'I'm Hungry'

[jlp]

Ds#1 (6 with AS) is driving me mad foodwise and I'm not sure how I should be dealing with it.

 

In recent months he's dropped so much from what he would eat, I don't know what to feed him any more. It's really so limited.

 

There also seems to be constant variation on what he will eat - he'll eat a ham sandwich (on the 'will eat' list) one day but not another.

 

I tend to give him something that he would usually eat and try really really hard (!) to be indifferent to whether he eats it or not. Chances are he won't or will have 3 bites.

 

This is all fine but then he's constantly saying he's hungry - that's fine too but (I've tried both offering him a choice of something or giving him something without asking what he wants)then I have a tantrum.

 

Basically he wants cr*p and while I have no problem with him having some 'junk' food, I don't want him to have it all the time or junk will form the majority of his diet as he doesn't eat his meals. I try to offer basically healthy things as snacks when he says he's hungry - fruit, bread, breadsticks, cracker biscuits, raw carrots but he's going off all of those now and refusing them and he's having such a tantrum as he wants something 'nice' but doesn't know what.

 

We've spoken to the C&F unit and they've said I will have to try and give him what he will eat and not get too hung up on healthy things - but while I'm not really, really healthy I don't want him to exist purely on crisps, sweets and the occasional sugary cereal which is what he'd eat if given free rein.

 

Also worried about the effect on ds#2 who's 2 1/2 (nt) but so far a good little eater but he's going to notice that he gets proper food and big brother gets processed cr*p and crisps.

Edited July 1, 2006 by jlp

[Bagpuss]

Pretty much the same in our household. Our youngest dd has survived on a diet of marmite toast and fresh orange for breakfast, marmite sandwich crisps yoghurt for lunch and chicken nuggets/sausages with either smiley faces or waffles for tea for years. No attempt at getting her to try new foods has succeeded. We've tried disguising it, hiding it, offering rewards, refusing to let her leave table till she tries something new, only offering her to eat same meals as us, trying to offer healthier alternatives (ie made our own chicken nuggets) all failed. Spoke to paed, who advised us to feed her what she was happy with eating, as getting food into her was the most important factor. Totally chilled out about it all now, infact feel slightly guilty for putting her thru so much (alot of these things we tried before dx and had no knowledge of sensory sensitivities). Our home is stressful enough, without adding meal times to the list. Our other two children are older, so they do understand, and they wouldn't even want to eat a diet of chicken nuggets everyday. I can understand that it would be tougher for yourself if you have a younger child. I try and take the view now that she'll try new foods as and when she's ready. Sorry I couldn't be of more help and hope some other forum member can offer some sound advice as all I can do is share our experience. Take care and good luck with it.

[KarenT]

Hi Chuck

 

Ah, feeding time - that old chestnut!

 

I've found with J that he has a limited number of 'allowed' foods on his mental list at a given time, so if I persuade him to try something new and he'll have it regularly then something has to drop off the list to make way for it. I have to be very careful about how I rotate his food preferences so that he doesn't 'forget' that he likes something, otherwise I have to start from scratch all over again teaching him how to enjoy it.

 

He's gone off carrots lately, the first vegetable he ate (apart from when he was weaned as a baby - I'm talking of the four years in the fruit and veg wilderness when I cooked the same tea for four years) and his usual first choiced of veg, and he'll refuse to eat them when I serve them now. In order to keep non-favourites on the list I'll tell him he doesn't have to eat it all (which can be a bit threatening) but make a mini-pile at the side of the plate of one stick of carrot, one green bean, one piece of potato or whatever, and say if he eats just those he'll get a small reward (Green and Black's ice cream is the incentive of choice these days). Even if he just has a bite I'm happy because it stays in the repertoire. Sometimes I've offered the same food raw (if I know he'll accept it that way) and that can help.

 

Using obsessions works for me too. During the Harry Potter phase I could encourage all sorts into him by referring to the sweets etc in the books. I'd say to dh, "Mmm, these pumpkin pasties are great, aren't they Ron" and he'd say "Great, Hermione, the house elves have excelled themselves" etc and J would join in the game. Of course that would only work with existing accepted foods, I could never get him to eat anything new that way. Star Wars is fab too (I know G is big on that just now) - have told J that Jedi never know which planet they're going to end up on so they have to be prepared to eat whatever they find. How else could Yoda have survived his exile on Dagobar? And so on...

 

Have you tried explaining about nutrition to G? J's far more interested when he knows the reason why, and it's far easier to get him on board. Worth a shot?

