Kathryn

Hi loulou and welcome, Yes our situations sound eerily similar I'm glad you have finally got your assessment. It's a long hard battle even to get that far - did the school eventually support you in your request? The system sucks. Parents are treated with contempt - the process should be much more transparent and open to scrutiny: there are too many decisions being made behind closed doors whilst the central figures in all of this, ie the children, are forgotten. I hope you end up with a statement, it sounds as though you have a really strong case, keep us updated on how the assessment goes. What kind of educational setting do you think would suit your son best? K

Bluejean- Genie That's great news. I hope things continue on the up from now on. K

Thanks, Nellie, bid, Lisa. I will contact IPSEA. Lisa, I get the feeling our LEA are acting in a similar way - stalling us deliberately. What maddens me is that the decision has actually been made and no one will tell us. We can't decide our next move until we know what the panel decision is. For all we know they might have decided to assess. It makes me furious that they are starting from scratch again and treating it as a completely new case - I suppose there's nothing to stop them doing this but it seems like a deliberate ploy to frustrate us. K

Well, the panel met yesterday and we still don't have a decision (it took me all day to find this out). It appears that they have given us a new six week deadline for this which would take us to the 19th Jan. I had thought that the case would be treated as a continuation of the original request made back in October, not as a completely new case. Now it seems they have an excuse to string this out further. Presumably this means the deadline for appeal will also move forward as the original date was Jan 14. - I jolly well hope so. There's nothing in the COP which mentions what happens when a stat ass request is re-submitted. I feel we are being treated with contempt by the LEA: whilst they play games with deadlines and pieces of paper, my daughter sits at home receiving no education let alone an appropriate one, and we are still a long long way off a statement. I'm tired of being reasonable and following the rules, they seem to be able to bend them anyway they choose to suit themselves. Presumably as her 16th birthday creeps ever closer they will try to use that as an excuse too. I have been told the letters will go out next week - that's completely unacceptable. I'm going to complain now officially to the D.O.E.

Beverley, I'm sorry and not surprised at your frustration. It could be OK as a stopgap and a way of easing him back into the school environment but it seems hardly appropriate as a long term solution. 2 hours is way short of what he should be getting. I have been told that there is something similar in our area which my daughter could go to but I am also worried at the lack of specialist help. How does Ryan feel about it? Would he be motivated to do the subjects on offer?

Thanks for the replies everyone and for the link Nellie. Good luck, Kirstie, with the unit, I'd like to hear how Lewis gets on. We're trying to get my daughter referred to a centre near us which does music and art therapy. I would happily look around and find someone to do it privately but we cannot afford it right now.

Thanks everybody, <'> After a stressful few days trying to make sure everything was ready in time and safely posted off I'm going to forget about it now and enjoy the weekend.

My daughter has expressed an interest in trying music therapy. I think it would really help her as she loves music and it seems to have a calming effect. I don't know anything about it and wondered if anyone had tried it and where.

Well, the next assessment panel meets this Tuesday. We've sent off five more reports for them to read and digest. I've been worrying my head off about it but I know we've done the best we possibly can this time around and I refuse to get stressed out anymore by this ridiculous process.

My daughter had a brief spell of taking an SSRI and it didn't agree with her. We are back on the amytriptyline which helps her sleep and stops anxious thoughts at night. The psych wanted to increase the dose but I don't want to as it dopes her during the day and seems to give her problems with balance. Her anxiety tends to be related to particular thoughts and feelings associated with past experiences of school and we are reluctant just to drug her withougt the appropriate therapy to enable her to deal with these feelings. Until we find this, we will keep her on the minimal dose.

That's great news: have a fantastic weekend, all of you K

Bid, Fantastic news: what a great start! K

Hi Karen, It's an independent one. I think I'll approach them as well as start the tribunal process. The NAS person thinks that the mere mention of SENDIST may well be enough to change their minds, although we'll still have to wait till the next panel meeting, I guess. K

I think they will eventually realise they have to do the assessment. But the length of time the process takes is so frustrating - it will probably take another month to turn this whole thing around and by then it will be nearly Christmas. All this delay just means more stress, more paperwork and every hour I spend dealing with it is an hour less I get to spend with my daughter. It pervades everything; you start to see your own child as a collection of needs and problems and you're happy when a professional describes your child's difficulties as "severe" because you know it will carry more weight.

Well, you both know more than me. I spoke to the autism advisor and the school senco. Its looking as though the report from the autism advisor (which the LEA seem to desperately want) didn't reach the school in time for them to submit it, so I'm hoping we can avoid the tribunal at this stage by sending them this as well as a report from the home tutor, so that they can reconsider the case. Incidentally I couldn't get hold of the senco for two days as he was away on a course on - you guessed it - autism. I told him he could probably have taught it with all he has learned from us. We have been offered disagreement resolution, I don't know if that will help as we are quite clear about what we want: i.e. a statutory assessment . If we say we are willing to do this, will the LEA take this as a sign that we are open to having our minds changed? Lets hope that with the right paperwork in place next time, none of this is necessary.

