Kai got punched in the face

[loulou]

Hi everyone,

 

Yesterday I posted about Kai having a huge meltdown and attacking my mum after school. I thought it was because i was at work (he's used to me being there when he gets in). The whole meltdown went on until 11.50 last nite when he finally calmed down (phew!).

 

It turns out that one of the boys he shares a taxi with has been calling him "****ing retard" for the last few weeks, which he's upset about. This boy is 11 and Kai is a very young 8. Yesterday the boy punched Kai in the face just as he was getting out of the taxi. The escort told him off, but didn't bother to come and tell my mum what happened . My mum said she thought Kai looked upset, but thought it was because i was not there.

 

He told me it really hurt his nose and made his eyes water .

 

I'm so bl***y angry. Now i have to wait until the new year to report this horrible bully. I asked Kai why he had hit him and he said the boy told Kai he could do it without getting into trouble as it was half-term . I don't want my child sharing a taxi with this kid anymore. I know he has real behavioural problems and has told Kai that he steals from people's gardens and sets fire to things . Kai is still very innocent and naive and i don't want him anywhere near this boy.

 

Grrrrrrrr, rant over!

 

Loulou xx

Edited January 4, 2007 by loulou

[jlp]

That's terrible, poor Kai!

 

No wonder he was so upset yesterday.

 

It must be really frustrating that you can't do much about it until after Christmas, is there any chance of staff still being in school? Does this child attend the same school?

 

Sounds like a totally inappropriate mix of children to travel together.

 

Maybe write everything down including the attack on your mum and resulting meltdown until late at night and keep it for when school goes back - so you have a record of how cross and upset you both are when your feelings are still fresh.

 

Poor Kai! Hope he feels better for telling you.

[Samsam]

Hi I don't post here often but my mum works for our local transport company and I am SURE you could get him moved to a different taxi. Also i wouldn't hesitate trying to call tomorrow about it as I know most welfare transport companies don't finish until tomorrow evening as they still operate runs to day centers.

[hev]

loulou,you can def sort this out,unfortunately steve was winding all the kids up in his taxi and picking on them so he now goes in taxi on his own which is much better for other kids and him.

 

hope kai isbetter tonight <'>

[Platefull of Love]

<'> <'> <'> I am so for Kai having to go through this & then not copeing ( who would ) & your mum getting hurt because of it all. I rerally hope you can get this sorted & he doesn't need to share with this lad, also the lads gets told very strongly its not ok.

[loulou]

Hi,

 

Thanks Hev, Kai is being very good today (for a change)! He is no angel and i know he can be pretty annoying (talking about Power Rangers all the time ), but i don't want him being picked on in the taxi. He used to go on his own, which was much better.

 

JLP, i'll write it all down, maybe send an e-mail to the school so it can be sorted out for the beginning of term. Kai is already saying he's going to "get" this boy .

 

Loulou xx

[Bagpuss]

I'm so shocked that the escort isn't informing you of this Loulou. Surely she should be reporting all incidents, to you and the school. I would still give the transport dept a bell, to see if anyone else is available. Trying to just sit on how you feel until January will be so difficult. You need an explanation of what has been taking place and why no-one has told you. No wonder you are dealing with difficult behaviour from Kai once he walks thru the door, bless him. Good luck and please let us know how it goes <'> <'>

[jlp]

JLP, i'll write it all down, maybe send an e-mail to the school so it can be sorted out for the beginning of term. Kai is already saying he's going to "get" this boy .

 

Loulou xx

 

Good! As for Kai saying he's going to get the boy, well my G would be exactly the same and it would dwell on his mind and fester for two weeks!

 

Let us know what happens. x

[cmuir]

That's awful. It's even more frustrating and annoying that you now have to wait over the holidays to report this.

 

Poor Kai, no wonder he had a meltdown.

 

Best wishes.

 

Caroline.

[elaine1]

<'> Oh my god, the kids arent even safe when coming home from school!. why the heck dont they check them before they put them together?.

[oxgirl]

It's unforgiveable, Loulou, that the escort hasn't said anything about this bullying to you, how long has it been allowed to go on, I wonder!! Perhaps you could write a stiff letter to the transport people to get it off your chest and post it off, at least it will be there on their desk waiting for them when they go back to work.

Good luck. <'>

 

~ Mel ~

[JsMum]

Also to consider at the end of the day if this other child is 11 years old then he could be charged with assualt and be arrested for assualt on a minor, I am only suggesting this if there is no way of this child been put in another taxi, this child sounds like he knows fully well what he is doing by the comment of he cant get into trouble because its half term, so your son could be a target every time the terms close in.

 

I know you will do all you can to prevent this child traveling but if they insist then I would be prepared to report this child to the police and have them charge him with assualt.

 

You have the evidence as the taxi driver witnessed this assault, and at the end of the day there is not really a lot he can do because of his own accusations if he where to step in.

 

This child who hit your son sounds like he needs an escort to keep other children safe, this could be one area that you aproach the transport team on.

 

Personally I would of reported it to the police and got the police to talk to the taxi driver to go further into this childs situation.

 

reporting assualts like this also gives a clear message to our children that assualting people in this callus way is the wrong to purposely punch someone like that especially when they are little and have special needs this other child needs proper supervision.

