Hi Everyone feel a bit down

[andreasea]

Hello

My name is andrea I am married and have 2 children; O aged 5 and E aged nearly 4(asd)

Feeling quite down at the moment I HATE HOLIDAYS THEY ARE ######

As its difficult to get out because of E's behaviour, I am sooo stressed and feel quite alone

Just thought I would write this and get some contact from people who ' are in the know'

Sorry to sound such a miserable loser,but I just feel like it at the mo!!

[bid]

Welcome to the forum

 

Hope you find some support and a few laughs here along the way <'>

 

Bid

[forbsay]

Hello

 

Firstly, you are not alone. The people on this forum will know exactly whee you are coming from. <'> <'>

 

Take care

 

Forbsay

[JsMum]

Hi Andreasea, firstly a nice warm welcome, it is very nice to meet you, and yest I get very down at times, its called stress and never ending fighting to get our child needs met.

 

When i feel down it is a sure sign I need to readdress the ballance and look at looking after me too, some you time, and obvously to do this you need some support.

 

I would request some support over the summer holidays, and look into social services doing an assessment of need, J has a sessional Worker for two hours a week and regular home support though this has been weened off and gone to nothing again, but if you need help now then it is still worth it.

 

Its called a child in need assessment.

 

KIDS offer summer play groups, get intouch with these for further advice.

 

In our area there is a special needs activitiy group meeting two to three time a week ask your local council of a list of specail needs/disabilites activties for children and their families.

 

Contact A family have worker in certain areas otherwise they offer a helpline and can send you information on benefits, funding and activities that may be in your area.

 

NCH offer support to children with special needs by taking them to an activity and supporting them, this is done in our area so do check out NCH too.

 

It is absaloutly essential you get a break for a short period is there any family that could help you tempary until you get some help, or pay for a carer for a couple of hours a week, in your own home obvously, in the past I did this as I really needed the help at the time and SS wouldnt offer any at the time.

 

I would really advise you to get more help, CAB are aslo good at ensuring you get your needs met, otherwise writing a letter to your MP is also another way to get things moving.

 

You are doing a brilliant job, I struggle with one child, you have two and very close in age, I admire you, your doing a grand job, keep going you can do this.

 

JsMum

[Flora]

Hi Andrea

 

Welcome to the forum. Many people here know exactly where you're coming from.

 

Flora XX

[Kathrynh]

Have you tried using a major buggy to go out? It made a huge difference to me when B was about 4 or 5. He reached the point where he would regularly lie down and scream when we were out. I got a buggy and this meant i could take him out a lot in the summer. When he felt relaxed in a new place i was able to let him out to play. For the last 6 months ( B is just 7) we have rarely used it. We are having the best summer holiday we have had. We go out somewhere everyday, lots of new places and he is relaxed and happy in new situations. The only time I use the buggy now is when I want to stop for a cup of tea! B doesn't do sitting still!!

[andreasea]

Have you tried using a major buggy to go out? It made a huge difference to me when B was about 4 or 5. He reached the point where he would regularly lie down and scream when we were out. I got a buggy and this meant i could take him out a lot in the summer. When he felt relaxed in a new place i was able to let him out to play. For the last 6 months ( B is just 7) we have rarely used it. We are having the best summer holiday we have had. We go out somewhere everyday, lots of new places and he is relaxed and happy in new situations. The only time I use the buggy now is when I want to stop for a cup of tea! B doesn't do sitting still!!

 

thanks for all the replies i feel a lot better! especially j's mum i will call about the child in need assessment.

with regards to the buggy,E has a regular bugy still,he escapes form it,with the major buggy it was worse he could easily get out

he needs a straight jacklet!!! (i know i do too sometimes!!)

[JsMum]

E has a regular bugy still,he escapes form it,with the major buggy it was worse he could easily get out

he needs a straight jacklet!!! (i know i do too sometimes!!)

 

 

I remember J in his buggy, he would have a harness on him twice, one way and the other back to front, and then hooked into his pram, and guess what he still escaped. I remember getting rid of his buggy way to early and regretting it when he would run away from me, rains he just dangled and it was a complete nightmare, in the end we went everywhere on our cycle, he had a trailer, he loved that.

 

Goodluck, it cant be easy, hope the assessment helps to identify some area of support.

 

JsMum

[MandyB]

Hello

My name is andrea I am married and have 2 children; O aged 5 and E aged nearly 4(asd)

Feeling quite down at the moment I HATE HOLIDAYS THEY ARE ######

As its difficult to get out because of E's behaviour, I am sooo stressed and feel quite alone

Just thought I would write this and get some contact from people who ' are in the know'

Sorry to sound such a miserable loser,but I just feel like it at the mo!!

 

Hi Andrea,

 

I saw your message the other day but first chance to respond! I know just how you feel, the holidays just means more pressure for us to keep them amused and hope their behaviour doesn't make every small outing a complete nightmare! I have a son aged 4 recently diagnosed ASD and another little one 20 months who also needs lots of attention! It's so hard and makes me feel so lonely sometimes. Anyway I just wanted to say Hi and hope you will find "safe" things to do to make the days go by....roll on September....

 

Mandy B <'>

[andreasea]

Hi Andrea,

 

I saw your message the other day but first chance to respond! I know just how you feel, the holidays just means more pressure for us to keep them amused and hope their behaviour doesn't make every small outing a complete nightmare! I have a son aged 4 recently diagnosed ASD and another little one 20 months who also needs lots of attention! It's so hard and makes me feel so lonely sometimes. Anyway I just wanted to say Hi and hope you will find "safe" things to do to make the days go by....roll on September....

 

Mandy B <'>

 

thanks mandy

yes roll on sept

[elun1]

Hi I just read your message, I can really relate to your holiday dilemma! My children are close in age too. My eldest is 8 and his younger brother is 7. Going out is difficult at times and I rarely use the major buggy now but sometimes I miss it! The holidays are not actually 'holidays' at all and the 6 weeks is the biggest challenge of all. Every day I have to try and strucure things so both the boys can cope (eldest has aspergers and youngest severe autism) but they don't like the same things and I often end up tearing my hair out! I was dreading the summer hols this year and I asked social services for extra respite which I got - an extra 6hrs a week - a very good friend is doing the respite and we often choose to go out together with the boys which I really enjoy. I'm still looking forward to getting back to work though! Take care, remember it will soon be over!

Elun xx