Enid

I find this sooo difficult, my ds is 12, his younger brother and sister are 5 and 9, the nine year old understands, but the 5 yr old does copy the behaviour and learns soo many choice words and even copys facial expressions, that I too have had to tell them both, look he is autistic and you cannot act that way, but in the little ones eyes he see`s his older brother getting away with things as I try to ignore as much as possible at times to avoid a major meltdown, especially when driving!

[don`t have any answers but can relate to your problem as my DS who has been behaving very differently over the last few months has now started to wake up in a panic between midnight ish to 3 ish, he shouts and screams and crys, the other night I gave him some cough medicene and told him it was to help him sleep and whether it was coincidence or not he did! have tried it again tonight, will let you know, I have a meeting with CAHMS on friday and am hoping they will help, he is at the moment having a 4-6 week assessment, with CAHMS, where he goes 4 days a week, 9-3, and school on friday, to see if they can help to get to the bottom of what has changed his behaviour so much, Hope you get some sleep, off for a glass of red! find that helps!! Enid I

Awful, my ds read it today an said, I`m going to do that, as it was my youngest sons 6th birthday, we had alot of balloons about, as he is always threatening to kill himself these days, I tooks all the balloons off the walls, the birthday boy was distraught, an my 9 yr old dd said, I love him but he ruins everything these days, I tend to agree although I didnt say so.

Hev. just to say I know how you feel, my ds aged 12 has been so awful lately that the other 2 little ones are scared of him and it really is affectin them. He challanges me in front of them all the time, torments them, and his language is disgusting! and they hear it. He has started throwing things at me and also putting himself in front of me when I try to leave a room, very threatening, some days I think I cant take it another minute, don`t know where its all going to end. Enid

HI I havn`t posted for a while as have had computor trouble. but am having an awful time with my ds aged 12. His latest phase is sitting and its very powerful. If he dosn`t want to go anywhere he just sits and cuts off, he is a big boy and impossible for me to move, its getting to the stage where I am scared to take him anywhere as if he dosnt want to go home when we do he just sits!!!! any advice will be gratefully received

since my son has been going through a very strange phase this last few months, he has made very similar comments to me, he is 12. Like you I havnt discussed this with anyone, till now!!! but he has lately, when I have told him off, made the exact same comment. Enid

My 12yr old son has just started refusing to bath or shower, I think its all part of control with him at mo, I am ignoring it for now but its soo annoying. Enid

Hi, I know how you feel as police had to be involved with my ds aged 12 three times between xmas and new year, I just could not control the violence, ss told me that if it carried on they could get a place of safety order as he was a danger to himself and the younger ones, I was terrified, it seems to have calmed for now but he is on lots of meds, I am still walking on eggshells most of time tho, I know none of this will help much BUT I do know just how you feel. Enid

When my DS is at his worst it is very hard not to give in, the not knowing how long it will go on for and how much damage will be done, especially to things that are hard to replace like precious ornaments and photos, make me wonder at the time if it is worth it, although of course I know it is in the long run! Sorry you are having a bad time at the mo. Enid

Been meaning to reply to this for ages, my son is on 30 mg Equasum XL for ADHD it dosn`t seem to effect him much at all that I can see, it is a slow release drug, he has it at 7.30, and school, when he`s at one, say they see a big improvement in the afternoon, the days he dosnt get sent home by then! When its wearing off about 4pm he is as high as a kite, he takes 15mgs of fast acting ritalin about 4 to 5 depending whats happening and we have 3 hrs of calm, you can see it working, he does then have a silly hour between 8 and 9 but the little ones are in bed by then and it dosnt seem to effect his sleeping. hope this is of some help.

I would say it depends how old he is! my 18 yr old (normal)! was really moody about 15 to 17 it seemed to last for ever!! he`s lovely now. my 12 yrd old asd adhd mld, has just started a very difficult phase, could be hormones, or just his probs, no one seems to know, let you know when he`s 18!!

Hi, My ds was excluded from his primary school in yr 6, 7 days after getting new full-time worker who changed everything immediately, he keep leaving school and going to the police! he was out of school for over a year before it was sorted out, he has only just started back at a special school, he has a taxi and it has taken all this time and effort to get the funding, it nearly sent me mad. Then just when I got school sorted out his behaviour at home has now changed, perhaps he can only be good for so long! Yes I do find it soo frustrating!!!!!

THANKS. a few weeks ago I Wouldnt have even been asking these questions, Am going to look into it just in case things get worse, or don`t get better! how do you go about it?

