av16

Hi Kathryn The parents advice people have suggested I email the LEA head of SEN in advance of the panel meeting, I had sent them an email already but of course no reply today so I've copied it and sent it to the head as she suggested. I've quoted all the relevant stuff but I feel that as he goes to a school outside of our borough they are doing all they can to delay doing anything. Thanks for your advice, it's much appreciated. BW AV

My son, due to many and varied incidents during lunchtime has a lunchtime club everyday, other children just get 1 a week. He also has his TA for the last 10mins of break to calm him down and 'prepare' him for the afternoon. (Unfortunately they finish this week so there may be some upsets next week). They are all sports orientated which suits him; if you could think of anything your son might enjoy it might be worth suggesting. If they are kept occupied in something fairly structured they enjoy with adequate supervision it really does help them. BW AV

PSA go & enjoy the film, I hope you hear tomorrow, I am so angry about my situation I wouldn't wish it on you too. I've been watching yours and Karen A's progress as we are all at a similar stage. I hope you get sorted out soon for your sanity; keep strong! AV

Thanks for the replies; I have sent an email to our parent advice centre, hopefully they will get back tomorrow. AV

Thanks Annie for your very detailed reply, the LEA have not informed me of any exceptional circumstances- do they need to? The letter giving notice under section 323(1) or 329A(3) Ed Act 96 is dated 19th April so surely the 10 weeks is up? Thanks again AV

Hi, can anyone give me a bit of advice please. My LEA turned us down for stat assessment originally then in April I received a letter dated 19th saying that they had decided to assess, a further letter was sent on 26th of April. By my reckonning we should hear from them on 12th July, I rang today to see if they could give me any info and was told it's not going to panel until the 19th of July. I am so angry especially as I originally applied in January and they were too lazy to contact any of the agencies involved. Now we wont know if they will fund the lsa who has kept our son out of trouble since she started in May. I am so so angry! Is there anything I can do? I mentioned the 12weeks and they said they work to the code of practice(their own I think. AV

Hello, exactly the same thing happened to us- assessment turned down because the school hadn't done enough, even though our son (AS) had had 2 exclusions. The school had put several things in to place but the LEA hadn't contacted them or the EP. Once we had an EP report and a submission from the behaviour support team the LEA changed their mind. Have the school involved the EP? It may be a good idea to push for their involvement as well as going for the appeal. Any extra evidence you can get can only help. Good luck, it's going to be hard work but keep strong. All the best AV

Well done Karen! I'm really pleased for you both. AV

Congratulations & well done! Best wishes AV Enjoy celebrating

My son (AS 9) loves football, he plays for a team but if he doesn't perform well enough (in his view) he will cry for hours afterwards. He also has a season ticket for Spurs and goes with his dad. He sits and watches intently, shows no emotion unless the team he thinks should win starts to lose! He knows league positions and works out who should win and gets really upset if things don't work out according to his plan. He has no loyalty to Spurs if he thinks they should lose. He's watched some of the world cup but can't sit still for long, as with you he wants to fill in the wall chart. I think he enjoys it just for the facts- who's the tallest/oldest player etc. Most of the time it keeps him happy.

I would agree with what you have all said. My son (9) AS, went skating with his sister & her friends, they whinged about their skates being uncomfortable all afternoon & I spent ages going back & getting them fitted with new ones. Son on the ice for 2 1/2 hours solid - no complaints but when he took his boots off he had 2 large blisters on each shin, the scars were with him for 6 months but he had not made 1 complaint. Show him a speck of blood though and he goes to pieces. I agree it's very worrying that they don't acknowledge pain. I think it has contributed to mine getting in to more trouble at school, he isn't bothered if he's kicked hard so he can't understand it when he does it back & other kids scream & cry!

As some of you may know my 9yr old son was diagnosed AS but turned down for a SA within the same week. Fortunately his school, the paed/child psych and myself all sent in further submissions and the LEA changed their minds and agreed to progress to a stat assess. He has been seen by the Ed Psych attached to the school and now the Ed Psych from the LEA where we live (different LEA to school) and hooray agrees with everything they say and I say and is pushing for a statement and more help . So far we can't get ASD outreach support because the 2 LEA's wont provide it (He isn't from the borough where the school is located and the borough where we live wont work out of borough). He is pushing for an arrangement to provide ASD outreach support for son and school too . Thanks to everyone who made me feel better when times were bad and it shows that sometimes if you keep pushing you may get some success. A very happy AV

Our son was dx AS in March, assessed by paed & child psychiatrist. We told them about school experience, no visit. Why is it so confusing? Why can't we have one path to follow? BW & good luck AV

