rainbow queen

hi -im bit better today thanks......... my gp is aware of it all....ive sent her several letters about it all-also his social worker and school.ive just posted off a letterabout it all to camhs -my appointment is in march.am going reprint letter and send to autism team as well. im asking about medication as well as no one has ever even disscussed that with us.

hi -im bit better today thanks......... my gp is aware of it all....ive sent her several letters about it all-also his social worker and school.ive just posted off a letterabout it all to camhs -my appointment is in march.am going reprint letter and send to autism team as well. im asking about medication as well as no one has ever even disscussed that with us.

great thread xxxx in need of them hugs thank you............i think the other reason i was in tears last night over it all -is my dear mum is going into hospital on mon for a hip replacement -i will be going to look after her and my dad as much as i can over coming months..........shes my rock and im going miss not being able to talk to her about my son ...........i dont want to be stressing her out so ive decided not to talk about my boys anymore to her while shes going through this .........so am feeling a bit lost.... they are both in there 70s and im worried for her so much. <'> >< <'> >< <'> >< <'> >< <'> >< >

thanks for all your replys.... i am going to put it all down in a letter to send to camhs before appointment i think i need to as they dont know half of what goes on.............i shall just be frank about it and say how do you expect me to carry on like this.......... i have been referred to autism team -but issues we covered in last meeting did not really cover the agression...........i am being given traffic light system ect and pecs to deal with changes ect........... i think my problem is i hold back the bad stuff too much -and folk think oh shes ok shes coping im not really -life is ###### to put in nicely -i dont want to blame my son but what do you do.............i shall just have to state it all and see what happens. the ###### days are all merging into each other and theres no breaks in between anymore........its like a dripping tap ....wearing you down little by little....... excuse me sounding morbid...........i have noone else to even chat to about this? they are all sick of hearing it .

at what stage does it have to get to before medication is thought about? i shall be asking them at camhs -when i go in march my sons been taking iq since he was 2 -i belive this has helped him educationally with his subjects........ he was dx in may last year .........since about then or id say before his anger has gone alot worse -and hes now very aggressive to me -this used to happen mostly around changes and transitions but recently its like he wants to pick arguments with me over most things.........he will be 7 in june. i would rather not have him on medication -im on meds myself........but im seriously started to doubt my ability to control him when he gets agressive with me -or his brother.he runs round the house jucking things about/screaming and wailing/hits me /hits his brother/bites me /refuses to co-operate over basic things/threatens me/ect ect do you think i have the right to have this discussed at camhs ? sometimes i feel i dont tell them enough of what really goes on at home...........at school hes a star

hope your ok? what are you taking? i had my meds changed while back and feel like im going downhill at moment -am trying to get appointment at my gps also to try and change back. <'> ><

ive calmed down a bit now -my son has just about -ive just been reading this http://groups.msn.com/TheAutismHomePage/outofcontrol.msnw this is the bit i should of done -my fault really -i ended up adding fuel to it -but its hard to do this while your on the street -on the pavement and in the car -i manage it at home just about ............. 1. Stop intervening. By this time you have probably tried talking calmly to the person, yelling at the person, restraining the person, etc. If these things have not worked up to this point - stop doing them. Do not talk to the person, stare at the person (watch them with your peripheral vision), or touch the person (except for safety). These steps may not calm the person down but they will take away some of the fuel to his out of control behavior. When a person is attacking you, you have the right to defend yourself. This is best achieved through defensive and blocking moves. i have realy problems leeting it go my son does not -i end up feeling low for hours after and then my son snaps out of it as though it never happened theres no point trying to talk about it either though ive read that social stories may help with this ........

having just spent another nightmare 40 mins trying to get my son to leave a class mates house and into my car............. im in tears now writing this.......... they had to shout the door on us to get him out of the house.............then he wouldnt get in the car -had to struugle making him get in seat then had to pull over twice as he was booting me in back and undooing seatbelt -ended up losing my temper and folk were gawping through the windows watching it all i feel i am losing my grip on controlling him and nobody listens really -going backk in march to see camhs -it will be same old tale -they dont want to prescribe medication -hes really abusive to me and this has increased of late. i wouldnt be at all suprised if the police didnt call round -most likely some one will report us at this rate am going to look for restraining seatbelts on the net ? do any of you have these at all? i cant think of anything else that will work -in fact nothing works at the time -ive been told by school to play music cds in the car...............what a load of ######## in fact tonight i took one with me and my other son was listening to it -when my asd son relised id got it as it was his for xmas this also sent him on one .............i cant do right for wrong anymore............

good news -as in you know what i mean.......after waiting so long....

i thought id join in with this thread as i relise its very hard to see the postives sometimes and i get very stuck in a negative cycle myself..........i relise that there is many positives in a day -even if they are just small windows of them -and i now try to savour them when i can...... today has been a very good day -my son was good for me this morning (one of major things that we are trying to sort out at mo-the morning routine) and also at home time i worked double hard when i picked him up and all through tea time to try and help him stay calm ....and it worked too..........so feeling very happy

yes my son is the same -it hadnt struck me till reading this post -he wont acknowledge class mates outside school grounds -even on pavement outside school......also this was highlighted to me in half term that we went to the park and he saw a older lad there who is a volunter at like a youth group for disabled kids where my son goes in hols sometimes................he was very upset that hed seen him but refused to admit it was him..............this went on for a good 30 mins ...till i ended up saying yes it is him but you find that hard dont you because hes here in the park and hes not where you usually see him -and he fully agreed with that....so i went on to say well hes on a day off and hes come to the park .....but yes it is still the same person ect ect......took about 45 mins and then he agreed -now at one time i would have argued about this but now i relise this is what it is .......seeing someone in a different environment -bit like the homework thing /school.

