajl, it's just someone not doing things the way "I want", even uf this kind of expression has to be understood in an aspie way.

 

Louie, please, could you explain what happened to you and how you reacted?

 

Thanks again to everyone.

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I find my problems are because I can't read what's happening or why something is happening. So in many cases, I can fuel a situation by trying to explain why I done something and why the way I've done it is the right way etc etc. I'm starting to understand that people don't care about that - they are only bothered about how it affects them or what has happened not why. The recent case was me trying to help, but really because the action the other person would take wasn't the right action (as far as I was concerned) it perhaps comes across as a bit controlling, perhaps it is, but it's guiding an outcome down a route that makes me comfortable. I'm not sure this explains it well, but I have a comfort zone and somethings are outside that and those cause me more stress. I also get stressed with too much going on. That can be noise or thoughts. On the noise front, higher pitched noises are the worst. Thoughts, nobody knows what I'm thinking about - that's the problem, I can be happily considering "things" in my head and something else becomes too much so gets dismissed. My wife recognises that but doesn't always accept that. It's hard sometimes.....and I wish I had answer or or could make it easier.....but I don't think I can.

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If you can find ways of reducing the level of overloading situations that can minimise the chances of an emotional blackout from occurring.

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Hello when everything is too much I have a sleep. I aso do colouring or something that doesn't involve thinking.listening to music doesn't work with me. Also I pray and crying really helps me. I hope that helps you.

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