help

[board]

hello i was wondering if you could help me my daughter is 6 we are in the middle of seeing if she is aspergers the hospital think she is but long way to go but yesterday she came home from school like she was hige all over the place i had to clam her down i told her to sit on the floor untill she felt better after this she was shouting and nasty if she was older i would have thought she had taken something do you know what i mean do they go like this please advise me thank you jill

[DAS999]

Hi, my girlfriend (mid 20's AS) gets like that sometimes. It is the start of one of her "meltdowns" she is angry, abusive, hits out or hits herself. This can go on for 30 mins or more then she just clams up totally. will not talk or communicate and this can last for 48 hours.

I do not have too much knowledge on AS/ASD but I have been told that all people with AS/ASD cope differently and display different behaviours. Maybe this is your daughters form of "meltdown".

If you are under a hospital waiting assessment do what I was told to do and keep a diary of events like this and see if you can see a pattern or trigger point to them.

I hope someone who knows more than me will be able to help you more.

Keep your chin up she is still your special little girl <'>

[anxiousmom]

I'm no expert but this sounds all so familiar!

 

My son has just had an AS diagnosis and too is 6. But we get episodes like this from his younger sister too!

 

Each one seems to get it's own explanation from us - over tired, eaten too much sugar/e numbers, coming down with a cold etc etc the excuses go on.

 

One thing I've found with my son after school is that he does act out of charactor (though it's so often now I just think it's him changing! ) and I'm convinced that it's stresses from school that he's releasing on coming home. He went through a patch of soiling his pants everyday. He would come home from school and I'd check them, ask him if he needed to go, he'd say no, go to his room and poo his pants! Like HUH? We never really got to the bottom (pardon the pun) of why he did this as we managed to get him out of it with routine and some mommy loving... but my EP freind said it was probably that he's so stressed at trying to 'cope' at school (constant rejection, not fitting in etc) that he just released all this when he got home and was 'safe'.

 

Could this be it for you? Maybebe she had a really bad day and just got home where she felt secure and lashed out at the ones she loves?

 

Maybe... maybe I'm barking up the wrong tree... or maybe I'm just plain barking!!

[lindy-lou]

The same happens here too,my 3 year old (ASD/AS) is really difficult to deal with when she comes home from nursery(where she is a little angel) and my sister has an awful time after school with her son 13(AS) i think its down to being home and being able to let out all the frustrations of the day where theyve had to try and contain there behaviour,and also the change of enviroments from school to home,its difficult,wearing,stressing and tiring to go through day after day and the holidays are really looked forward to!!for both children and parents

[loulou]

Hi,

 

I would like to add, that i have the same trouble with my son, Kai. He is 7 and has ADHD/ASD.

 

When he gets in from school he is like a caged animal let loose. He runs, jumps, crashes into things, shouts, screams and is generally HYPER. He can also be quite rude to me. Once he calms down, he is fine.

 

I DEFINATELY think it's caused by two things;

 

1) Trying to be good at school all day then "letting it all out" once home.

 

2) Transition from school to home.

 

One of the teachers suggested going to the park or for a walk on the way home, so he can let off steam. I have tried it a few times (and froze my socks off doing so!) and it seems to help a bit. Maybe worth a try.

 

I have also found it helps if i totally ignore his crazy behaviour. I have realised that he needs to do this before he settles down. If i try to stop him running about, he just gets cross and things then escalate and i end up getting cross too .

 

Loulou x

[phasmid]

1) Trying to be good at school all day then "letting it all out" once home.

 

That's it in a nutshell. Children with ASDs often spend their whole day trying to 'fit in'. This can be a very stressful process for them. When they get home they are like a coiled spring that has been slowly tightened throughout the day. Home is a safe place to let that tension out - cue meltdown. It is often par for the course I'm afraid. Phas Jr is 16, we still get days like this - though they are not a regular occurrence and nor are they as bad as they used to be.

 

If there is a particular 'something' that is causing angst at school you may be able to help take some of the tension out by getting it addressed. Easier said then sone, I know. But worth a try if you can persuade them to tell you.

 

HTH

[neda]

My wee fella is same after coming home from nursery and has been worse this week. The nursery asked to change his class so he could get 1-1 support from additional needs teacher, I agreed to this as trial. Although he now seems to be having only good days in nursery, I'm getting the brunt of it when he is picked up. The only thing which helps him settle is to have a sleep which has messed up his 'routine' at home. No way round it though, if I don't let him have a sleep his sisters and me get lashed out at, he was so bad the other night he hit his 6 year old sister in the face with a hard plastic action man robot. I think that it could be he isn't expending the energy he did in other classroom where he ran about like a maniac all afternoon, because of 1-1 he is concentrating more through afternoon, so he is knackered by the time he is finished, but still has pent up energy.