<'> >< <'> >< im sorry but i may be in the minority here but ive had it with men-im 32 by the way -and i think they are all ######## i know i know -its just ive not met the right one -that line starts wearing thin after a while...lol but yeah ive pretty much given up i was seeing someone last year till sept when he finished with me with no reasons why{have to add he was a mummys boy and general good for nothing ...excuse me but thats the bottom line} then i a week after he had on his profile on net that he was engaged to a 21 year old in america who hed never met.i think that about swung it for me along with the rest of them..........ive often wondered if theres any dating sites for parents of special needs children because ive now come to my expert conclusion only somebody whos in my position can truly understand.....and i cannot even begin to waste my time trying to educate another guy who has no clue whatso ever. xxx so heres some hugs for you <'> >< <'> >< <'> ><

awwwww <'> >< <'> i too get myself worked up in a state about my son ......it seems at times he gets pleasure out of winding me up..........hes very manipulative -i know thats awful to say but he is .........he plays me of with him then will change it and play me off with his brother ect ect.....whatever gives the best argument...........then he goes bed ...and i then sit crying for an hour feeling guilty for shouting ..........but at the end of the day all im asking him to do is basic things -like take your clothes off......put your shoes on..........i know i know i should stick to the visual board but sometimes when hes got one on him that does not even work.im quite worried really ,if this is what its like now -im not sure how on earth ill manage him at 14-like your son -it must be really really hard i think your doing a wonderful job hev .. i know thats not much help to you ...but ive read your previous posts and i truly admire your courage......and detication.xxx

i have 2 boys one is dx asd the other is not dx but i feel he is on the spectrum-not as severe as my other son but deffo has the same mind set about things........as well as very active .

So sorry to hear this news. regards rq xxx

hope your ok <'> >< <'> had a similar day with my son -took him out to the park agaisnt his will really as my other son wanted to go on his bike-he humiliated me for 30 mins in front of folk....and wailed and cryed all the way back to the carpark,not a good day really,my fault for pushing it ....

hi just following on from the other thread id made about positive news and school meeting. well i went to it and some from from parent partnership/sons social worker/salt/senco/2 teachers. it lasted an hour and a half and bottom line was he would not get a statement-even if they appyled as hes doing incredibally wel in all subjects in fact coming top of his group in many.which i can belive as just lately hes had times tables to do and i stood there stunned as he reeled them off to me without no help...........hes good with numbers and memory like that. hes only on a iep as other people are involved and hes not on one for an education point of veiw. it really is good news. i also got my chance to point out all the trouble im having to which they did understand,i came away feeling bit jaded but other sugestions was made to how more help can be given as in like time table used to cover coming out of door -into car ect before i pick him up.... and more aware of the changes and noise trouble.......and help with moving into year 3 ect and everyone informed of my sons difficulties ect........... notes were taken from all people there so i felt on a whole it went well..........as i felt they did listen to me.....i have to add this primary is autistic provision.........id moved him from another to this one at the start of year 1 as the other school were awful and not listening one bit-have to add that was pre dx but all problems were still there its just they didnt want to know. so in all i felt it was usefull and more usefull by the fact i took other people along with me as i belive they took more notice. so thats where im up too at moment also have lady who came out to home with more ideas to help at home,and ive got another camhs appointment through for march...............in which i want to tell them about the not leaving the house stuff and anger problems -as hes become quite abusive towards myself.......and very argumentative all the time over everything. thanks for reading rq xxx

hello <'> >< rq xxx

hello brook hope all is well. rq xxxx

good news .......... <'> ><

hi all just posting some positive update had a lady out to my house today who was fantastic from the cheshire autism team-spent 2 hours telling her it all and she understood everything. shes going be making me up some charts ,gave me several more pecs and now and then chart,and traffic lights to use. shes also going get in touch with a lady who will either come to school meeting this fri or will go into school after to see what more can be done to help my son. so i still havnt applyed for a statement as yet-im waiting to see whats said at this meeting -i have my sons social worker coming along to back me up/parent partnership/lady from the hospital who helped dx my son. they have mentioned about individual pupil funding and that the school has to apply for that...... so im feeling a bit more positive .......and at the end of the day if nothing changes i will apply for the statement myself. so i feel the school are now taking alot more notice now i have brought other people into the situation,and also rather than me going along trying to cope and not saying alot .........ive made my feelings known ect about just how serious it all is and how i feel we are going downhill at a fast rate. rq xxx

ooo eck now that has thrown me i dont have any credit cards thought i could do it through bank.....but yeah i couldnt do with that extra stress would really mess me up---not got many folk to ask for help with things you see....(single mum) and a self confessed hermit

thanks for replys bet i sound like im from cave man days...lol i just couldnt deal with it if things go wrong ect...and you have to start contacting folk ect ect ...gets me in a mess -not good at dealing with things(sometimes think im on autistic spectrum ) but would be a great help i think if i could work it out .......i see these people have that board maker thing ....costing about �200 or something ...............so thats how they doing it good.

hi ive found loads good stuff that i am really in desperate need of on e bay for my son-like all the pec things and to do list things ect ect i did buy a laminator but it takes forever doing all the stuff and can only mange basic things............. ive just regestired at e bay and was looking at the paypal thing................reason im reluctant to sign up for it is having to deal with more hassel-i easily get in a mess with things is it easy to do ect?? thanks xxx

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=0hhm0NHhCBg Laurie Anderson - O Superman