 

Keep your chin up - he's a big healthy lad and he's not suffering for it, but I do know what you mean about not wanting to keep him on such a lousy diet. Tackle it in small chunks, when you've got the energy to devote to it, because consistency is key in this, I think.

 

Talk soon

Karen

x

[mrs phasmid]

thought id bump this to see if anyone else can help

[jlp]

Hi

I hope you got your pm, I'm quite new to pm-ing and not sure if I did it right.

Thank you

[phasmid]

Hi jlp, Mrs P got the pm ok. She has put some recipes on up on the 'off topic' forum.

[mel]

ooh recipes - goody

 

all i can get ds to eat at the moment is those horrid micro fries in a box (no names mentioned) and yoghurt.

 

sigh - the battle goes on....and on and on....

[jlp]

ooh recipes - goody

 

all i can get ds to eat at the moment is those horrid micro fries in a box (no names mentioned) and yoghurt.

 

sigh - the battle goes on....and on and on....

 

Ah those blooming microchips at least they're on offer 2 boxes for ?2!

 

They seem to be one of the few things ds will accept

[BusyLizzie100]

This topic has really cheered me up! We had a huge fight over tea tonight because I just refused to open another tin of Ravioli or throw chicken nuggets in the oven again and ACTUALLY COOKED SOME PROPER FOOD! It's still sitting on the dining table.

 

Needless to say, the kids are starving now and I'm at my wits end about what to give them. Fruit, veg etc are OUT; it's just bread, biscuits and ######.

 

DS3 has always been my best eater but even he now is refusing proper food, although that could be more to do with his age. The other two just seem to be limiting their diet so much that I expect one day there'll only be one single food they'll eat.

 

So thanks, guys, because lots of what's been said is true and it is most important that they eat. Ah well, chicken nuggets again for tea tomorrow...

[dooday24]

REECE USUALLY EATS 2 BOWLS OF CEREAL ADAY

[barefoot wend]

One of my children is a very fussy eater (definitely not asd but I think he must have been given the 'faddy eating' gene part that his brother didn't take up from the gene pool). I seem to spend most of my days going to various shops to get the very particular foods that he will currently eat but go off at any time.

 

I try very hard to find a variety of foods but it is hard as he'll only eat a particular type of bread from a particular shop, only Canadian cheddar, only Braeburn apples, only a particular brand of chip, a particular brand of orange juice, a particular packet of crisps, only strawberry frubes, even only a particular brand of bottled water - yes, we've done a taste test and he can tell the difference!

 

As I say I spend a good deal of time getting particular brands from different retailers as, of course, no one shop sells all the particular brands he'll eat.

 

AAAaaarrrrggghhhh!

 

The only good news is that I can get him to have a multi-vitamin supplement and Eye Q capsule. Hurrah!

[caren]

Hi

 

K(6) who's AS has eaten the same food since he was 1 , toast for breakfast , jam butty for dinner (but its got be a certain jam) , with jaffa cakes and scooby doo yoghets then same for tea specilist said to try some thing new and for everytime he trys to give a reward , he still does'nt try stuff i suppose he will when he's ready , oh and K is a big lad

 

now L (14) aspergers wow every meal is a battle L is very underweight and we do try if you eat this you can pick tomorrows tea

 

K(9) no dx won't stop eating he eats everything till he's sick

[bramblebrae]

My S went from eating everything to being very picky at about age 2.5 i think. I spent couple of years trying and being told stuff like he'll eat after 4 days I'm sure by the dopey Health visitor this was 10 mins after she tested him at age 4 with a new ASD check list they had been given for 2 yr olds and said he did fine there this was like one week after a clinical psych finally diagnosed him after observing him over a year in various situations (oh side stepped into HV rant lol)

Anyway we have gone through a few foods the old ones being chucked aside as the new ones come in.

It went from character pasta shapes with no sauce to the sausages in character pasta shapes with no sauce but no pasta either to the point where once he did actually eat both with sauce cause we were at a relatives who didn't know and served him like that ..I was absolutely gobsmacked but after this he refused it entirely....then for a couple o months it was porridge then we went to kfc for the first time and chicken pops only from kfc or porridge then at last i found a store bought chicken pop that was acceptable and this has now lasted for ages dinner is porridge at grannies or chicken pops at home..nothing else can be on the plate or it becomes a projectile aimed at me also double chicken pops that have stuck together are rejected along with any he feels are disformed in any way. For lunch at school last year when he eventually got support so he was safe to stay for lunch I eventually got these cheese dippers with bacon bits he loved but grrh they've stopped making them so he takes the plain cheese dippers but only eat the bread sticks and one dip of cheese if lucky. He won't eat chips won't eat a sandwich only dry bread or pancake...it really can drive you mad but I suppose I've kinda given up I do worry what will happen if the foods I get just now change or the manufacturer stops selling them. He would just live on pringles if I let him even with these others foods his one saving grace is he will have fresh orange juice and raisins or yogurt covered fruit flakes (strawberry only- I buy them 20 packs at a time cause the shop is sold out often-they'll probably disappear soon too) School think he will eat with the rest of the children so persuaded me to send him to dinners twice a week ...he eats 2 crackers a tiny pack of raisins and milk and orange juice ..comes out and raids my mums sweetie basket. Arguments ensue over said basket..