As a yr 3 teacher no way would I consider giving this to a child in my class and if any parent says their child dislikes their book for whatever reason I change it. When I read things like this it makes me ashamed of my profession- I agree with everyone complain and get the teacher to realise the effect this book has had on your child. Good luck

Have you or the school tried social stories? I have written one on this subject for a child in my class. I'm also trying to get the school my son goes to to try them with him. It's too early yet to say if it will work for me but I know that they can be successful. I could try & email it to you if you'd like a look at it. BW AV

I thought we were the only family like this! It's good to read it's not just us. Everywhere we've been in the past is coloured by the screaming that went on before our son(8) was dx, by the time he got to 5 it was constant moaning and wanting to go home. He's still like it now but we try to explain everything to him, don't go anywhere with too many queues and hope they have a playground. I don't think many people realise how difficult a simple thing like shopping can be for families with a child with ASD.

Really sad and sorry to hear your news. Look after yourself. AV <'>

The Behaviour support team and Ed Psych are meeting me in son's school this week and will support me when I say they need to forget about sanctions etc and focus on making his day as stress free as possible. I will keep you posted. AV

[ Not allowing him to attend any lunchtime clubs is not only unfair but it takes away a safety/comfort zone that he desperately needs. That is likely to cause extreme anxiety and distress. They should have ensured he got into them, as much for their benefit as his, this would/should be considered 'a reasonable adjustment' on their behalf to help him cope. What reasons were given to him for not being allowed to attend? Ask them! I am writing this now at home- my Head sent me home (in a supportive way)as I'm so stressed out & upset I'm not able to teach. Yesterday I went into school and discovered that as he hadn't reapplied to be in the lunch clubs other than for 1 day- the rule is 'only 1 club a week' he hadn't been included in any others. His PSP states daily lunch clubs and although he only applied for 1 (following the rules) no one thought to put his name on the lists for the others. I have called the Behaviour support team who agree with me that they still haven't got 'in his head' to work out what triggers the bad behaviour but want to focus on sanctions. I feel so let down as I've worked so hard to keep them informed. I'm feeling the worst I have ever done today

He was diagnosed with AS on 1st March this year, the school have a copy of the diagnosis along with a report from the Ed psych who detailed his needs. He was violent yesterday, kicking chairs and tables and the class teacher removed the rest of the children from the class for their Health & Safety. He will not leave the class when asked even though he knows he is not in trouble. He doesn't want to leave as he 'wants to be normal'. Thanks for responding!

My AS son -8yrs, as you may know dislikes school, he had a bad meltdown yesterday due to a) not having his trainers in school so he couldn't play football at break, he got stuck in numeracy - it was money & he has a bit of a block with it then the last straw c) he was told he didn't get a place in any of the lunchtime clubs which are really important to him, he was in 4 last term. Today get home to find a letter from school saying any more melt downs like yesterday and he will be excluded permanently. I feel sick with worry, what can I do? I've spent hours talking to them but they think he has control over himself and because he's bright they don't see that small things to us are enormous to him. HELP!

My AS son (8) really hates school, he's been back for just 2 days and they've not been good. I spent an hour yesterday with the Head, SENCO & class teacher discussing his challenging behaviour- running out of class and around the school, occasional tantrums/screaming & making loud silly noises in class. I decided today to find out what he dislikes about school and we've started a list. He hates it when - the teacher pretends she doesn't know something just for the 'slow' kids - he gets cross when other children don't understand things - the teachers treat him differently to the 'normal' (his word) kids but he can't say how - he hates it when children show off - he doesn't like the boys toilets-'they don't look nice' - after doing work for a while it gets boring and his hand aches from writing - he doesn't like it if he doesn't get chosen to answer questions/ do something in front of the class etc. - he doesn't like playtime as he always gets chosen to be 'it' - he gets upset if there's nothing for school dinner that he likes This is just the start I think, of getting him to say what he really feels. How do I and the school tackle this lot? For starters I suppose he could have packed lunch. Do any of your children say things like this? Have you any ideas that could help? The school are trying to get an LSA for him- last one left after a few days- not because of him they said(?), they are getting some support from the local behaviour team and are going to try social stories. I want him to be happy but I don't know how. Sorry this is so long! AV

Hi,I'm not an expert but as I understand it Asperger's Syndrome is a disorder on the autistic spectrum, so no she doesn't have two things. Hope you're ok, have a rest over the holiday. There'll be lots more helpful posts on here later. At least the wait is over now! bw AV

Hi, my son was dx on 1st March AS, even though I would have been amazed if he hadn't been diagnosed I was tearful all day so the advice on here is spot on. Whatever happens I hope it all goes well for you and your daughter. I recovered from the 'shock' quite quickly because there's always another hurdle to start working on. Stay strong for your family, best wishes to you all.

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