I can tell you know what we are going through, has your son always been violent? If they are in residential school do you still have full parental rights? Today has been a good day so far and he went to bed fine last night but I am on red alert all the time untill he`s alseep.

on Phone today Pead at CAHMS said to me in 25 yrs she had never seen or heard of a child who changed so profoundly in such a short space of time, they keep asking me if he has had access to drugs but he never goes anywhere, only drugs he has are those they give him! At the moment he is playing dressing up with his 2 younger siblings, just like the old J, but am on tenderhooks as if anything goes wrong he will react, am already nervous about bedtime tonight and am exhausted!

Thanks, It does help to know you are not the only one going through it. Last night he wouldn`t go to bed for 1st time ever, he just sat in chair and said I am not going and you can`t make me, don`t know why he is so very difficult these day, I ignored him totaly and when I went up at 11ish he did to but I feel he is controling me more and more. At least he wasnt violent so thank god for small mercies, but it means I has no "me" time, and I need it!

As police were involved last time, new years eve!, we now have a social worker, he has said to me that if he keeps having these rages he wouldnt be allowed to stay at home as he would be a danger to himself and the younger ones, we have never before been involved with social services and I would now be wary of asking for help, but how on earth do you and others cope with the violence, we are new at this as until just before christmas he was a little sweetheart at home, school has always been a problem, then all hell was let loose and we cant seem to get back on track, I look at him these days and dont recognise him, he has had EEG and blood tests and we are awaiting the results. Consultant at CAHMS said to me today on phone that in 25 yrs she has never seen such a profound change in a child for what seems to be no apparant reason. He has been ill for last 2 days with flu bug and we have all visably relaxed, and I feel so guilty for enjoying the peace and the lack of worry.

I felt at point break yesterday, my ds aged 12 has not had a meltdown since last sun but its been brewing all week, we were all out yesterday at a play park we always go to and he was manic, off the wall, I decided to leave and when we got home he refused to take his meds, he did eventually, but was brooding and menacing all evening, my 2 younger ones are so scared of him when he is like that, I managed to avoid a meltdown but was sick with fear all evening, as one wrong word can set him off.

Hi, My ds had a meltdown on sunday, He returned from respite and we were so so glad to get him home, he`d had no violent episodes since being put on the resperidol, after four days at home he suddenly started acting very strange, hitting the 5 and 9 yr old with a ruler and staring at me to see wot I would do, I got them up to my room and blocked door, he was manic and menacing, started throwing eggs at me and cream!!! He rang 999 10 times at least and told them to come and get him, I rang my 18yr old who god love him rushed home to help, he dragged him to his room and when I went in later to turn tv down as I walked past bunk, he was on top, he hit me twice on head, I nearly went down, I cant believe he did that, he is really upping violence each time. He was starting school next day so may have bin about that, anyway next morning he said I`m not going and you cant make me, I dragged all covers off and tried to physically drag him out of top bunk, I WAS SO MAD. Anyway 18 yr old came to help and we got him out and dressed him, He spit medication at me and poured water down my head, when taxi arrived I marched out, still in pj`s!!!! and said he`s in there if he won`t come we will carry him out, he came! I could not beleive I had sent him like that, no breakfast, not washed, felt terrible, but you know what? he came home with report to say excellent, hardworking and cheerful all day! he has been there 3 days now and so far so good.

It is 0.5mg twice a day! I asked to see it today as my son is still at respite, so must have heard wrong although I double checked as thought it was high. He is home thurs so glad its sorted out. thanks.

Panic over! even though I checked with pead yesterday I insisted I look at his meds when I went to respite today, it is 0.5mgs!!!!! twice a day, so one of us is hearing wrong, but how easy would that be for such a mistake to be made. DS seems fine and staff say he is def ready for home, so will visit Tues and then take him home thurs, will keep you all posted how it goes.

Thanks, he does seem back to his old lovely self, bit worried about the high dose of resperidol though compared to everyone else, he seems fine on it and I checked with consultant this morning who assured me it was correct, anyone else got a 12yr old on such a high dose, 5mg twice a day?

HI, My ds aged 12 has just been prescribed resperidol, he has 5mg at 8 and again at 5. This seems to be a large dose compared to others, but he has recently had some pretty extreme and frightening behaviour. After 10 days on it he is calm and friendly and loving, but he does have a medicated look in his eyes so maybe the dose is too high?