He too is a normal weight etc and growing ok so basically health profs will not listen ... if I could get him to eat one vegetable I really would be fine with it. His favoruite colour is green,he's quite obsessed by it he wants everything to be green-he was moaning at me cause I have green eyes and his are blue and it wasn't fair cause he should have green lol but he just won't touch the greens food wise.

 

I have been told by a couple o folk whose AS/ASD kids were the same with food that they started to 'grow' out of it in their teens ..so I live in hope but I've got a wee while to wait he'll be 7 next month.

 

Lorraine

[Stephanie]

Yeah I can totally relate.

 

My sons diet is very limited, he goes off foods and never eats them again. He doesn't like eating the same thing today as he had yesterday. He is totally against trying anything new. He just used to eat sweet things.

 

Sometimes he has cereal for breakfast, very seldom toast. Usually a yoghurt and 3 jaffa cakes.

 

Lunch is jam sandwiches - and 4 other items in his lunchbox - only 5 things allowed. Drink, yoghurt, mini cheese, some kind of biscuit usually.

 

Dinner is 5 Tuc crackers with dairylea, or sometimes he will have breadsticks, followed by a yoghurt and some grapes or strawberries, a biscuit or cake. There are a few other things he will have on seldom occasions.

 

He loves McD happy meals, the nuggets are the only meat he eats .. once every 2 weeks.

 

He used to eat a lot more junk .. but due to Healthy Eating Week at school, he has cut back on the sweets, cakes, crisps etc. Also, his teeth are very sensitive so that prevents him from eating sugary foods. When he was 3 all he would eat was sweet things, nothing savoury at all.

 

I just had him referred to dietetics - he was getting all the nutrition he needs, even though his diet is very dairy and carb based. They even told me to take him off his multivitamins.

 

We have tried various things, eating together, not talking about food, sticker charts, praise, smelling and touching the food etc etc ... some of it has worked but the results were only temporary.

 

He has an inate fear of trying something new ... and will say "I don't like that" without having tried it.

 

He didn't eat ice cream or ice lollies until he was 4 - I was so pleased when he started. Even if he just has a taste of something different, we see it as such a great step forward.

 

It's slow going, but the more we relax about it, the better he seems to be.

 

Went to a family BBQ on Saturday and his Great Aunty was trying to force smoked salmon and melon down him (I was sitting in the corner rolling my eyes and thinking "good luck lady!") Ha ha. Who gives smoked salmon to a 5 year old anyway?

 

Hopefully they will get better as they get older. Fingers crossed for you.

[keyholekate]

Two dry weetabix at a time. Never been troubled by constipation. Mmmmmm I wonder!

[barefoot wend]

Have to admit that some of my most vivid childhood memories are about meals out.

 

I would only eat plain roasted chicken (god forbid if anyone tried to put sauce on it - I screamed the Chinese restaurant down when they did). I also only ate plain pasta with no meat or sauce, and plain boiled rice, and AUSTRALIAN cheddar. I did drink tons of milk.

 

I also remember having a big celebratory meal in the restaurant at London Zoo and refusing to eat anythong but tapioca!

 

'What goes around, comes around.'

 

Barefoot

 

P.S. I now eat virtually everything. Except lychees (ugh!).

[BuntyB]

I have read this with great interest since my son used to only eat plain rice, pasta, and bread, but surprisingly will have vegetable soup- but not veg on a plate.

 

We have let him eat his bland food, while we had sauce on ours.

He got interested in cooking when he was about 8 or 9 after he went to an Asian foodstore and saw all the spices etc, so I let him make curry. Amazingly he liked what he made, and whenever we have had a take-away, he has begged to try although it was a taste of OUR food- we didn't buy him any.

He came to associate Thursday night with staying up late as a treat and trying new food- now he will eat a range of stuff, but not meat unless it's chopped and in a sauce. However, there is only one type of sandwich he will eat- a 'butter sandwich'!