Why Good Days & Bad Days?

[Stephanie]

Last night my son seemed like the most non-autistic child ever - he was freely initiating conversation, joining in, talking really well - loud, clear, using long words, great dialogue etc. Even replaying a conversation I had had with him to my husband. He was just very "on the ball" and with it. School also said he had a really good day and I could see from the work he had done that his handwriting was much neater and tidier than it normally is.

 

He sat down at home and did some lovely drawings of Winnie the Pooh - coloured them in, in the right colours ... normally he hates colouring in. They were probably the best drawings he had ever done. He was really proud of them and put them up in the kitchen.

 

He was very loving, he even remembered to make a special point of kissing me goodnight whereas normally he needs to be prompted. He was just different, it kind of gave me a glimpse of what he might be like were he not on the spectrum. Everyone in the house was on a high because of it, it was brilliant.

 

Does anyone know why they have days like these?? I know we all have good days and bad ones (and we have a fair share of those too) ... but does anyone else seem to occasionally have this child who appears to be so NT for a day or so??

 

I wondered if it was anything to do with the development of their brain - I've noticed before that he often has one of these really good days just before he has a growing spurt.

 

I don't think there were any different environmental factors that played a part.

[aro]

Can't really advice, we get this too from dd, but she has epilepsy (complex partials) and this seems to affect her behaviour, since starting a new med she is alot more "with it". Think alot of people find that the ASD symptoms are variable.

 

A x

[curra]

Hi Stephanie,

 

My DS also appears to have good and bad days, and at times it's like he had been misdiagnosed. But these good days are not the norm. Also as he gets older, his behaviour tends to differ more from that of other children of his age. He initiates conversation, talks very well, is very articulate, but he sticks to his own topics and doesn't accept other people's opinions. He can draw very well, but lately it's the only thing he wants to do and even suggesting that he does something else makes him lose his calm. He is also loving and affectionate but in his own way. It's no wonder that ASD has been regarded as a hidden disability. What worries me is that many people still think that these children are just naughty, or deliberately act in ways that do not conform to the social norms. Many teachers in mainstream school don't know how to interact with them and the result is that they are 20 times more likely to be excluded at school than NT children although they can't help being disruptive or aggressive when their needs ar not met. I don't know to what extent their "good/bad" behaviour (= similar/different to what is expected of NT children of the same age) is related to their brains or to environment. I think it's a combination of both factors since they can learn and progress so much when they are in a supportive environment. Maybe your little boy is reacting to your care and support and it would be worth noticing what you did differently, because it was certainly the right parenting!! Or maybe his teacher is giving him more support?

 

Hope your little one continues making so much progress!

 

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Curra

[Bullet]

Ds1 was like this yesterday. He had an appointment with the paediatrician who has a clinic at the school his nursery is attached to. That went well in terms of them observing his behaviour, his lack of interest in other people, his wandering around rather than playing with the toys (it's a new paed). I pointed out there are toys he plays with, but he doesn't show imagination so the selection they had might have not interested him). Then we go out and my friend is babysitting him and his brother while I go to an ASD meeting. Go round to collect them and Ds1 had been sitting on friend's lap, giggling and grabbing her hands to make her tickle him, anticipating when he was going to be tickled, saying "tickle tickle" after she did and sometimes afterwards checking round to see what she was doing.

[cmuir]

Hi Stephanie

 

My son is nearly 5 and I would best describe him as being like Jekyll and Hyde. His consultant has concerns that he may also have a mood disorder (?) on top of an ASD. Robert can be such a sweetheart, then a short time later, like something possessed! It's hard going, but I guess the key is to make the most of the good times.

 

Best wishes.

 

Caroline.

[LizC]

Hi My son matthew is just like carolines, that is exactly how I describe him too! as jekyl and hyde! one minuite he can be fine next he can simply be awful or even agressive then he will be back to calm again! he has problems with concentration (sensory issues with that)

[jb1964]

Hi My son matthew is just like carolines, that is exactly how I describe him too! as jekyl and hyde! one minuite he can be fine next he can simply be awful or even agressive then he will be back to calm again! he has problems with concentration (sensory issues with that)

 

My daughters the same - she's 13 - her emotions can change within the blink of an eye - from calm to aggressive etc. Her emotions are also full force - not part annoyed or part aggressive etc - it is full on (there is no thermostat so to speak).

 

Although she does fluctate her emotional responses - her communication or social interaction doesn't vary in as much as suddenly holding conversations etc - she just answers or asks questions in either a monotone, depressed or extremely high excited way. Although obviously you get more response etc when she's in a happier mode.

 

Take care,

Jb

[JsMum]

There must be something in the air, the warmer autum what ever it is I dont understand it either, but J has been lovely the last few days too, last night his bedtime was perfect, in bed and asleep by 11pm, he was really good this evening too with odd behaviour in the expected places J doenst cope with shopping so he was hyper in the supermarket but as soon as we got home he was great, relaxed and happy.

 

All I can put it down to is a really rigid routine, and I am trying to be more organised, so tea time and playtime, bedtimes ect.....all on time and followed to a T.

 

J has been spontanous and hugging me as well, I AM not complaining but it does make us swing our heads round in disbeliefe when we expect them to be up to no good and then see that they are playing really relaxed.

 

J hasnt been like this for a long time, and I know that its a combination of support, understanding and space.

 

Hope yours lasts just a bit longer,

 

JsMum

[LizK]

Yes definitely so. Adam has days when he is much less autistic than others and although the various professionals involved have desperately tried to figure out what external factors are causing that there really seem to be none. Adam in general is very variable and this has led to him being classed as 'complex' We think he actually cycles from being withdrawn, quiet and much more rigid to being hyperactive, wild and in your face. If you catch him in between he is lovely with enough spark and enthusiasm to stop him being withdrawn and so rigid but still tempered down enough to have reasonable concentration and behaving well.

 

I've been reading Olga Bogdashini's sensory book which has totally opened my eyes about the sensory issues in ASD. In one section she talks about this and quotes a couple of autistic people. One describes it being like on a see saw going up and down through hyper- and hypo- sensitive perceptions of sensory stimul. When they are in the middle they are neither under or over stimulated and see the world as an NT person would. That state of being is fleeting because the see-saw then moves up and down. Interestingly Adam has recently had a sensory assessment and although he is generally hyposensitive to various stimuli the report says he still has some sensory modulation difficulties which is why he can go from being passive, withdrawn and rigid to a hyperactive rampaging monster!

 

Lx