31770

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Brilliant thanks; this has been goin' on for many a month over many subjects; so procastination is not likely - seemingly I don't deserve any information ever. That said she was very accommodating when listening to me trying to describe something that can't be described, so it swings in roundabouts.

Hi folks. I was wondering if there is a name for/phobia or otherwise descriptive method for a person who, regardless of how damaging their taking no action is, will never make a decision. Contrary to what several of my friends have expressed I don't believe one of my old lady friends used me as an outlet for her not-so-savoury ex problems. Ironically the problem is that I can't make decisions on account of not being able to identify real and calculated emotions - she can't because either she's a monster (I don't believe this yet) or maybe there is more to it. Anyway I thought this would be the best place to start. I have tried talking to her about it but that is fraught with the same issue. I physically require the information, it is eating right through me and has already been a main factor in the collapse of my career. Cheers, 31770

I agree that posting an opinion on subjects as important and potentially life changing as this is somewhat of a faux pas, then again any response to a question such as this which is predisposed should be considered dangerous as it may directly affect the decisions made of a reader. I suppose I would not be comfortable with the idea of someone with AS being put on anti depressants on a whim by their gp, of course in hindsight I should have mentioned that I wasn't diagonsed at the time and was passed of as just being depressed. That said I would oppose the notion but would never intervene, although I'd likely offer to discuss my experience with them if only so they have information from boths sides of the coin. Judging by the number of views (12742 Views) this is an important topic form many people with AS and it wouldn't be unreasonable to argue that where there no posts on negative experiences this thread would be far more dangerous.

Hi darkshine I kind of suspected the "cure" part was not born in gravitas lol. I thought a reference to the positive aspects might be in good stead with regards to the post as a whole. As for the two points you've listed: One of the most simultaenously beautiful and disgusting elements of internet forums is the way people use them. Mining posts is an largely a meta persona that (I'd speculate) is an extension of a desire to be respected or considered a reliable source of relevant information that sadly is not always explicitly linked to the desire to have the knowledge that is paramount to such a position. In short the method is simply to respond to as many posts as possible, regardless of how innane the response is, with an end goal of accumulating a high post count or high activity level which may give the impression that the person is at the very least lovingly passoinate about the topic. If you ever visit reddit I'm sure you'll be aware of their equivalent "karma whoring". Although their site isn't of the same nature of a dedicated forum, the principle is much the same - People crave to be seen as important, not everyone cares how they go about getting that status. Self assertion: (in some ways can be tied to the aforementioned). There are few people in the world who don't believe that they have the perfect moral balance. In the same way that people aren't interested in questions or views that contradict their beliefs it is not uncommon for people to assume that everyone else needs their input in order to live a morally balanced life. Once again reddit is good example here in that they tackled the matter head on and created the "circlejerk" sub reddit where people can "Have all your crazy values reaffirmed." Sort of a ironic joke aimed at displacing such comments to a place where people go solely to see such comments. Possibly a bit long winded in response. I realise that in commenting on the above in my first post I may seem to be being slightly unsupportive but that isn't what was intend. Essentially what I meant was as long as you manage your expectations of what constitutes as a response (in a world of internet trolls) then you can rest assured that someone will respond to your posts. The first response received in a thread may not be helpful, perhaps even insulting, but the reply counter is a fruit of curiosity to the causual forum browser and in time will likely entice others to read the thread and hopefully make a relevant and helpful comment. For the record: I don't consider myself to be an authority on the behavioural traits of forum users but I'm sure many people who have spent a lot of time on forums (again in speculation, more so with lurkers) will hold similar views.

*...seriously and have pronlems in dealing with... Should clarify my comment in abstract is a problem with expressing my opinion regardless of whether or not the expression could be considered a faux pas. Not exclusive to love or any other emotion/view.

Hi darkshine. Generally you'll find that people on forums are pretty accommodating when it comes to responding to threads even when they are initially unable to provide help or introspective on the subject. Whether it's advice, curiosity, mining post counts or simply a respnse fueled by arrogant self assertion you can gaurantee that someone will respond... even if the response is just to comment on the nature in which people post comments on the internet. As for the cure you're looking for: None that I'm aware of although the compulsive quest to understand and question everything is one that can be very rewarding and certainly and positive one. That said obviously where the owner of the introspective questioning perceives the topic to be negative it can be harrowing. Not sure if that helps, nonetheless you can rest assured the forum will support you in efforts to gain understanding.

I personally feel, from experience, that anti depressants are very dangerous for people with asperger's. I was put on a course of them in 2008 and subsequently partook what I consider to be the most dispicable group of actions I've ever taken. This ended in a few admissions to a psychiatric ward of which I ended up straight back in after discharge until the treatment was stopped. I am very ashamed of my actions from around this point in my life and as a result I would strongly oppose the idea of anyone else I meet with asperger's taking them.

I'm the opposite in respect of significant others. If I fall in love with someone (that said there has only been one person, it's happened twice with a large intermission inbetween) I physically can't prevent myself from telling them. It started the downfall of and has nearly cost me the best friend (or at least the person I've most contected with) I've ever had and has definitely prevented us from ever reinitiating a relationship. I take the notion of loving someone very seriously and have in dealing with the immorality that is commonly displayed in the relationships held by others. Lol I'm destined to remain in the anthropomorphic relationship I've developed with my computer Doropthy (yes the "p" is meant to be there)

I listen to music in a similar manner. For me the drumbeat need to be really upbeat(double kick etc), or music with a lot of layers. I listened to Bela Fleck and the Flecktones - Live at the quick almost exclusively for around 8 months last year, with a tendency to repeat big country several times, skipping back on the Q&A section between the bass and alto saxophone.

I've had similar problems with the family. I'm 24 and have recently received the same diagnosis. My cousing and his partner (my best male and female friend respectively) have stated that there is no way that the pyschologist is correct and that my parents are just horrible people. For the record my parents weren't exactly the best in that they tended to view my sister and I as battle currency but I spent most of my childhood with my grandad and consider my childhood to have been pretty good in respect of parental influence. I suppose what I'm getting at is that family members can be very closed minded at times and the important thing isn't to waste time on changing their opinions simply to make sure that their opinions don't govern how you handle the situation.

It's nit picking like this that has cost me many a friend lol.

Mimicing was perhaps not the best choice of word. Studying how others react to situations and using that as a framework for similar situations when they present themselves. I'd say more relating to primary fields of interest although they're technically obsessive thoughts. The default could be better described as a constant chain of thought that is always present, even when you're not consciously thinking about the subject you can still feel the chain of thoughts dominating your passive cognitive processing as a constant.

Are you able to identify triggers for a change in mood? I tend to find I my mood changes, sometimes drastically depending on the contnet, throughout statements made by third parties whether relating to me or not. Other triggers I've noticed are when people break unwritten rules, always put your rubbish in the bucket etc. Identifying your triggers is probably a good idea. If there's one thing I've observed it's that when things are good, they're exceedingly great, when they're bad they're catastrphic Unrelated: I've read two of your threads this evening and the signatures were "XKLX" and "XKX" respectively, which is correct? Sorry in advance if this seems like nit picking, just curious and new to the forum so I don't have any older points of reference.

Wish I'd left it alone now. (some post)views 0 - view the thread - return to forum - (some post) views 0 On saying that I'd imagine registering every forum view to DB would be strenuous of it's hosting server so I'd imagine it'll make a cheeky xml file for each view and read the containing directory every x minutes updating the DB.