Hello there, I'm beth, and I'm new round here...

[bethannie]

Hello!

 

I go by the name of bethannie or just beth. I am in my late forties and am in the process of being diagnosed with Aspergers. My Gp feels the daignosis fits, nut has referded me to a psychologist for a diagnosis.

 

Getting the diagnosis is a long, and terrifying procedure! My first psychiatrist said I was simply over anxious (Yes, I ws nervous, I'll even grant him that I was anxious, but this is a symtom of my Aspergers! I had made a journey to a strange hospital to see a stranger....that sends me into panic mode!)...After 3 months, and 2 sessions with him, he told me he was leaving and I would be seeing someone new (great!)...this new [psychiatrist (head of the dapartment) has seen me once and told me he doesn't know what Aspergers is, so I'll have to come back in 2 months time when he's had a chance to look it up! (And doesn't that sap my confidence in him!)

 

The more I read about Aspergers, the more I wonder that I didn't pick up the signs earlier. Everything seems to fit. Talking to mum, she confirms that she knew I was 'different' from an early age, she just never had a name for it back then.

 

I was diagnosed with clumsy child syndrome (and there's a terrific name for a condition!) when I was at primary school - now of course called dyspraxia. I struggled throughoput my schooldays, being exceptionally bright but constantly under-achieving despite obviously trying harder than the others. After I left school, with disappointing A-level results I tried to go to a Polytech, but couldn't cope. I came back home and started studying with the OU - whom I can not prraise highly enough! I discovered the joy and beauty that is maths, and got an honours degree. I made the mistake of taking my PGCE and trying to teach. Not a good idea! I couldn't cope with the large classes, the staffroom scared me and I had to leave the profession. I tried teaching adults in smaller groups, but found much the same problem. Now I'm unemployed, have been for a couple of years.

 

I live alone, and some days I really struggle. I don't have any friends - I meet people, but just can't 'do' the friend thing, no matter how hard I try. I have never had a boyfriend, which hurts more than I can say. I have problems with self-esteem anyway, being alone doesn't help. I have the best mum in the whiole world (And I make no apologies to you other mums out there, or thiose who think your mum is great....mine is simply the best!) I get petrified when I think of her dying....I don't see how I can go on without her...I wouldn't want to.

 

Living on benefits is tough. There is never enough money to cope. But somehow I do. It meand hard choices sometimes, I get some help with the rent ( through Housing Benefit) but have to make up the rest out of my meagre benefits. Then there is the bills and food, and that's where cutbacks/choices have to be made.

 

I've just recently had a letter calling me for a medical interview. This scares me. My GP and current psychiatrist agree that I am unable to look for work; what will I do if the government expert disagrees?

 

Soooooo, I've ramble don more than I expected to. Probably more than I should. (I do that sometimes...take hours to start to speak and then don't know when to shut up!). Some of the stuff looks like I'm feeling sorry for myself. I'm not really. I', generally cheerful - honest! It's just been a bad couple of days.

 

I just thought I'd sign up here, and even though I know there's no cure (and if I'm totally honest, would I want one? ...Aspergers is part of me, has been all my life....and strange to say, there are actually a few up-sides to it!) and if my life is rough at the moment, there's not much anyone can do, I have to make the best of a bad situation. But I thought it might be nice to know there are others out there who know what I'm going through.

 

Anyway, that's me introducing myself in a roundabout way!

 

Hi!

 

beth

[bethannie]

Uggggh! Sorry about the spelling/typing....I'm on a borrowed computer and the stupid spell-check doesn't work and the background is white (I prefer beige, less glare)....

[ScienceGeek]

Welcome Beth, don't worry about the spelling. Getting a diagnosis as an adult can be frustrating at times because a lot of places don't know much about ASDs and will happily admit it too. Have you tried calling the NAS and finding out from them where the nearest professional to you who is qualified to diagnose adults is? Anyway I hope that you find this place useful, there have been a few more adults with ASDs on here recently which is nice

[NickyB]

Hello, Beth and welcome

[something_different]

hello and welcome Beth!

 

I have also never had a bf in my life, though now i don't stress about it as i feel that it just gonna be the way my life is meant to be, I don't see me ever wanting to share my room or even my bed with a partner anyways!

 

I also have no friends but find chatting to ppl online helps

 

welcome to our forum i hope u like it here

[TheNeil]

Hello

 

I was going to say that I'd never had a boyfriend either...but as I'm a bloke (and I don't swing that way) that's not really a problem is it?

 

Hope you find the forum useful

[Kathryn]

hello Beth and welcome to the forum

 

K x

[billabong]

I've just recently had a letter calling me for a medical interview. This scares me. My GP and current psychiatrist agree that I am unable to look for work; what will I do if the government expert disagrees?

 

Hi Beth

 

Welcome to the forum <'> >: I'm sure you'll find lots of support and advice here. Re going for a medical interview, I can't speak from my own experience (I just hate going to the doctor and feel anxious that I'll not say what I mean to say!) but am sure that the medic you see will be thorough, in which case he/she should come to the same conclusion as two other professionals. You should be able to take someone with you - your wonderful mum maybe? I'm also sure that you'll get helpful comments via this forum from people who've been through the interview/assessment process; I've seen several threads already along those lines.

 

Kind regards

 

Billabong

[Clare63]

Hiya Beth,

 

Welcome to the forum, I just know you will find it useful, supportive and insightful.

 

Clare

[JsMum]

Well How can I not reply to your post, it was absaloutly brilliant, it made me laugh and it made tears well up in my eyes, you have described your life and all about your self wounderfully, and I soo related to lots you said, you have come to understand and except AS and thats fantastic, your spirit is finally free, and wow your mum, she sounds fab too, I loved how you wrote how great she is.

 

Well firstly about income, it may be that you could be entitled to other benefits, I strongly recommend you write to your MP who can refer you to the WELFARE RIGHTS SERVICES who can go throw more detail what you are entitled to.

 

You have really been throw it and yet you have come to aceptance such a lot, you sound wonderful and if you want you can add me to your new list of friends.

 

There is loads of information on the boards so do moach around, feel free to post and I cant wait to read some more of your posts.

 

A warm Welcome.

 

<'>

 

JsMum

 

Edited November 7, 2008 by JsMum

[SuzyQ]

Hi beth,

 

this is such a good forum welcome, and know you are never alone on your roller coaster ride, there is always someone here with you. I have a daughter who has just been diagnosed with Asperges, and I have taken an online test as they think she is similar to me... I am proud to say I did do quite well....I scored a mamouth 119 out of 200 in favour of Asperges, so I am a bit half and half, it has helped me understand some of my odd behaviour and panics in life.

 

good luck and just keep plugging away you will get there eventually

[Tally]

Hi Beth, and welcome to the forum.

 

I was diagnosed with AS last year, aged 25. I too found the NHS had very little understanding of it. Have you contacted the National Autistic Society at all? They might be able to tell you your nearest diagnostic service on the NHS, and you could ask your psychiatrist to refer you there. Clearly your psychiatrist is not qualified to diagnose!

 

Although there is no cure, understanding that you have AS can lead you toward strategies to help you cope with the situations that you find hard. There is very little formal support available to adults with AS, so a diagnosis is unlikely to lead to appropriate support. You might find that you can pick up plenty of tips and advice without needing a formal diagnosis anyway. But I do understand why a formal diagnosis is so important, because it was to me.