sweet little girl

[kaycollins95]

Just wondering wether there are other children out there like my 6 year old chelsie . She was diagnosed with aspergers 18 months ago. Gets no support at school as she is highly intelligent and nobody seems to think she needs any help as they are happy to let her plod through her days. The thing is she is a golden little girl . Doesnt sleep well but is happy to sit in her room all night reading. The biggest problem we seem to have is the fact that she constantly wants to be alone. She doesnt like company at all which breaks my heart. I always feel like a bad parent because she asks nothing of me . I thing sometimes it would be easier if she where more challenging as then at least i would know i was needed. Pretty selfish huh?!

I just read other posts and think ive got it so easy and yet i still complain . We have problems with getting her to go out anywhere but as long as we are at home she is totaly happy. I wonder if anybody elses children are like Chelsie?

I get the 'she doesnt look like shes got autism' al lot and tend to reply 'we had the horns removed from her head so it isent so obvious' which i know is terrible but i think it is such a stupid and iggnorant comment.

Edited September 13, 2005 by kaycollins95

[annie]

Hi Kay,

 

I don't know if you have seen this post on the forum. It may or may not be helpful, but might be worth a look.

 

http://www.asd-forum.org.uk/forum/index.ph...st=0entry1444

 

Ah, the comments - loved your reply

 

Annie

XX

[phasmid]

I could insert Phas Jr for every time you say Chelsie! Sounds just like him. I had to laugh at your daughters de-horning...we say exactly the same thing at times . I mean can ANYONE tell me what an Autistic child is supposed to look like?

 

Just after he was diagnosed a neighbour knocked and asked "Is he safe out there with the other children?" meaning were they safe with him! To which I responded "Fine, except if it is a full moon and the day of the week ends with anything except a 'Y'. We took his axe away from him as it was a bit too sharp!" Well I would have said it if Mrs Phasmid had let me. What we DID do was to explain to her about Aspergers...she went away re-educated and (I hope) a bit ashamed of the ###### stupid question.

 

We also got what I call the 'F off' and mind your own business cards from the NAS (They actually say 'This young person has Aspergers...) after 1 incident in a shop when we had a meltdown I had to deal with by holding him against a fridge cabinet to to stop him lashing out. 1 woman happened to pass comment about that 'horrible man having a go at that poor child like that' - she got it both barrels from Mrs Phasmid. We were a bit tender at that time!

 

He hates going out shopping, so we try not to take him unless we have to (he's 15). He also spends hours in his room reading or watching TV/DVDs...hell he's happy and not doing any harm.

[bid]

This sounds like my 4 year old!

 

I went into Nursery with him yesterday, and my big fear now is that the CDC assessment will think he's fine!

 

He was soooo quiet and good you wouldn't believe it! Even when the children had to wait for ages for school photos, he sat crossed-legged, completely still...unlike all the other little boys who wriggled and fidgeted!!

 

I could see things in his interaction with the other children, but it's very subtle, and of course he never causes a moments problem for the staff.

 

Plus, he is always smiling...(that's what everyone always says about him!)

 

Bid

[kaycollins95]

Glad to know im not on my own. Im always being told how lovely and polite chelsie is and i have to agree.So why do i always feel like a bad mom. I feel she is copying the other children at school not being herself. The head of spec needs actually commented to me that i worry to much , she said 'chelsies got autism so what my sons got hayfever' I wont tell you what my reply was!

Shes been on the pc tonight for 5 hours solid. do i leave her why shes happy or do i make her come off, wish someone would write a guide book for me!

[nightingales]

Hi Kay,

My kids aren't very like your little girl, but she does remind me of myself at her age. Substitue books for computers and you couldn't tell the difference. One astute teacher commented on my school report (aged about 6) that 'My only concern is her utter lack of social contact'. My parents robustly refused to believe that this could be a problem. Amongst four children, they felt one quiet one just had to be a good thing.

 

In fact, my mother (bless her) still puts it down to eyesight: 'You never talked to anyone because you couldn't see them', followed by 'When you got glasses, you were too self-conscious about them to talk to anyone' (?!) and ''You preferred books to people because you could see them better.'

 

It was only after ds's diagnosis that I began to question their version of my childhood...

Your little girl sounds lovely, though -- bet I wasn't that sweet!

Lins

[KarenM]

My dd didn,t have behavioural problems till she hit puberty, so enjoy this time because it might not last. I NEARLY DIED THE FIRST TIME SHE CALLED ME A SH**t head . But now i get called a f***ing bi*** daily and hit. I don't mean to scare you this is just my own experiance i hope it doesn;t happen to you.

[Kathryn]

My daughter also spent a lot of time reading at the same age and as her parents are somewhat bookish and not inclined to much physical activity I think we were guilty of feeding this habit!

 

Although we were many years off a dx, looking back I can see that she liked routines and she had her obsessions (horses, horses and horses) so any outings tended to be to the same places to find- yes- horses, which meant hundreds of visits to farms and shire horse centres. (yawn ) Not much different though to many other little girls of 5 or 6 - no wonder it took us so long to get a dx!.

[DaisyProudfoot]

My dd didn,t have behavioural problems till she hit puberty, so enjoy this time because it might not last. I NEARLY DIED THE FIRST TIME SHE CALLED ME A SH**t head . But now i get called a f***ing bi*** daily and hit. I don't mean to scare you this is just my own experiance i hope it doesn;t happen to you.

" But now i get called a f***ing bi*** daily"

 

Oh yes, I am very familiar with that phrase - my AS son's 9, sadly he is very aggressive and not like Chelsie but if he's left to play on the computer he bothers no one at all - just gets lost in his own little world for hours on end - and we get peace.

 

His Aspie friend at school is very quiet so it's a good job my lad isn't as his friend just lies on the ground and takes it when he's being bullied - my boy steps in and uses the fists to protect him while his friend provides a calming effect when my boy gets over-emotional.

 

Daisy

[tsmom]

You could be talking about Toria,she will sit for hours alone in her room.Shes bright ,calm (most of the time)and when shes dancing, acting,reading you would never dream there is a problem.Away from the safty of her room or the comfort of her obsesion(dance) she becomes nervous, during change she gets very jumpey or if pushed to far she screams crys refuses to comply.She has a food diary made by her telling me what to cook each day,just see the look on her face if i substitute something.we are just round the corner for pubity so im batening down the hatches.