 

write a complaint and log down all that has happened.

 

Hope your son is ok now and I think he has been a star and I would hear him talk about power rangers all he likes. J loves power rangers too,

 

JsMum

[hev]

when steven was bullying other kids in his taxi i wasent told about it untill i got a letter from transport people telling me that he was going to be travelling on his own,it was going on for ages,i felt awful for other kids,i couldnt understand why escort,taxi driver didnt tell me,i used to go and say hello every day whats point of having an escort if they dont intervene or tell parents whats going on,i complained and they started using another taxi firm,maybe the boys mum who hit kai hasent got a clue whats going on,i never.

 

i think the school needs to look at taxi firm they use again,kai should feel safe in his taxi,im glad steven travels on his own,so much better,trouble is i think he saves all the bullying for me when he gets in

[PW66]

Oh how awful for you and your son.

 

I would definately complain to the transport people - your complaint should be taken very seriously, and hopefully your child or this other child can get moved to different transport. Its totally unacceptable for this to be happening, in any setting, but in a moving vehicle where the implications could be far more serious!

Cant believe the escort didnt bother to inform you of the incident!

Good luck and I hope you manage to get it sorted.

 

Paula

[loulou]

HI everyone,

 

Hope you all had a good christmas <'> ,

 

I've decided to write to the Head teacher, so the letter is on his desk the first day of term. I'll also call the Transport Dept and ask for Kai to go in another taxi. I know there are other children from this town who go to Kai's school.

 

Kai is still going on about his "plan" to get this boy back, so i know it's really bothering him. He has since told me that when he gets out of the taxi, the other two boys both say, "Bye you f*****g retard" .

 

I will not be taking this one lying down .

 

Loulou xx

[oxgirl]

Good for you Loulou, hope you get satisfactory responses from all concerned. No wonder your lad has been upset and unsettled, he must feel relieved that's he's gotten it off his chest now.

 

Good luck. <'>

 

~ Mel ~

[Bagpuss]

Well done Loulou, hope this is sorted, and quickly. Let us know how you get on <'> <'>

[hev]

good on you loulou,thats awful what those kids are calling kai he shouldnt have to go through that,do you have good relationship with kais school?

[loulou]

Hi Hev,

 

Yes i do have a good relationship with Kai's school (i'm sure they think i'm neurotic though!). They will not tolerate any physical violence or bullying, so i know this will be dealt with. I feel proud of Kai for not hitting back (he's pretty big and strong for 8), but i feel really sorry for him because he doesn't actually realise he's being bullied IYKWIM? I think he was just upset because his nose hurt, bless him!

 

He told me they have been hitting him in the stomach on other days, and he used his book bag as a shield. Then they said they'd bend his books instead. He told me he'd rather have his books damaged than be hit in the stomach .

 

I'm also really annoyed with the escort (it wasn't his usual one). Do these people get ANY training at all?

 

Grrrr, now i'm feeling all hyped up to write the letter!!!

 

Loulou xx

[hev]

my mum was an escort for about a year,she didnt have any training but this might differ with each taxi firm i spose.

 

glad your school dont tolerate any bullying,they will stop it right away once you tell them,i think the escort should be replaced as well,how can they miss it when its been going on over a period of time,the taxi cant be that big!!

 

take care of yourself,cant be long to go now for the baby can it?

[dooday24]

hope u get it all sorted after new yr its discusting hope kais ok lv donnaxx

[lil_me]

I'm also really annoyed with the escort (it wasn't his usual one). Do these people get ANY training at all?

Very basic and not actually worth them attending in all honesty. LEA is mean't to provide this but what they are sent on isn't really any good. Couple of handling techniques etc but not much, think it's still one day. Nothing specific about each disorder etc they will deal with and how to defuse situations.

 

Maybe it would be worth suggesting the escort sits between the boys if this is happening regularly unnoticed.

[loulou]

Hi everyone,

 

Just to let you know, i wrote to the head Teacher about the incident and got a call back yesterday. The two boys have been "severely" spoken to about it, which i'm sure they have been because the Head can be pretty scary when he wants to! Kai is now going in a new taxi with 2 different boys (who seem nice). He's much happier about it.

 

The escorts are also going to be spoken to about it, so i'm really glad i decided to write and not to just ignore it. I asked whether they have any training and i was told "hardly any". They definately however should have known to report anything untoward .

 

Thanks for all the advice <'> ,

 

Loulou xx

[jlp]

Glad to hear you were taken seriously and that Kai is going in a new taxi from now on. x

[oxgirl]

Oh well done loulou, I'm so glad this was taken seriously and dealt with properly. That must be such a weight off your's and your lad's minds. Hope he makes two nice new friends. <'>

 

~ Mel ~

Edited January 4, 2007 by oxgirl

[stressedmumto2]

Really glad to hear it has been taken seriously and I hope Kai likes being in the taxi with his new friends <'>

[cmuir]

Hi

 

Fantastic! Must be a big weight off your mind. Such a relief for you that the head took things seriously. At least now, hopefully staff will be more vigilant and act appropriately if/when anything untoward happens.

 

Caroline.