And thanks Nellie, I've just seen your posts. I used the categories of need in the COP when preparing my evidence. I will plod on but I guess my confidence has just been shaken - didn't expect such a fight at this stage. I'm also wondering if it will be worth the fight with the LEA if she ends up not completing her education in school which I suppose is a possibility, although from what I've heard it's difficult to get funding from the LSC for further ed if you haven't already got a statement. ...Thinking aloud too! K

Hi Helen, I could do, I suppose, and I'd send them anything if I thought it would help. I don't think it's my evidence they're quibbling with here though. The problem is what the school has or hasn't done from its own resources so far. I suppose it's quite unusual to be presented with a case with very little history, in their eyes, anyway. Apart from evidence of extra exam time being applied for in year 9 and a "strategy sheet" (whatever that is) distributed by the SEN department in June, the school's cupboard is bare as far as "relevant and purposeful action" goes, until the beginning of this term, when because my daughter was in school so little, they had no opportunity to try anything. My fear has been and still is that they will wriggle out of the assessment on mental health grounds and refuse to see that her depression is due to problems related to autism and the school's mismanagement of it. Because we went from a standing start in Septmber with all of this, we've had very little time to build up a large body of professional evidence. My daughter has spoken very rarely about what she wants. She doesn't seem to be able to think coherently about the future at all and is clearly traumatised by the past. She gets agitated by any mention of school. She can't speak about it clearly so we have to try and piece together things, sometimes from single words. That is part of the reason why all this is so difficult: we're working in the dark to some extent and having to make decisions for her based on what she might be able to do a year or two from now. Right now she is scared of social contact and very dependent but we hope she won't always be this way.

Well I've had an exhausting two days trying to work out what evidence I can submit to the panel which will press the right buttons and get the answer we want. I finally got to spoke to the chair of the panel yesterday who tried to intimidate me: she asked me all about my daughter and said "well it's a very late diagnosis" as if it was my fault. She wanted to know why I wanted an assessment and I made the mistake of being drawn into a discussion about it. She was very aggressive: "What good will it do? It runs out when she's 16" etc and "all autistic children in (this county) are in mainstream schools" which she kept repeating. I'd like to report her to the DOE but I suppose I shouldn't make enemies just yet. Later in the day my husband got more info out of her about what we need basically something from the autism advisory service to say that they have been involved - and failed. (I did say this in my evidence but hey - I'm only a parent what do I know. )The home tutor (who is lovely) is also going to send in a report for me as they want more evidence about how her autism is impacting on her education (like they haven't had enough??). I'm beginning to discern how "they" think, though. Maybe some LEA's are different but it seems to me its official policy to thwart parents - they tell you nothing and you have to dig and dig for the information you need - it's hardly a transparent process. They give parents the right to apply for a stat ass then try to make you feel as thought you're doing something wrong. This is my first brush with blatant hostility from the LEA and it's left me feeling a bit fragile and questioning whether the whole business is worth it, life is already stressful at home without this onslaught. The NAS advisor was great and said they use these bullying tactics in the hope you will just go away. I have contacted the NAS tribunal support line. I really hope it doesn't come to that. The spirit is willing but the flesh is weak. Really just feel like walking away from it all.

Bid, <'> <'> K

Thanks Nellie K x

Helen, It's a date! I play tennis, and I must say my serve has improved 100% recently. I just picture a few faces I'd like to smash when I toss the ball up..... I'm a placid and cuddly person really, wouldn't hurt a fly. I hope you're feeling a bit better today K

Hi Shaz My daughter has frequently complained of headaches, which she says are more like an uncomfortable pressure at the back of her head. (She wears glasses for shortsightedness). We think it might be stress related as she has been through a lot of stress in the last year, and she has complained less since she has been out of school. She gets angry, however, if we suggest that it is psychological and insists that there must be a physical cause. Partly to pacify her and also to rule out any purely biological cause, we have asked for a referral to a neurological specialist so that this may be thoroughly investigated. We don't think anything significant will be found. Luckily we have a very sympathetic and co operative GP. It might be worth getting Kieran's headaches checked out by a specialist, if only for your own peace of mind. K

My daughter likes the idea as she is so comfortable around computers. But as she uses the computer for recreational purposes she would find it difficult to switch into work mode, I think. It must be a bit like trying to do your homework at a party.

Well here's an update. This is what I would like to say... The Directior of Education phoned to say "I apologise: we seem to have made a dreadful mistake...." Right, back to reality. Spent all day on the phone (so did my husband) trying to speak to the person who chairs the panel to ask her if this is just a procedural blip or if we need to start the appeal process. I'm well aware that there is a time limit for the tribunal process. She wasn't available. She rang my husband's answerphone once. She was "just leaving the building" at 3.30 pm when I phoned. There was no one else I could speak to. She couldn't be avoiding us, by any chance? So we wait till Monday . Our wnderful GP rang about another matter and was speechless when I told her the stat ass had been refused. She said "But they only have to SEE her to realise..." Exactly. How can we get this deeply flawed process changed? K

Bid <'> <'> Excellent news, and well deserved! And well done Auriel, it sounds as though you're going to have a great time at your new school. Your success gives us a boost. If you have any cash to buy a bottle of wine, have a drink for us tonight! (Check your PMs) K xx